will the mornings ever get better? - Anxiety and Depre...

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will the mornings ever get better?

Daisy425 profile image
54 Replies

yesterday I had a better day than Monday. But the mornings are still hard for me. I wake up and I get jittery. I feel anxious. When will that feeling go away? This has happened to me in the past where after a few days it goes away, but I’m getting impatient. I just want to be back to normal.

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Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425
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54 Replies
sabres4love profile image
sabres4love

I am feeling the same way today. So far, not feeling as good as yesterday. I hope it gets better for both of us today. I feel impatient also with how long this has been going on. Try to hang in there and I will talk to you soon! ❤️

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

Hang in there! I’ll be thinking of you today! We can do this. I hope your day has gotten better. Unfortunately mine hasn’t. The anxiety is horrible but it’s constantly there. Yesterday I had moments where it went completely away.

Beevee profile image
Beevee

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself for things to get better. They will, once you stop putting pressure on yourself to feel better. Let recovery come to you.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Beevee

I find that some of my anxiety is centered around whether or not things will get better.

Beevee profile image
Beevee in reply to Daisy425

Accept those anxious thoughts too. I went through that phase too. Just consign them all to a bin labelled "Anxiety crap" and move on.Remember that anxiety and all symptoms only hang around because you feed them by respecting and fearing them.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Beevee

My stomach is sore.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to Daisy425

This is my biggest problem also! I get thinking about what my life used to be like and how much I want it to be more like that and it upsets me how far I feel like I have fallen. I know is better to stay positive, but is so hard knowing how long all of this has been going on already.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love

I will think of you also! I have my good moments also where "forget" about it for a bit, but it always comes back, unfortunately. Hope you can have a better afternoon!

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment

Recovery is possible and will come. I am proof of such. Not too long ago I was in such a panic all the time I couldn’t even leave my bed. I was afraid of everything. I panicked about everything and nothing. Today I can go places, I’m living. Sure I still have bad days but I have more good days than bad days. I’m not special, I just learned to think different. I’m not afraid of anxiety anymore. If I panic, bring it on. If my heart is pounding, speed it up, let’s see what you’re made of. I know that nothing bad can actually happen from it now. It’s just a miserable feeling that WILL pass.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

I just feel like the feeling should have passed by now.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

Anxiety will last as long as you are afraid of the sensations. As long as you keep your parasympathetic nervous system engaged you will keep releasing cortisol and stay at a heightened state. Once you engage your parasympathetic your begin releasing the feel good hormones and calm down and your tired nervous system can rest. I’ve gone months and months at high anxiety because I didn’t know how to bring myself down. I could get through the panic attacks but not the general anxiety that was leftover. You have to give yourself time. You’re never going to make anxiety go away. It’s a natural process. An important process that would save your life in an emergency. It’s just not necessary when there isn’t a present threat. Have you tried any meditations to find some quiet and ground yourself? I’m happy to offer some up if you’re interested.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to MindfulMoment

I agree with Daisy here. I am more discouraged because I could see how much progress I had made, but last month or so I feel like am going backwards again. My therapist keeps telling me I need to change my way of thinking, but I haven't gotten there yet.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to sabres4love

Changing how I think was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. And I certainly have times I get sucked back into old habits. Denying the warning system our primal selves have to keep us safe feels so foreign at first. It takes facing things in steps. Something small at first, then bigger and bigger. My first step was literally getting out of bed and going somewhere else in my house. Now I can go out of town for a weekend and actually enjoy myself. It’s a simple concept but it is so so difficult. But it’s the ONLY thing that has ever worked for me. I’ve had anxiety 20+ years. I’ve done CBT, talk therapy, taken loads of medication, meditated, breathed and breathed and breathed. As soon as I began to accept the feelings as just a chemical reaction and literally nothing more, day by day my world opened up. Will I spiral again? Probably at some point. And if I do, I’ll accept that as well because I know the way back.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

I’m going to try to go for a drive since it’s beautiful out and take my mind off things.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

Great idea!!! I like to go by the store and get sour candy and drive around with loud music on hahaha. That’s my happy place!

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to Daisy425

That is a great idea. Driving is one thing that helps me a lot.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to MindfulMoment

That is wonderful progress you have made. You sound very confident. Trying to gain confidence that I can/am getting better has been very hard. I will feel like I am gaining some momentum and then something will trigger me again and I will start losing it again. I struggle telling the difference between anxiety and something really being wrong.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to sabres4love

When I first started lurking in this site, I was broken. I thought I’d never be ok again. I had experienced a nervous breakdown. I hated myself and anxiety was my worst enemy. I still have times I’m not sure as well. I don’t trust myself. In those times I trust my husband’s judgement. I allow him to give me a grounding thought and I bank on it with my life until I can get my thoughts back straight. Life is a dance, steps forward and steps back :) hang in there.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to MindfulMoment

Thanks so much for the kind words and advice. I really appreciate it. I have been struggling for a long time now. Just discovered this website a few days ago and it is great. Makes me feel not so alone. You hang in there also.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

