I'm breaking down mentally. It wasn't always like this. Physical pain can be too much. Just like emotional pain, mental pain. I have crohns disease, fibromyalgia, degenerative disk disease in my lower back, bad joint pain from an inflammatory disease, now I have red marrow reconversion or blood cancer. My stomach and insides always hurt. It hurts to eat. It hurts to go shit. I feel my food pass through damaged parts of my intestines. Whatever is determined to be the new diagnosis is causing a lot, I mean a lot of pain I'm not a wimp, to move my arms and walk. It hurts to move. I haven't looked that much into it. I haven't even went for the blood work or follow up. I don't want to know. I do but not right now or something. I can't handle another painful condition. My chest hurts more just thinking about this.
This is what makes me the most hopeless. All of this pain. It's agony to get up and use the restroom when I wake up. Im not going to name things because I can honest to God say that everything hurts. I know it's not any good to put off this new issue. It still hurts. It's still getting worse. Whatever it is acts very quick. In a year it came on and progressed to disabling pain. I don't know if this is why my left leg has lost feeling or why my hand hurts so badly.
I do have extra empathy and compassion for people who suffer physically and mentally. It's a never ending cycle of mental pain causes physical pain, physical pain causes mental pain.