Really struggling this week with depression and lack of connection

[Ramon123]

Hi everyone,

Does anyone ever feel like no matter how much they try, they struggle with meaningful, long term connections? I have loving parents who are getting toward elderly--my father is staring down the road of dementia which is scary. I have my mom, my husband and my darling little girl, but no other biological family - no siblings, cousins, aunts or uncles, etc. I've started to feel really unmoored, like once my parents are gone, I'm going to have no one left in my original family and no one care about you or is there for you the way family is. I'm really struggling with feeling all alone, and I don't want my daughter to feel this way when she's my age. I also really wanted to have more kids. I'm so depressed, it's like I have grief I can't shake. Does anyone else relate to this?

[Hidden]

YES literally all the time. I was trying really hard to learn a lot more about my biological family that I met last year, and it's not working out as good as I thought it was gonna be, I used to call them everyday, but when I do they say they're busy and stressed out and got a lot of stuff going on. they tell me they will call back but never do, I have to call first. I mean they give me good advice when I talk to them about my feelings and what I'm going through and they help me get through stuff but idk anymore.

[HisChild4ever in reply to Hidden]

It's possible that your biological family also has some big struggles. Some people have problems with addictions. Some people feel hopelessness. Some people have some marital problems or financial worries, etc., etc. There are different reasons why some people are not there for us as much as we would like them to be. I know it hurts.

[HisChild4ever]

I am very sorry!

It seems that loneliness is very common even though there are many people who don't seem to have any reasons to feel lonely or don't seem to be lonely at all.

I've learned that we have to do some hard work sometimes if there are painful things in our lives that we would like changed.

For example, someone with a very serious illness like cancer, for example, has to force himself or herself to go to many medical appointments to get all the chemotherapy and/or radiation and any other treatment and attention necessary, no matter how unpleasant or hard it is to do all those things.

Sometimes for some people it is necessary to meet with a therapist regularly. Sometimes for some people it is necessary to force themselves to meet new people and to make new friends.

I struggle with loneliness too. And I was not blessed with a big loving family. I know in my heart that I have to do some things if I want to feel better and live better. But it's not that easy.

The good news is that God is able and willing to help us!

I recommend that you talk to God about how you feel. I recommend that you try to get involved in a church and also get your daughter involved too.

Support groups are also helpful. I am very glad you have reached out here!

I hope that God gives you strength and guides you and fills your heart with hope and with His love.

[09101953 in reply to HisChild4ever]

Two men looked out from prison bars -one saw the mud-the other saw the stars.

[Agora1 in reply to 09101953]

Life is how we interrupt it.. xx

[Weatherwoman in reply to 09101953]

I like that -- What if your brain is stuck in the Mud!

[HisChild4ever]

I am very sorry!

It seems that loneliness is very common even though there are many people who don't seem to have any reasons to feel lonely or don't seem to be lonely at all.

I've learned that we have to do some hard work sometimes if there are painful things in our lives that we would like changed.

For example, someone with a very serious illness like cancer, for example, has to force himself or herself to go to many medical appointments to get all the chemotherapy and/or radiation and any other treatment and attention necessary, no matter how unpleasant or hard it is to do all those things.

Sometimes for some people it is necessary to meet with a therapist regularly. Sometimes for some people it is necessary to force themselves to meet new people and to make new friends.

I struggle with loneliness too. And I was not blessed with a big loving family. I know in my heart that I have to do some things if I want to feel better and live better. But it's not that easy.

The good news is that God is able and willing to help us!

I recommend that you talk to God about how you feel. I recommend that you try to get involved in a church and also get your daughter involved too.

Support groups are also helpful. I am very glad you have reached out here!

I hope that God gives you strength and guides you and fills your heart with hope and with His love.

[Hidden]

You sound like a great mother! Concentrate on that for now. Teach her everything that really matters to you and things that you think will make her future easier for her. This is what I’m focusing on with my kids. I too, am facing the fact that my parents will be gone soon as well. They are elderly also. The logical side of me knows that everyone experiences this at some point in their life but that doesn’t necessarily give me any comfort. I’m trying to live and prepare myself for these “days to come” but yes, it’s very difficult to face. I don’t have many answers for you on facing the fact that are loved ones will be soon gone, but I believe we must tell them we love them now, let them know how much they meant through out our lives, and that will will miss them dearly when they are gone. This is one thing that I don’t want to have any regrets about.

Always here and completely understand how you feel.🙏❤️

[Ramon123 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much KellyKay - is it ok if I send you a PM?