I am struggling with the same thing! My last really bad bout of anxiety happened when I was on a trip to Nashville in early June and that’s what sparked me to go to the IOP group that I went to. Since the group I felt like I was doing so good I felt so proud of myself, and I really felt like maybe I finally had my anxiety under my control. And now for something completely random. I’m so upset that this is happening. I’m worried I’ll have to change my medication which I really don’t want to do because I’m on a pretty high dose of Zoloft and I’ve never played around with my medication’s. I don’t piece extreme anxiety typically sometimes things trigger it and that’s when I spiral. But I don’t know that medicine is necessarily going to completely fix it. I think I need to learn how to cope

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

What we’re you doing before that was so helpful? And are you still doing those things daily? A lot of times we think there isn’t a trigger but there’s always something small that gets us going and it’s a spiral from there. What has changed for you since you were feeling good? Are you going through something stressful, have you been sick recently? Medicine won’t fix it completely. It does help, but you still have to put in the work. It’s a tool to get you to a place you can put in that work. Zoloft is a great drug for anxiety. As well as lexapro. Have you seen a psychiatrist to tweak your meds? Sometimes adding in and lowering doses on something can hit a sweat spot.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

I was talking to a group of people three times a week. It was nice having thag support. Maybe that’s why I turned here recently. I’m seeking that support and others to just hear me out. I’m also under a lot of stress with work, and the last few months I didn’t have work bc I’m a teacher and have the summers off. I don’t think the stress is helping the anxiety. I’m on 225mg of Zoloft which is the most the doctor will prescribe. Day to day it’s fine but when something triggers my anxiety bad it takes a few days to overcome. I really don’t want to play with my meds because I think that may make me more anxious.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to Daisy425

Learning to cope is definitely key and something I haven't mastered yet either. Something will trigger me and I will feel like I am starting all over again. I know medicine alone won't fix it; my psychiatrist and therapist both agree on that. I wish was a magic pill we could take to make it go away, but there unfortunately isn't. I think talking it out with other people, especially in this written format (I am a better writer than speaker), is very helpful. At least it has been for me. I think we will always have anxiety, but need to figure out ways to deal with it better.

Beevee profile image
Beevee in reply to sabres4love

Setbacks are part of recovery and will diminish in sensation the more you accept and pass through them. In my experience, you will have passed caring about them any way.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Beevee

Well said Beevee. It’s so true. You can’t believe it can really be that simple but it really is. It’s like all these years of suffering and all you had to do was stop caring so much about it. Feels like a dirty trick lol

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

I just don’t know how to let go

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

You start by just curating the attitude. Do some research into understanding what anxiety is and what it isn’t. Then with confidence you can start telling yourself this is anxiety, it isn’t dangerous and can’t hurt me. For me, reading Dr. Claire Weekes “self-help for your nerves” changed everything for me.

bonkers65 profile image
bonkers65 in reply to MindfulMoment

I know anxiety isn't dangerous and can't hurt me, but it is VERY UNCOMFORTABLE!!!!

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to bonkers65

Of course it is. I’m not saying it isn’t. It can feel like pure torture. I one time told my doctor I’d stand on my head, naked in the middle of a crowd if it would make it go away. But discomfort passes. You breath through it and accept and it’ll go away. And each time it returns the fear of that discomfort is less and less because you know how to make it stop. If you don’t care if you feel uncomfortable, it’ll stop being so uncomfortable because anxiety is the fear of that feeling.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

I feel like maybe this bout of anxiety is happening because it is a test. I’m trying so hard to push through it.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

It’s not a test. It means nothing. It’s a chemical process. Stop trying to PUSH through and just accept where you are and how you feel. You’re never going to fight your way through anxiety. You have to submit. Go about your day, let anxiety be with you and create neutral feeling towards it. It’s just chemicals.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

Can anxiety cause an increase in body temp?

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

yes! The fight or flight reaction leads to a dump of adrenaline which in turn increases heart rate, blood flow, and body temperature. There is a well documented “psychogenic fever” which is a fever from anxiety. But even if it’s an illness, so what people get viruses every day. Unless you are immune compromised you’ll be fine. Think of it as an excercise for your immunity, to protect you in the future.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

Would you consider 99 a fever? Our nurses say we can come in if it’s below 100

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

99 is not a fever.

Beevee profile image
Beevee in reply to Daisy425

Accept that you don't know how to let go. To simplify it even more, go about your day and live your life as if you weren't anxious. Take the anxiety with you, feel the fear and do it anyway.

Make your life bigger than your anxiety.

That's it.❤️

Beevee profile image
Beevee in reply to MindfulMoment

I've always said anxiety is the biggest confidence trickster out there. People just need to call its bluff.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love

How's it going? I was doing ok until had to get ready to leave for work. Is only for a few hours, but I work in an office and I am alone today and I really don't like being alone anymore. I used to love it, but not so much anymore.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

I’m doing okay. I’m a teacher and the school day just ended. I’m forcing myself to stay at work for a little so that I am productive and don’t just lay in bed. My stomach is sore still. I’m scared I’m sick but I ate pizza last night and was fine. My stomach didn’t hurt last night either. So I’m assuming it’s anxiety?

