Relationship Anxiety

[CryptoMiner]

I’ve suffered with anxiety and depression from age 13, I’m 50 now. I’ve been taking Citalopram long term, over the years I’ve grown to manage the symptoms and side effects better however when it comes to relationship breakdown I really struggle to move on, a fear of abandonment means I always go “All in” when I meet someone I like even though in my heart of hearts I know the relationship is not healthy or has a future. I’ve spent many years being happily single. Recently I’ve come out of a relationship which I know wasn’t the forever however it’s triggered a bout of constant anxiety and fear of loneliness in future. The pain of relationship breakdown I find really hard to overcome. I’m starting to think it’s best being single? Any support, advice or thoughts to share is appreciated.

[Montana136]

Hi Crypto miner, a lot of similarities here between us. I have suffered anxiety and depression since about 13 maybe even a little earlier I'm 56 now. I definitely have abandonment issues and fear of rejection even. I have not had many relationships because when I do get involved the breakup tears me apart so deeply that I literally avoid relationships for that reason. I have been alone and not lonely before. It felt really good. But now I've raised a child who's now in college and lives with her grandmother I find myself in a deep depression missing her I feel lonely I want someone to love me and I'm afraid I'm going to die alone even. I feel very scared at times. I am single right now trying to get my depression and anxiety under control so that I can be helpful to myself. Cuz you may not to be able to be in a healthy relationship if you don't love yourself first. I go all in feet first because I want to feel loved and to love. But it's definitely not a good thing to focus all your energies on the others because relationships by nature do not always work out. I feel your pain. I recognize it I've been there. Coming here helps talking to people hearing other people's stories suggestions prayers offerings whatever feels very good. It has been feeling good for me lately. I do believe it is better be healthy and be alone than being a sick dysfunctional relationship. I don't know the nature of your relationship now but I have chosen some really bad partners. Toxic people. Sometimes I think that's all I attract. I know about feeling alone but you are not. We are here. We can't walk you through this path for you but we can hold your hand while you do. Take care of yourself try to do things even tiny little things that make you feel happy that have nothing to do with your partner. Be kind to yourself always. 🌈❤️✌️

[CryptoMiner in reply to Montana136]

Thanks for your reply, comforting to know we are not alone even though we still have to manage our symptoms. I recognise your comments on dying alone however I’m also in the same camp of better to be single than involved in a toxic relationship. I’ve not had many serious relationships however the ones I’ve had I’ve gone in feet first. I just don’t seem to learn. I know my worth however I’m guilty of giving everything to the partner in the new relationship. I need to stop doing that. I know time heals these situations too however at the beginning it feels like every minute feels like day. I’m practicing what I’ve learned in the past to cope, I just feel soo tired though 👎

[Seannari in reply to CryptoMiner]

Hey man, I'm going through something very similar, I'm not able to cope. I've been put on citalopram and I've been signed off work for two weeks. This is the worst I've felt after a breakup. I feel so alone, i have no family or friends just me.