What do you do with FEAR 😰? - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

92,625 members86,472 posts

What do you do with FEAR 😰?

Starrlight profile image
90 Replies

I try to focus in on love ❤️

Loving people and animals

And recall how people say it will be ok and not to worry about what ifs as they rarely happen

Also I recall that I’ve got through similar before

What do you think?

Written by
Starrlight profile image
Starrlight
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
90 Replies
Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003

i face it then push through it then overcome it

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toHb2003

Yes! You have such a great answer!

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply toStarrlight

thank you but i bet other people have better answers ☺️ I learned this when i was in middle school and high school

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toHb2003

It’s so true though it works and it’s a good answer very straight forward

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply toHb2003

Hb, it is a good answer. It makes no difference what others may say,

it's what works for you. :) xx

MaggieSylvie profile image
MaggieSylvie in reply toAgora1

I think it's what I've just been doing. I had a stupid motoring accident the other day and the man whose car I hit and my partner said I should not be driving - "Get your eyes tested!" Well, I will, but I'm definitely not overdue. However, am worried that my cataracts are the problem and they're not bad enough to remove. I'll just have to avoid night-driving, and that won't be too bad as the days get longer. Night time - he'll just have to order a taxi!

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMaggieSylvie

Be safe ❤️

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply toMaggieSylvie

Oh Maggie, I'm sorry to hear about the accident. I hope you

weren't injured. Night driving is precarious in itself for anyone.

This gives you a reason to stay safe and ride in style.."Your Chariot

awaits my lady" :) xx

MaggieSylvie profile image
MaggieSylvie in reply toAgora1

Thank you, Agora1. I was not hurt at all but a wheel arch needs hammering back onto the body and there are scratches to both vehicles. The 4 x 4 drove towards me onto my side of the road (to park? he said so that I could get through!) and, although the headlights were dipped, they still dazzled me so that I could not see the edge of the country road I was on. For some reason, I carried on on the left side of the road. I'm still confused but apart from that, no emotion at all!

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply toMaggieSylvie

I'm glad you are safe :) xx

MaggieSylvie profile image
MaggieSylvie in reply toAgora1

Thanks. What're you doing replying to idiots like me at this time of night?

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply toMaggieSylvie

It's a beautiful warm sunny Sunday here in Chicago lol

My day goes from morning til late night, not to worry :) xx

MaggieSylvie profile image
MaggieSylvie in reply toAgora1

It did cross my mind! I'm in UK.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMaggieSylvie

(((((((((((((((huge hug)))))))))))))))

To focus on love can only be a good thing.I fear a lot of things to much to list. As long as I keep moving I know that I'm not going to stop.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Same here I get triggered easily these days. So in moving it helps you know you won’t give up and give into fear?

in reply toStarrlight

Yeah, sorry often for me it's hard to put it into words.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

No you wrote it well. I love your answer ❤️

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

I also stop and listen to what my mind body and soul are trying to tell me since sometimes the reason behind the general type of fear is hard to understand.

b1b1b1 profile image
b1b1b1

Very good advice! It takes work, though, to put it into practice. It is the best advice in a nutshell. It is especially hard to remember that what ifs rarely happen. x

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply tob1b1b1

Thanks b1b1b1 yes true we need to practice and keep at it

Michael8072 profile image
Michael8072

Hi Starrlight

For so long I’ve always let fear control me and it always stopped me from doing things. Ive been working on so many things and this is one of them not letting that fear stop me from doing things or at least making an effort.

When ever fear enters my head and I’m trying to do something I tell myself Face Everything And Rise. That helps me to work through whatever it is.

Even so right now I’m doing something out of my comfort zone and fear is there and I find myself repeating that as a mantra along with some other mantras I use throughout the day like breathe!

Idk if that answers your question but that’s what I do whenever that fear word comes out for me.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMichael8072

Face everything and rise…

Love it. ❤️ I’m going to use it!

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply toMichael8072

Ditto my friend :) xx

KingCharly profile image
KingCharly in reply toMichael8072

TYSM ~ Fear Everything And Rise 🙏🏼💙

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

you know what it’s funny to me but sometimes I picture myself being very small to feel like my worries shrink also. Sometimes I remind myself to not be focusing so much on myself and my little problems compared to how big they could be.

