Anxiety is always telling us whoppers. It tells us we have a brain tumour when we only have a headache. It persuades us we're going to have a heart attack when its really a few irregular heart beats. And it convinces us some great calamity will befall us if we leave the safety of our home.
None of it is true, it's all lies. But anxiety has the power to exaggerate every small fear we have by the power of ten. Things we can easily deal with become insurmountable obstacles.
Anxiety is fuelled by the fear with which we respond to every anxious thought. To every flash of first fear we add a huge helping of second fear. And so sensitive nerves are regularly flooded with more hormones of fear and stress. No wonder we end up overwhelmed, bewildered and confused.
If only we could crack the constant fear that we're going to have a stroke, lose our job or have a panic attack in public. But even when we do manage to overcome one irrational fear another soon steps in to take its place.
As has been said here so many times before the answer is always the same.
Do nothing. Stop fighting. Accept the aches, pains and strange thoughts for the moment. Anxiety on its own never killed anybody, take confidence in that fact.
Float through your daily life as normal. Practice masterly inactivity. Accept everything your sensitised nerves throw at you for the time being. Anything else just causes more tension, stress and fear. Let time pass.
You win not by the punches that you give but by the punches that you take.
Written by
Jeff1943
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Jeff its so nice to see that you’re still checking in on everyone here. I’ve been a bit quiet while I’ve been trying to regroup, but it’s always good to read your posts!
How can I tell anxiety from a true health concern? Can a person really be stuck in anxiety for close to 2 years? I mean, I wake up every morning stuck to my sheets because of sweating. My palpitations last hours, not moments.
Can anxiety wake you day after day? Really?
I keep looking for the off button. I've seen doctor, after specialist, after doctor... I am a calm, level-headed, people-person. I don't have any fear of driving, or crowds, or even cancer.
I have a strong faith and pray daily. I simply don't understand what's going on & how to get better.
Yes it can, I have suffered nearly five years now.
And its hit me with so many things and taken a lot of my life away. But all the time I've been trying ( not fighting) and slowly I understand it more and have got a little stronger, it's still there and still gets to me, but I'm still me and slowly becoming more so.
Same here. I've come to understand that there is no quick fix, and getting better is a process that will take some time. The more I learn, the stronger I feel, and after five years I'm just starting to feel like myself again.
I take anxiety " punches" everyday. Some I can deal with and rationalize and some just escalate me to no end.
Its a torcheres existence some days.
Anxiety is one of my protector parts. It prepares me for something. It tells me to get ready for something big.
When anxiety comes to me at a time of complete calm I can rationalize with it. I tell it to relax there's nothing going on, no job to do.
I have learned this technique from a therapy called IFS. It has taught me to accept my protector parts. Acknowledge them when they show up and and take inventory of why they are there.
This may be confusing. It was to me when I started this therapy. I will always be anxious. I'm convinced there's no pill in the world that will take it away. It's a part of me and my brain has to work with it.
I know we don't encourage google here. But please check out IFS therapy. It's hard to explain but it's the best therapy I've been in so far.
I'm doing the best I can. I had never heard of it either and it took many sessions to understand the concept.
But a few weeks ago I woke from a deep sleep with an anxiety attack. Nothing was happening at that moment. I kept using this skill and was able to talk myself down by realizing there was no threat. I was shocked when it worked.
If you have any questions let me know. I will try to answer them for you.
Hi Dolphin14. Are you doing IFS on your own, or with a counsellor? I have a book by Jay Earley, PhD called Self-Therapy which uses IFS. It's very powerful stuff, good for you!! I didn't get past the first couple of chapters because it was difficult doing it on my own.
I read articles in it too and in the beginning they made no sense. Now more and more is coming together. Are there any you tube things on it I wonder?
It's a difficult therapy. Start by reading the pieces about firefighters and protectors and exhiles. And build from there once you fully understand those three.
I can't imagine doing it on my own. So, you are taking on a challenge.
I'm on my second year in the therapy. We have done EMDR a work as well.
One of the exercises early on in the book is where I got stuck. It wanted you to think about two of your exiles and answer a series of questions. Every time I approached this I ended up having an intense panic attack. I haven't read the whole book yet, it ended up on the shelf, but your post has motivated me to pick it back up. Thank you.
There is a website: personal-growth-programs.com/ and online therapy options for those of us who have a hard time going out.