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

Daisy, are you afraid of specifically throwing up or just being sick in general? Specific phobias require some CBT work to work through. Are you working with your therapist at all to address this? It might really be helpful.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

I don’t know if my therapist specializes in CBT. I have had her as my therapist since I was a kid and I’m really comfortable with her. I don’t want to lose her. I don’t know much about CBT and how to go about it. We talked a lot in my IOP group about the connections between thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. I’m mostly afraid of throwing up but getting covid also terrifies me. I live alone and being isolated for five days was somewhat traumatic for me. My school has a new covid policy which basically says that teachers and students can come to school if they have covid and don’t have to mask, as long as they have been fever free for 24 hours. They are treating it like a cold. That’s nice for me because if I get it, I can still work. But it scares me bc I could be coming in contact with it with my students and not even know. I had a student who was out with a head cold and just came back to school today. The last time I saw him was on Friday of last week. I am terrified he actually had covid. His mom told the school a head cold, but he told me covid. He is also very young and kids just say things. I’m just having a hard time today

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to Daisy425

I am so sorry you are having a tough time today. I agree about the Covid stuff. When it first started, I was still working my job at the grocery store and it was so crazy and terrifying. I still don't like being in large crowds or being too close to people I don't know for too long. Some things will never go back to the way it was before it happened for me. You are right, kids do just stay stuff sometimes so who knows if he had it or not. I would look at it as not wanting to even know if he had it. It just triggers the anxiety about it even more.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

You’re right! I’m just worried because I’m supposed to stay at my moms house Friday. I was so excited to be able to be near her. She always makes me feel better. And we have a wedding Saturday. But now I’m worried I’ll get covid

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

CBT is life changing. It teaches you to challenge what scares you and see a different perspective.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

I can tell you, I had COVID 3 times. It sucked but I was ok. I loved when everyone had to stay home, that’s the life for me hahaha. I kid I kid. I understand. So do you think the fear of being sick is your biggest trigger? It sounds like you like being at work and with people. It’s just the fear you’ll get sick? What about that scares you?

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to MindfulMoment

I believe being sick is my biggest trigger. I live alone so I hate that if I’m sick and feeling crappy I’m completely alone. I hate feeling uncomfortable. As for throwing up I think I have ptsd from when I first had anxiety. I would throw up every morning

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love

Yes, it is most likely anxiety. I know the feeling. That is great that you are a teacher and able to still push through the days. I am proud of you for doing that when I know how difficult it must be. I went to school to be a teacher and got to student teaching and realized it wasn't for me. People told me that I still have a degree and can do lots of things! I tried some other things and just nothing has been right for me. I had worked two jobs for 13 years until the anxiety got to be to much and I went on leave from my one job and ended up never going back. I feel like I should go back to the two jobs and my therapist even encouraged me to do it, but I just don't know if my anxiety can handle it. I live with family so I am Ok as far as that goes, but I feel like I should be doing MORE. This anxiety is just the worst for a person to go through.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

I completely sympathize with you. I feel like we are one and the same. And while I hate you are going through this, there is some comfort in knowing that I am not alone. That someone understands. It is very hard in the mornings recently. This only happens every so often when I am in an anxious spell. This happens to be one of those times. As much as I want to stay in bed, I find that work is a huge distraction for me. Now that I am home (I live alone) my mind starts to race and think about how tomorrow morning I have to go through this again.

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love in reply to Daisy425

Yes, I feel like we are very similar as well. It is comforting to know I have some people to talk to about this. I have a co-worker who also deals with anxiety and she told me that unless you go through it yourself, you don't understand what it really feels like. I used to work early mornings at the store, but I have completely gotten away from that routine. I only have to work in the mornings at the office two days a week now and those days are a struggle to wake up and get going. Is part of the reason why I am hesitating about going back to a second job. I remember all of the shifts this past winter that I struggled to get up and go to work (I don't usually call off and I think I only ended up doing it once). Working thru the shifts and being around people who had no idea what I was suffering thru was so hard. That is good that work helps you. I find that the office helps me also, once I get there; that is the hard part. Right, this feeling like is never-ending is so very hard. I know it is hard, but try to find something relaxing to do that can maybe take your mind off tomorrow for a bit. Is there anything you like to do as a hobby or watch on TV? I have a few soap operas that I watch. They are so ridiculous and silly I find it helps sometimes. But I understand how when are extremely anxious is hard to take mind off it.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

I was going to light a candle and maybe put on a show while I do some grading! I’ve fallen behind on that. I was able to eat two pieces of leftover pizza from last night which is good. I might have another slice later if I feel hungry. I’ve also been going to bed pretty early

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love

That sounds like a great idea. I am so glad you were able to eat and may even have some more later. Yes, resting up is definitely helpful. Hope you have a better night. ❤️

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

I hope you have a great night. I know anxiety is exhausting

sabres4love profile image
sabres4love

It sure is. I hope you have a better day tomorrow.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to sabres4love

Thank you! I hope you do too! I’m sure I’ll be posting tonight/tomorrow. So annoying but it’s helpful to have the support

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