Agora1 profile image
Agora1

It took me many years of cowering in the corner due to my fears.

As Michael said, with practice in going out of my comfort zone, fear no

longer has it's hold on me. I got my life back.

Starrlight, I see you going forward like I've never seen before. Whatever

it is that you're doing, keep on that path. You've got this dear :) xx

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toAgora1

Beautiful Agora, thank you, this truly means so much to me thanks for taking the time and care to tell me what you think. 😌 My therapist recently told me the same thing

Nothingnoted profile image
Nothingnoted

My sisters heart procedure. Not being able to find a job if i have to find another one

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toNothingnoted

I don’t think I responded in the right place to you. So…When is your sister’s heart procedure, Nothingnoted? I could say some prayers. I learned that what ifs are difficult but the thing about them is that what we make up in our minds that might happen usually do not actually happen.

Nothingnoted profile image
Nothingnoted in reply toStarrlight

She wont know until next week. Thank you for the prayers

bonkers65 profile image
bonkers65

Sounds like you are doing the right things. And remember Don't sweat the small stuff - and it's all small stuff.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply tobonkers65

Im not really but I try ha! I like that quote.

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic

Fear can be a friend or a foe. With anxiety disorder usually not a friend but a monster. Rise and accept it then say I will not shrink to it. I will not expand on it. It’s not easy, you just practice it every opportunity and it gets easier. XO

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toSayNOtoPanic

Awesome thank you so much for contributing here. No shrink no expand- I’ll use this

Vasiliki99 profile image
Vasiliki99 in reply toStarrlight

i use my big mind the prt that can push through n be very realor deep

in reply toSayNOtoPanic

I like this as well. I read somewhere that anger (so, while not fear, I think the two emotions are closely tied) can be good because it acts to protect you from danger. It's your defense system kicking in and saying, "hey, I've been hurt and need to work on protecting myself".

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Definitely can help protect us. I agree

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic in reply to

Yep anger is another friend or foe. Def for us to balance them out. 🙏🏻

Arymretep profile image
Arymretep

Feel the fear, and do it anyway 👍

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toArymretep

Defidently Love it!

Rachmaninov2 profile image
Rachmaninov2 in reply toArymretep

Self help book by psychologist Susan Jeffers. Read it years ago, it was helpful for me.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toRachmaninov2

That’s great 😁

What I fear the most is that others might be believing in whatever lies a manipulative person might be saying about me. This goes for a situation I'm dealing with in real life as well as what's recently transpired on here. I won't go into details for either situation. I'm just saying that this is what I fear the most. I wish I was strong enough to not let this be a fear of mine.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

I don’t know, hmmm I don’t think having fears means we are not strong. To me it means we care and are sensitive which isn’t bad but it’s definitely hard sometimes.

I’m sorry the situations have happened. If you ever feel like talking more I’m here for you. Pm any time.

❤️

in reply toStarrlight

I do appreciate it but I've talked everyone's head off about them (including mine).You're right. It isn't that I'm weak for having this. Thanks!

Isinatra profile image
Isinatra

Sometimes I do things I fear even knowing the outcome might be pretty darned awful because if I don’t, doing nothing can be worse than doing something. Or I talk to my therepist in my head if she’s not available. Sometimes I try to determine if the fear is valid or imagined. Many times fear appears without an obvious reason. That kind of fear can be debilitating and I need therapy for that. Understanding the different types of fears and what causes them is a big useful tool in my tool kit. I glue pink sequins on my tool kit.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toIsinatra

I don’t think I responded to you in the right spot … I keep doing this …I feel so off lately … ok here we go …

True acting can be a good choice, relieving some anxiety. I think that’s smart to talk to your therapist in your head, try to think what help she’d give. I try to go over facts to see like you say if valid or imagined. And I know what you mean many times the fear doesn’t have any reason attached to it. I don’t quite understand it… do you? Cool you have a tool kit. And it sounds pretty I wish I could see it 😌 Peace to you

Isinatra profile image
Isinatra in reply toStarrlight

Any spot is a good spot especially if the message is worth repeating and it is.

