I am getting worse

[Alexapal]

I have not been able to leavd my bed or my room. I know it is up to me but I have sheer panic and anxiety to take a shower or go outside. I am missing appointments things are falling behind. Tonight I feel pain all over my body. I feel actual suffering and I am terrified of tomorrow and what is happening. I called my doctor today for emergency she never called back. My mother looks so stressed out it is breaking my heart I am not doing anything for her and she needs the help. I am irritated znd frustrated in my own body and I won't budge. I feel like there is no light no hope. I am really hurting and scared.

[Downinil]

Please call 988. There are trained support providers who will talk you through this. Just Please do not hurt yourself or anyone else. I know that sounds harsh but sometimes when people are in fight or flight mode they can do things they would never normally do. Please hold your composure. You will get through this.

[Alexapal in reply to Downinil]

Thank you for caring and understanding. I call all the time. I feel really hopeless on a very deep level tonight.

[Downinil in reply to Alexapal]

I have felt like that for so long I’m getting used to it.

[Alexapal]

I have to take care of her she needs me and I can't.

[Alexapal]

I lay here muscles sore I want to stop this I want to wake up fgom this nightmare.

[Sunrisetabby]

I am sorry to hear what you are going through and that you can't see any hope at the moment. I know it sounds impossible, but my sense is that you really need to try and relax and breathe. Panic and anxiety can absolutely lead to debilitating pain, and sometimes strong pain relievers are needed to get relief. Do you have any over the counter prescription medicine that can help with the anxiety and pain, of prescriptions that you are currently on. Urgent care or emergency room is definitely an option if you are unable to get through to your doctor. Hopefully, you can get one rest tonight and get assistance from your doctor tomorrow. Sending good vibes and best wishes. Also, to echo corgi_fan above, white noise machines are very helpful for me - or just finding q white noise to play on your phone. It still sounds silly to me, but airplane noises seem to be the most soothing and sleep inducing for me.

[Alexapal]

I was taking card of her for years I changed got worse on meds and now I just lay here in fear I don't move that is the problem everything is crumbling around me now I cznt even.drivd to appointments scared to go out. I am in serious trouble.

[Starrlight]

((((((((hug))))))))

[Dolphin14]

We have so many trolls here 🙄

People that seem to have nothing else to do.

We don't welcome trolls. It's a shame people that troll have nothing better to do with their life.

🐬

[Dolphin14]

Night

[Thurlesy]

There is hope Alexapal. You have insight. You know how unwell you are feeling. You know you need to see your Doctor. Some people can not see how they are at all. They are blind to their illness. Having insight is a blessing and a resource. It is a self preservation mechanism. You will get help and you will get better eventually. I have been where you are, down deep in the hearts hell. I also berated myself when I saw my poor mother helpless to do anything for me, and the pain I could sense in her as she watched me in such turmoil. But things always get worse before they get better. Your doctor will help you. You deserve help and kindness. Please do not give up now. In the depths of my illness my doctor told me that these illnesses are cyclical and will get worse and better in cycles. So everytime you are feeling bad, know that as time passes, it will eventually start to turn and you will get better again. And similarly when you are really well, you must mind yourself and know that you are susceptible to having a downturn. So have a plan ready so that when you start to feel that little downturn you go and get help then, do not wait for it to get any worse. The secret to staying well is knowing yourself, and seeing the small signs, and getting yourself better before you get any worse. Hang in there Alexapal. We have all been where you are. We can all feel your hurt and pain. You owe yourself to get help and get better.

Best wishes to you 🌻

[Alexapal]

I am still day 4 in bed I got up brushed my teeth came back to bed I feel trapped why won't I just do it and get into the shower. I feel nothing no motivation no will no strength. I have never gotten to this point where it is this bad. I havd not washed my hair. This is a very bad illness I never thought this would happen like this to me. How can I not think of everything falling apart shen it is and everyday it is worse. I am in pure fear and I am unable to get up st all what will happen to me. I called my boyfriend in morning all he did was be angry and it hurts. My mother needs her things and trying her best on walker. Noone to help me at all with groceries and just being a strong support for me. I call crisis lines I feel worse. I can't drive to mh doctor today. It is snowing and wet my stomach hurts so so so much. I havd no relief from constant emoyltionsl physical mental anguish. How can I take these small steps..

[Alexapal]

I think the person is gone from the feed. I did not intend for any upsets for anyone.

[MadBunny in reply to Alexapal]

It's not your fault . You can't be held accountable for others' behaviour x