Hello everyone

[Saraivhdheed]

I'm new here. So I don't know what to write, but I'll try. I'm scared, sad, and guilty. I think I like to keep everyone away from me. I don't want anyone to feel responsible for me, so I keep them all away. And now I can't find anyone to talk to. And I can't complete my treatment for a number of reasons. So here, I'm just here I wish I could go back like before. 💔

[Marysblue]

We re here. You made a great step in getting on here. Join in some of the posts and read what other people have tried that works. I isolate and push people away too and then wonder why I don't have many friends. That's just part of depression I think. If you're aware of it you can take steps to change it even if they're small steps like contacting one friend a week o purpose. I get overwhelmed, insecure, stressed out or people get on my nerves and I'll isolate for days on end.Glad you're on here.

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Marysblue]

I well try.. But I am scared.. No body like my personality.. And sometimes I just wish to die..Thank you for your words. I think I'll continue to participate here.

[Jeff1943]

Saraivhdheed, you are no different to anybody else. You are here to evolve to a higher form. Clearly your life has been difficult but you have survived and will continue to survive. As the saying goes, that which does not destroy us makes us stronger. You can use that strength to restructure your life. We are all struggling at some level. We all have our cross to bear, who is without one? But nobody is given problems without being given the wherewithal to overcome them. You are no exception , believe me Saraivhdheed.

Guilt can be atoned for, we all have blood on our hands, so to speak.

Your fears are fancy maybes, they either won't materialise or you will deal with them. Of course you will. You are a strong woman, it comes across in what you write.

No need for sad thoughts, embrace the beauty and pleasures of this wonderful world we are all lucky enough to be born into.

Let others into your life, choose them carefully and they will not try and rule your life. You will still remain a free agent but do engage with others, two heads are better than one and three or more even better. Good friends are catalysts that can help you transform your life.

Why can't you complete the treatment you refer to? On this forum you will find caring people willing to help with good advice. Up to you to take it or leave it, of course.

You are most welcome here, where would you like to begin?

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

Hello Jeff that's a lovely enlightening reply yes we are here to evolve ones spirit to a higher form and to be better kinder people whilst here on earth and from our own suffering we can help others 🌟🌈

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Jeff1943]

Your words raise the morale Jeff. I can't complete the treatment because I don't have enough money and I think that my family feel shame about it..

I can't let people into my life..easily that is scary.. But I will try..

[Jeff1943 in reply to Saraivhdheed]

This problem of finding the money must occur frequently. Ask the treatment provider if they know of legitimate lending organisations who will allow you to repay over a period of time.Or ask your family to cough up the money on a promise of repayment interest free. If they refuse or feel shame because of your misfortunes then they may be family but they are not your friends. True family/friends rally round when a member encounters difficulties. You have a right to ask - continued treatment is important. Why not ask, what's to lose?

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Jeff1943]

It's a little complicated situation and I don't know how to explain it, but I'll try to continue with the treatment. ❤️

[Jeff1943 in reply to Saraivhdheed]

Health problems untreated do not improve. Money can always be earned for repayment at a later date. Health is much, much more important than money. Good luck.

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Jeff1943]

Thank you

[Hidden]

Hello I'm sorry your struggling so, hope you can continue your treatment why can't you as it's so important you get help you need, and what do you mean go back to how you was before you mean your mental health was once good or life's circumstances or both have changed, sometimes we can't go back if a life situation has changed re a break up in relationship, and we have to move on start again a new chapter we all have them, do you have family to help 🤗

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Hidden]

I'm not settled with my family because I'm going to study elsewhere. My family knows that I went to a therapist and now they thought everything was fine, But nothing is fine, and I can't tell them because I feel They're disappointed. And I can't make them pay the therapist with their feeling..

I meant that I return normal.. I hope that my begin been well..

Thank you ♥️

[Hidden in reply to Saraivhdheed]

Hi I understand that but overall there concern is your health I need to go to AA really incase I have a slip back on turning to alcohol on self medication if I'm upset or stressed I'm doing ok I've even gone off alcohol think my health anxietys too bad re my heart pounds, and my stomache with lot worrys on at mo re buying a house last stages and worry on mams health etc,I dernt tell her need AA hopefully I can go when move out I'm 59 but she thinks I'm 9🙄 you can't function properly without the help you need maby try meditation I'm heading that route again we get free therapy here but need to wait and it's like once week and not for long 💖

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Hidden]

I hope your health improves. You look like a nice woman and you deserve the best.

But I didn't understand what AA mean?

[Hidden in reply to Saraivhdheed]

Alcoholics annonimous I'm not one I can drink in moderation or not at all just if upset I may have full bottle wine not sure can now tho prob have heart attack 🙄I'm heading off out now take care 🤗

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Hidden]

I hope you can stay healthy. Thank you ❤️

[Jeff1943 in reply to Saraivhdheed]

Saraivhdheed, if it were me then I would tell the family that the therapy is NOT complete and more sessions are needed if you are to gain recovery. They need to know.

[catsrock]

I'm glad you're here. It's a hard struggle between independence and needing people in our lives. I hope you find the help you need here - it's a good group.

[Saraivhdheed in reply to catsrock]

I hope that too.. Thank you ♥️

[Irisheyes60]

Hi 👋 Saraivhdheed Sorry your going through this problems love ❤️ You say your a student? Studying away from home and family? Is there any financial support you could possibly ask for from organisations that help students. I agree with @Jeff1943 I think you should be open and honest with your family regarding your health issues maybe you will see they are not disappointed at all and they would appreciate your honesty 😉 😊 Sometimes it's our own irrational thoughts make us think people don't understand or they will be disappointed but I'm sure your parents love you and will help you love. I hope and pray 🙏 you get the right help support and advice you need to have a better life you sound like a lovely girl and intelligent woman. God bless you take care xx 😘 ❤️ xx

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Irisheyes60]

Thank you.. Irisheyes60.. I know that every body should love his son.. And I am really thank you for your advice.. And perhaps your words are true about our irrationality.But sometimes It's hard to just talk to someone who was expecting a lot from you.

[Saraivhdheed in reply to Irisheyes60]

Thank you.. Irisheyes60.. I know that every body should love his son.. And I am really thank you for your advice.. And perhaps your words are true about our irrationality.But sometimes It's hard to just talk to someone who was expecting a lot from you.