There’s some science/biology involved in why unfounded fears keep occurring. These are just my words and it’s simple and just a small representation of a bigger picture. Humans basically have two brains. The original, old, one is always on high alert looking for danger. It doesn’t forget because that’s its job. Example: a red car almost hit you. The old brain remembers the color of red as danger even if you don’t consciously recognize red as danger. Your memory of the incident fades, but the color red makes you very uncomfortable and you don’t know why. Something you don’t remember is affecting how you feel. Suppressed memories. But there are many other reasons a person is in a constant state of fear. Some are obvious and some should be obvious but aren’t to the person.

Peace to you…🌹

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toIsinatra

thanks for explaining . It’s so interesting.

Mrspjsmom profile image
Mrspjsmom

I think fear is a constant for some people. Fear of being alone, health scares, worrying something will happen to a loved one. Right now I won't even turn on the TV if the news is on. I listen to music or the house is quiet. There is so much hatred, violence and sad stories after a natural disaster. I've noticed the toll it takes on everyone I know. Oddly I have handled it the best. I already am sensitive and have learned ways to keep myself from getting overwhelmed by things that are going on. Keep focusing on love, kindness and hope. Fear will often be there but you have gotten through alot and are stronger than you realize. Try to be mindful and in the moment as much as you can. When something you fear becomes real take my hand. We'll get through it together.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMrspjsmom

funny I just wrote about staying in the present moment while you were writing the same.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toMrspjsmom

Thank you my beautiful friend

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

I thought of something else. Try to be in present moment …

Gillyflower18 profile image
Gillyflower18

Try to accept it’s where I am at the moment, deep breath, remind myself I’ve handled it the past.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toGillyflower18

awesomeness

Nothingnoted profile image
Nothingnoted

Really great post

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toNothingnoted

it’s ironic that right after I start this topic of fear I have now so much fear that I can’t control… well maybe I sensed it creeping up… I can’t concentrate I can’t calm down just constant worry… I’ll try tea and meditation 🧘

in reply toStarrlight

Try a long breath in and the a short top up breath both through the nose. Then breath out through the mouth . Should help you relax .

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

thanks so much …breathing

in reply toStarrlight

Sorry your going through this Starlight. Take care.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Thanks I feel soooooooo much better out of the blue… which hopefully will last… I seriously feel a huge healing taking place, You take care too✨❤️✨

Scarlett28 profile image
Scarlett28

I hide it and live in isolation, it doesn’t work well. The few people in my life don’t understand and I don’t expect them to anymore. Sorry I don’t have a more uplifting response. I wish you well.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toScarlett28

You are not alone. I wish you well too. I’m actually really really struggling right now. Going through a test in life. I definitely know how hard life can get. ❤️

Scarlett28 profile image
Scarlett28

sorry to hear this, me too. Sitting outside alone on my favorite bench after my walk but feeling virtually connected. Thanks for the response 🌼. Breathe…

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toScarlett28

(((((((((((hug)))))))))) ✨❤️✨

Beadygrl profile image
Beadygrl

I am journaling more and more for depression, anxiety and when those times when my fear is trying to take over everything. Especially when the fear is something totally irrational to anyone but myself. Sometimes writing it all out, I end it with "you are not alone and that fear and the reality of a situation are completely different".

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toBeadygrl

Oh woah that’s amazing. I think you just inspired me to restart journaling! ✨❤️✨

Jimjam97 profile image
Jimjam97

when i get anxious, i do therapeutic tapping and repeat “i am safe” over & over until i feel better.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toJimjam97

oh yes I used to use tapping … I need to get back to my tools… glad you are using self care tools! ✨❤️✨

Nothingnoted profile image
Nothingnoted in reply toJimjam97

👍

Nothingnoted profile image
Nothingnoted

I hope you feel betterr, Starlight

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toNothingnoted

aww thanks I already do feel better actually I just hope it sticks

Nothingnoted profile image
Nothingnoted

Im glad you feel. Please take care of yourself always be gentle and kind and and caring with yourself you deserve that and much more

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toNothingnoted

Awww thank you. I promise I will; you too. We do deserve everything good.