Thank you for posting this. I'm new in this platform trying to find some answers and your words are very encouraging. The constant worry about my health , the twitches, muscle tension in the face, and the aches that make me think something terrible is going to happen is driving me nuts, and now I found out I'm not the only one. I've tried every meditation, exercise, distraction, but it always comes back to me. How can I trick my body that nothing is wrong with me?? That nothing is going to happen, that everything is going to be fine??
Anxiety takes many forms but it is always still anxiety. Let's recap.
Anxiety disorder occurs when our nervous system reaches anxiety overload. We all have a different threshold for this, some more prone than others.
The onset is caused by worry, overwork, loss, disappointment, grief, shame, money worries, concern for others we love, toxic relationships, over stressful work situations and health worries to name just some.
When our nervous system can take no more it becomes super sensitive and starts playing up like an overloaded electric circuit.
So anxiety disorder is a perfectly normal reaction to too much stress.
In their over sensitive state our nerves start inflicting all sorts of symptoms upon us. Health anxiety, social anxiety, agoraphobia, claustrophobia, derealisation, panic attacks, you name it.
It's important to get your anxiety properly diagnosed by a doctor for reassurance - and because a small number of people can experience anxiety because of thyroid problems which can be easily corrected by medication.
Once we enter the anxiety disorder stage, every problem and minor worry is magnified by a factor of 10.
Sensitive nerves are so good at mimicking real illness that even after diagnosis by healthcare professionals, and sophisticated tests, many still believe their doctor has "missed something".
Anxiety disorder can soon become a self perpetuating phenomenon. The symptoms we experience produce fear hormones that stimulate our over sensitised nerves even further. So more symptoms are produced causing more fear causing more symptoms causing more fear - and so the vicious cycle rolls on and on.
If the bad feeling becomes overwhelming and we have work and family responsibilities then a period of respite through medication is justified. Meds have an important part to play, people should cease to demonise them, but meds cannot bring recovery. Once we stop taking them the horrors return.
Everybody who has experienced high anxiety can recover no matter how long or how severely you have suffered. No matter if your anxiety is a temporary reaction to stress or whether your low threshold to anxiety overload is inherited.
Talking therapies can be effective and so can self-help books written by people who know what they're talking about. In my opinion the greatest of these, set out by Claire Weekes several decades ago relies for recovery on the four imperatives: Face - Accept - Float - And let time pass!
This must sound silly, but every morning Ive been reading this post and miraculously I feel so much better. I started following you and you previous post are full of hope and logic, logic that my mind just started to understand one day at the time. I've seen a few therapist, and your posts have give me more peace than any session I had so far. I just wanted to thank you for giving back your knowledge and kind words for the ones in need. Thank you thank you
Anxiousabby, thank you so much for your kind words. I merely pass on the words of Claire Weekes that I first read 45 years ago. My anxiety disorder is hereditary, as I suspect is the case for many, but by applying her method I remain free from it for 95% of the time and know how to minimise it when it does return. Other people for whom anxiety and depression are not genetic can free themselves once and for all.
Anxiousabby, you say that you feel so much better for reading what I wrote. This is because you now have understanding, reassurance and hope of recovery which maybe you did not have before.
As I have written elsewhere Claire Weekes was a psychiatrist who suffered from anxiety disorder and developed a method that brought her recovery. She then devoted the rest of her life to applying her method to others through consultations, lectures, TV appearances, books and YouTube videos. She wrote many books but the first contains everything needed for recovery. In the U.S. it is titled " Hope and help for your nerves" and it is still available on Amazon both new and used for a few dollars.
It is relatively short, easy to read and many readers have the feeling that she must have known them personally. When I last looked the book was in its 44th. reprint. Over the last few years there have been 1,600 reader reviews of all her books on both the U.S. and U.K. versions of Amazon. 90% rated her Very Good or Excellent. I commend this book to you as it explains fully how Acceptance (for the moment) works. If you follow its advice there will be advances and setbacks and it is not an instant cure. I hope that it brings the relief, respite and recovery that it has brought to so many others.
Let me just say that this comment really helped me. Recently I’ve been super stressed because of school and I’ve been having anxiety all week! My stomach was hurting and I thought that I was dying but once I got this app I learned how to cope with it and help my anxiety. Thank you so much! <3
Yee_yee, Claire Weekes wrote that the stomach is the part of the body most sympathetic to anxiety. Thus IBS and stomach pains and upsets are a frequent symptom.
