Does it ever get better.?

[Twitch7119]

So I'm just looking for what hows say about their anxiety and depression. I've been battling anxiety and depression for 19 years now. I've have highs and very low lows. I talk to a therapist once a week and I've been on every anti anxiety medication there is and it does help but I always wonder will it get better? Will I battle this the rest of my life and if so how do I cope when it feel like the world is out to get me and anxiety seems to run my life?

[Eklektik]

Hi again, the best stuff I've found against anxiety is acceptance. Quite challenging, even scary a the beginning, but it seems the best. The principle is not to fight anxiety since when you fight it, your actually fuel it. A lot of people here will direct you to Claire Weekes books on soothing your nerves. Myself, I have a preference for ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). Cognitive behavioral therapy is often advocated. Finding your triggers, identifying your "automatic" intrusive thought patterns, learning to recognize catastrophic scenarios and desensitizing yourself to them. There is exposure therapy. Problem solving can also help. The basics of a healthy lifestyle, sleep, diet, exercise, interpersonal relationships also have an impact of anxiety. There are lots of approaches and I am finding that you can build a toolbox by drawing items from this variety of approaches. And then there is what I call the basic universals : breathing, relaxation and meditation.

And I am finding that ACT also works for depression, so when you practice it, you get benefits on both fronts, anxiety and depression.

Hope some of this can help you. Be well

[Twitch7119 in reply to Eklektik]

Thank you again. Yeah I do tend to fight my anxiety because I feel like I should be able to just stop it and make it go away I know that is not the case. I have tired CBT in the past and yes it does help. I guess it's hard in the world today because when you try and talk about anxiety so many people say you just want attention or you could stop if you wanted to.

[Eklektik in reply to Twitch7119]

About that, one of the strategies I learned in the workshop was to choose who I can talk/ask for help about different aspects of anxiety. Indeed, lots of people have no clue what anxiety really is. Some will listen with openness event if they don't know it personally. Some people will be more understanding if you explain it. But for those who keep saying you just want attention or you could stop if you wanted to, well, in my experience, I have found it is better to let go of the subject. I still talk to those people on other topics but I chose people who will be caring when I talk anxiety or depression. Here is a good place for that.

[Hb2003]

It will get better you just have to try to push through it . I have also done therapy and its like a godsend to me it has helped me a lot . Lots of peace love kindness and support to you 🙏

[Twitch7119 in reply to Hb2003]

Thank you very much.

[Hb2003 in reply to Twitch7119]

Your welcome 🙏☺️

[Jeff1943]

You have tried meds. You have tried therapy. But your problem continues. It's time to take control of your anxiety rather than leaving it to pharmaceutical companies and others.

Read again Eklektik's first post here in reply to yours. It's the best advice you're ever going to get. Acceptance (for the time being) stops you fuelling more cortisol and adrenaline than your nervous system can handle. Eventually those nerves become less sensitised and the anxiety and depletion yield.

It's challenging as Eklektik says. Because it involves you curing yourself rather than thinking that a pill or a chat with the right person will do it for you.

It's hard work until it starts to work. But a lot less hard work than putting up with anxiety each and every day.

[Zhangliqun]

Some pretty solid advice I've seen in here so far. The most critical thing is to never, ever give in to the idea that your mental illness is anything like a reliable indicator of the truth about the world outside your head. Once you understand that it's a lie, it becomes far less powerful because you become much less afraid of it. Fear that it will come again will often make it come again.

In my view, the people at greatest risk of suicide are the ones who start to believe that the whole world is hopeless and pointless, not just their own situation, meaning that in their minds, there is nowhere for them to escape the rising floodwaters even if they can get out of their heads for a moment. At that point, you're in a tailspin that's hard to pull out of. I almost ate a pistol in '94 because of it.

Something that really helps me is remembering that the moods do come -- and go. Just remembering that largely de-claws the lacerating despair that may be slicing and dicing me at the moment because I know from long experience that it will go. Yes, in the moment it feels like I have been in this nightmarish mood from eternity past and will be in it forever, but it will go. In remembering that I immediately feel significantly better. But again it is absolutely critical that you believe that there is goodness and worthwhile-ness in the world outside your head. Because it really is there.

Another thing that may sound stupid but really works for me is that just scrunching up my shoulders or allowing my face to sink into a grimace is a trigger. I start to get anxious and my stomach starts to boil. (Your physical posture really does make a big difference in your mental state.) But if I force myself to relax my face and shoulders, the anxiety will go away almost every time. Subconsciously I'll start to scrunch and grimace again and the anxiety returns, but again I force my face and shoulders to relax.

You may have to repeat this process about 50 or 100 times until it goes away for an extended period, so DO NOT be discouraged if it doesn't work right away. After a while this and other 'tricks' become second nature and you're able to judo this thing almost absently, like flipping a light switch or flushing the can. There will still be bad days but there will be fewer of them and on average, they will be less severe.

Some have said to focus on things that produce good feelings in you to push out the bad. You have probably heard this a lot but again, this is solid advice. Different things work for different people but I love looking at pictures of fall foliage, just hypnotizes me. In person is ideal but you can do that any time of year on line, lots of great fall picture sites. Maybe a favorite restaurant or some happy memories. Or going to the hardware store and feeling the constructive atmosphere -- positive things you can do with tools and parts and nails etc to fix something at the house or maybe a hobby or project -- that runs so contrary to the sense of futility this illness stuffs down your throat. Anything that gives you even 5 minutes away from the bad thought patterns is a point gained; it's 5 minutes you weren't feeding this snake. That matters. Once again, it will be difficult at first, but once again it will become second nature after a while.

Last but not least, these things and all the other solid advice I've seen in here are coping skills -- or more to my point, weapons. DO NOT be passive and hope this illness will go away on its own, it won't. You must stomp the head of this snake day in and day out, because you are in World War Twitch7119, a war for your soul -- and the souls of others (more on that below).

This means you must be willing to fight and fight hard, which means you must believe you have something to fight for. You do. Friends and family and -- get this -- others who are as sick or sicker than you and me, who you don't know yet but who will die by their own hand if you give up now because they will never get encouragement and advice from the voice of experience -- you. God will put you in the path of people new to this illness for this reason, as he has done with me. He will make this illness, yes, worthwhile...

If I sound like Patton in front of that big flag, so be it. When you're up against an enemy as cunning and deadly as mental illness, you need to be a rabid rottweiler with stars on its shoulders. FIGHT!!!

[Midori]

Have you ever been investigated For Bi-Polar Syndrome? It might be a thought to ask your doctor.

I have a couple of friends with it and they are either way 'up' or down in the depths. Medication can hep keep you on an even keel.

Cheers,Midori

[cbgrace1980]

I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I struggle with depression and anxiety as well so I can relate to you. Some days are better than others, so it's okay to celebrate the good days and reach out on the harder days. Thank you for sharing your struggle with us. We are here for you. Things will get better.