Nothingnoted profile image
Nothingnoted in reply toStarrlight

You are welcome, Starr💕

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toNothingnoted

❤️

I try to face it directly, & pray, & eventually overcome it. I stay on high alert for a while after i overcome it so it's never just one instance. It's like a whole season, basically, for me. I forgot to mention that telling myself that I've gotten over it before, & knowing i felt great just prior to the anxiety helps me weather the storm, too.

Speaking of fear, I found a very interesting article that describes my thinking exactly. "Sticky mind/thoughts" is what it's called. That phrase is new to me , but describes exactly what i go through often. It only has a small paragraph at the end on how to overcome it, but i will look up some solutions soon on my own. Maybe this can help someone else, too:

psychologytoday.com/intl/bl...

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toAnonymousUsername13

You are amazing. Thanks 🙏 😌 we so appreciate you and I will get to that link now.

Vasiliki99 profile image
Vasiliki99

I try to focus in on love ❤️

Loving people and animals

And recall how people say it will be ok and not to worry about what ifs as they rarely happen

Also I recall that I’ve got through similar before

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toVasiliki99

So awesome- I do those things too - thanks so much for those important beautiful reminders! We’ve got it. 😌

Vasiliki99 profile image
Vasiliki99 in reply toVasiliki99

I copied it from someone , but I do mean it we have to love one another to some extent , be truthful to some extent , n remember negative info is passing n arising n passing it's a very difficult works problems everywhere , it's just not another test or set of obstacles, be grateful , most of all like that person said which I copied remember you have been through it all before

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply toVasiliki99

Oh ha I just realized I had said all those things. I knew it sounded familiar.

Vasiliki99 profile image
Vasiliki99 in reply toStarrlight

Still it's true most true is that animals innocence should never been compromised and that is satan that's paying it not me I'm not doing it then I can escape sin . Jesus said follow me or you will die in sin. For the wages of sin are death n the wages of fear r good fear is good paradox

Vasiliki99 profile image
Vasiliki99 in reply toVasiliki99

N we have been through it before

Vasiliki99 profile image
Vasiliki99 in reply toVasiliki99

Again again n earth is cyclical

Hey Star, hope this finds you well and holding your dogs close to your heart. Your question was what do you fear? As someone who suffers from anxiety and panic, regardless of how much I logically understand the fight or flight syndrome, I must say that my biggest fear is fear itself. 💛

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply to

A very common cycle that we all get into :) xx

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Hi CharlotteChow!!! How are you doing today?

Oh yeah fear of fear itself and the unknown are top for people I think.

When my son was 4 he was afraid of something and a family friend told him that he “did not have to be afraid” and that has stuck with me and now my son is 15 and I still use that phrase for myself and my kids because sometimes for me it takes the fear out of fear and reminds me I have the capability to be stronger than fear in my mindset and it’s very freeing.

in reply toStarrlight

I’m doing good, thank you. I think as Mom’s we don’t want our kids to ever worry or be fearful. Perhaps we take on all their worries and fears so that they don’t have to experience these things. My sons are all in their 20’s and seem pretty fearless so far although none of them have ever experienced anxiety. I’m praying they never will. Facing fear head on is so important but also so difficult in times of high anxiety. Some days this is easier than others. Wishing you the best always. 💛

Not what you're looking for?

You may also like...

What do you think

Do people just repeat what the one eyed media tell them ! And anyone who thinks for themselves is...
gerrerd profile image

What do you do when you can't ?

What do you do, when you're trying to get use to mood stabilizers and instead you find yourself...
kindredone profile image

What do you do with your anger?

What do I do with all my pent up anger? I feel extremely worthless, inadequate, a loser, frustrated...
Dfnym profile image

Hi, what do you like? What makes you happy?(10 things)

I don't know I thought that maybe sharing things I like and make me happy and hopefully if people...

What do you do when anxious/stressed/sad etc...

Hello my beautiful people. What do you do when you need to relax and calm your mind? Let’s share! ☺️
Fatima_sh profile image

Moderation team

Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.

Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.