So who is Claire Weekes you may well ask? She was a psychiatrist who experienced anxiety disorder herself. But she devised a method that enabled her to recover. She spent the rest of her life using her method to help so many others through consultations, lectures and books.
The first she wrote explains her method in simple terms, people say they feel she knew them. It's titled 'Self help for your nerves' in the U.K. but titled 'Hope and help for your nerves' in the U.S. same book and available new or used on Amazon or ebay for just a few pounds/dollars.
You're at school and no doubt think the last thing you need is yet another book to read. Wrong! This book will set you on the path to recovery and you will remember it all your life. I have. It was written in a previous age and some of the social situations are dated but that doesn't change the message.
I leave it to you but either way I hope your stomach pains lessen and yield before too long.
How do I wake up every morning like my head is lost in a cloud, confused, weak from anxoety? I just don’t get it ... I have 4 beautiful kids a great husband food to eat a beautiful home yet I feel like I am sick all the time... the only reason I have anxoety is because I always feel unwell.... this is stopping me from living my life ... I get the weirdest feeling I can’t even describe mostly in my head,, I break out in random sweats I randomly get lightheaded ... it’s sooo bazaar
Chrisipal, have you seen your doctor to get any physical cause ruled out? If not that's the first thing to do. Doctors can tell a lot from a simple blood test, even if there's no physical problem it will give you reassurance.
First thing on waking is always a bad time for those with anxiety. After several hours of peaceful slumber we suddenly realise we have to face another day with all the bad feelings and problems. Anxiety kicks in again. Remember, when our nervous system is over-sensitised the smallest problems appear as insurmountable obstacles.
Ask yourself what caused your anxiety in the first place? Only you can answer that. If you can put your finger on it then you should neutralise the problem which may well require ruthlessness on your part. Put yourself first, this suffering must stop.
But anxiety disorder can continue long after the cause that triggered it has been resolved. It can become self-perpetuating. You get these weird symptoms which frighten you. You release fear hormones in response. These maintain the over sensitivity of your nervous system. Which causes more weird symptoms. Which causes more fear. Which causes more nervous sensitivity. Which causes more weird symptoms. And so the vicious circle continues, rolling on and on.
You have the power to break out of the vicious circle. You can recover your quiet mind. All you have to do is break the self-perpetuating cycle. To do this you must stop flooding your system with fear every 5 minutes of your day. You must learn to stop adding second fear to the flash of first fear.
You must also stop fighting this feeling that is taking over your life. Fighting only produces more tension and stress, the last thing you need. Instead learn to accept the bad feelings for the moment. Accept the weird feelings in your head. Accept the sweats. Accept the lightheadedness. But you must accept them (for the time being) utterly. Not just putting up with them. You must agree to co-exist with them, you must stop constantly testing yourself to see if the bad feelings have gone away.
If you can truly accept for the moment then you stem the flood of fear hormones which are keeping you nervously sensitised. This Acceptance method for recovery from anxiety disorder in all its forms was devised many years ago by a psychiatrist Claire Weekes. But she was a psychiatrist with a difference, she had suffered from anxiety herself and developed the Acceptance method to bring about her own recovery. Then she wrote a short book to share her method with others.
In the U.K. Claire Weekes' book is titled 'Self help for your nerves'. The self same book in the U.S. is titled 'Hope and help for your nerves'. Both books available new or used from Amazon for a few bucks/quid. The book will bring you understanding, reassurance and a road map for recovery. Whatever you decide I wish you a full and early recovery.
So happy I came across this post. I've been struggling with intrusive thoughts after a traumatizing experience. I've always had anxiety but the experience heightened it. I just need reminders that they are just thoughts that will one day go away. Some of them have gotten better and I'm the right meds.
Roses, we are allowed to have intrusive thoughts. Do not fight them, let them come, they can do you no real harm. When your anxiety disorder resolves they will pass soon enough. Just accept them for the moment, worrying about them just gives them added strength.
Yes much better, thank you. As it is inherited I will never be entirely free of it but by using Doctor Weekes' method described in thr book mentioned in a orevious post here I minimise it and am free from it 95% of the time.
In the U.S. the book is titled 'Hope and Help for your nerves' and the same book in the U.K. is titled 'Self help for your nerves' by Doctor Claire Weekes and available new or used from Amazon. The classic self help book.
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