I'm always getting ghosted

[EndUser13]

I feel like I am always getting ghosted. I live a very isolated life and 99.5% of my interactions with other people are online. I genuinely try to be a nice guy and I have definitely cultivated the ability to be a good listener over the years. I like people, I like conversing over a wide variety of topics and sharing experiences. I even like polite debate with people who have opposing views (I think this can help us grow).

I have too often seen people on this forum or other platforms mention that they feel lonely, particularly disabled people (I see it with a lot of people who have anxiety disorders). You'd think that would make a place like this a good option to find someone to chat with... and I mean in a friendly way like a penpal; I was talking to a woman on here who suddenly felt the need to inform me that she is married and not interested in anything other than a chatty kind of friendship. I didn't say anything to make her feel otherwise and was a bit offended that I got lumped into some stereotype- this doesn't mean I don't understand. A lot of men can be horndogs and lack tact if they think there's a ghost of a chance they could get some ego-stroking attention.

I have tried not to be too self-critical, but I have looked at the situation fairly and I don't see what I've ever done that I've had so many people ghost me. I would prefer someone would be bluntly honest and say "I just don't like chatting with you" then vanish or stop talking to me for no apparent reason.

When you get burned in social situations (or feel left out as I do) it makes it that much harder to try and put yourself out there again. Still, I do make an effort from time to time, in whatever ways I can... but living online I feel limited and always feeling ignored... it hurts, it truly does hurt! I've read all kinds of medical papers on what isolation does to people. I try not to read those kinds of papers so much anymore. I look for the silver linings in life. I try to be considerate and entertaining in my own way... but it still hurts to be left out when unfortunate circumstances have limited what my life looks like already.

I'm at a loss.

[HelpMe86]

I feel you....I'm very to myself most of my social interaction is also online but I game ...it seems like I'm more open that way it's hard for me to actually socialize outside of a party chat so DO NOT FEEL ALONE....be free to message me anytime

[Hb2003]

hey your not alone 🙏 i get ghosted sometimes too

[CL3V3R-G1RL]

Yeah you would think with so many people on here from every part of the globe who say they feel alone would be open to chat. But sadly not always like that.

I, too, feel alone at times. All my friends are busy with their lives. I don't have really anybody to talk to about video games, science, movies etc.

I wished folks who have gotten better and felt they didn't need this place no more would let some of us know. Ghosting does hurt.

[EndUser13]

It's a distinct possibility but I really don't think so. The world takes all sorts

[Hidden in reply to EndUser13]

Just my humble opinion. I’m a good judge of character though!

[EndUser13 in reply to Hidden]

I'd like to think I am too, it's a knack people who've been through trauma pick up out of necessity. Of course, we can't expect everyone to always appreciate our own standards, life would be boring if we were all the same.

[Hidden in reply to EndUser13]

Ditto

[Hidden]

You hit the nail on the coffin: women have to be explicit about their intentions or men will contrive their own ideas.

I wouldn't take her telling you she just wants to be friends too personally. It's just a precaution.

Also, yes, getting ghosted hurts a lot, and I'm sorry you've gone through that. I'm not sure if you are disabled, but I hope you're able to find events and groups outdoors that you can join. Best of luck ☮️❣️

[EndUser13 in reply to Hidden]

I'm not going to take this too personally, I feel like you didn't actually read what I wrote, but that's somewhat understandable, I know I can be long-winded.