its getting worse, why can't i get him out of my head.

[Estherblue]

I wrote a post sometime ago about my current situation of suffering from depression, the thing is i have a friend, a guy whose been asking me out for a while, but the thing is he's a flirt, he has a girlfriend and like 3 other side chicks. I turned him down but we still remain close friends. Now he doesn't call me like he used to and he has gone back to breaking girls heart. But the thing is, i think i like him and i miss him. The thought of him with other girls makes me sad, i can't get him out of my head and this adds to my depression. I know what am feeling is totally wrong, and am trying hard to get it out of my head but its not working. I know deep down, he is not what i want , but i think its because, i have been used to him always being with me or caring for me that is why am finding it hard to let go, because i have no body else to care for me and no one to understand me. But its driving me insane i don't know what to do, i feel so lonely and am always thinking of him. but i know he's not coming back to me, he just wanted to see if he could get in my pants and when he saw that he couldn't he left. But y can't i stop feeling this way. Pls someone help me. I dont want to feel this way, its making my depression way worse.

[hypercat54]

Hi it's not right or wrong to feel the way you do but you are very wise to avoid this man. But if you like him and know the score what's the harm in seeing him? It doesn't have to be the Mr Right we are all looking for but a bit of fun on the way to finding him. Maybe then you will be able to get him out of your system. x

[RoseEnchanted]

Sweetheart is normal to feel the way you feel about this guy. But you did good by turning him down because you know the kind of guy he is, and by the end he was going to break your heart which is worse than what you are experiencing right now. You deserve better, you are better than him. Also, look around and you will find people who really care about you. Do not give up, be strong!!!

[Estherblue in reply to RoseEnchanted]

Thank you

[Dicksoan]

Its a difficult situation I nenver thought this things happen I'm talking as a man. But honestly I say that you should not go for him because if you do your going to feel more pain than your feeling now bcoz he is not going to change. I myself am doing what he is doing and the goals is simple. To get into pents and pass. That guy is not looking for love. No he wants constant sex. So be careful.

[Agora1]

Estherblue, "Don't allow a moment of pleasure ruin the rest of your life."

Taken from a poster on my OBG's wall....

The only person this man cares about is himself. You deserve more than that. x

[Estherblue in reply to Agora1]

Tnks

[Agora1 in reply to Estherblue]

I care about you Estherblue. x

[Estherblue in reply to Agora1]

Tnk u so much

[maggief9812]

You’re feelings aren’t right or wrong, they just are, and that’s okay. But it is important to examine the real root of what is causing them.

You know he’s just looking for sex. The fact that he stopped “caring” for you and being in your life when it became clear he wasn’t going to get any, makes it crystal clear he never actually cared for you in the first place. This is not the behavior of a true friend. You’re missing and wanting for the idea of what you thought he was... someone you can feel close to and cared by... but he was never your friend, he is a user. I agree with the other replies, this lesser man is just not worth your time or grief and is unhealthy for you. In your heart you already know that. When you get to missing him, remember that it’s not actually him you miss. It’s the idea of someone who will be good to you, and a real person like that IS out there.

I know it’s hard to keep your heart open after experiencing his rejection, but there are good, true people in the world who will value you for *who* you are and not just what’s under your clothes. Keep your eyes open for them, you’ll find them. ❤️

[Estherblue in reply to maggief9812]

Tnk u so much, i really needed to hear that

[Tara52]

I am sure you've been told you deserve better and you do! Guys won't respect you if you don't respect yourself. I understand because I got into relationships like that and I was miserable ! It felt better to be alone. When I refocused on a career and had a good friend or two I found more stability and peace in my life. Be realistic it's not him that you miss. You want real love and affection not just being used for sex. Get your mind off of him and find some thing of interest you can study and get a degree, Best wishes!😍