I'm drowning help

[Milliewaterlilly]

Today is a bad day. I'm really struggling and I'm hopeless. I've been dealing with crippling anxiety/depression for about 3 months and I can't find relief. I am starting to experience despersonalization and desrealisation, and I feel like I no longer know who I am. I feel I'm. losing control of my mind and my perception of myself. I'm worried that this will evolve into something more serious soon. I don't have a support system where I live and I feel extremely lonely in my feelings. I live with my brother but he dismisses what I'm going through day after day. He is extra kind with everyone else, he would spent hours speaking to our toxic aunties, etc, on the phone, but he can't stand me saying I have this mental health problem and I need him to help me with small things so I don't drown completely. He looks the other side. Comes back from work and doesn't ask how I am. I really don't know what to do but I feel like I might actually be getting worse partially due to living togethe but acting like strangers during the quite extrem situation I am in. Some days I'm so low I start to have suicidal thoughts that I have even shared with him, so he know the severity of the situation, but still doesn't show empathy and he's even implied he doesn't want to get involved in helping me. He makes me feel bad for expressing myself and talking about the reality of my situation saying things as I'm creating this problems (repeated invalidation). Please HELP, I can't do that on my own.

[Blue236]

hi!

First of all, I would like to request you not to have those suicidal thought, our life is precious and you are on this earth for a reason, just relax and try to either put your thought by writing journal or you could do the things which you really enjoy doing, didn’t ever think you are alone, because here in this platform you can see there are many others who feel lonely, I can relate to you how frustrating it is to live under the same roof like strangers but believe me you first need to love yourself, all of us need to love ourselves.

[Marysblue]

I've had family that dismiss me like that it's very frustrating. You don't say what you're doing as far as coping skills or therapy or medication. Have you talked to your doctor?I know what it's like to deal with depression and anxiety. And there can be depersonalization with that. I hope this day is better for you.

[catsrock]

Please call a hotline and get some help. You don't have to feel this way. I'm so sorry.