Here’s a copy of a letter I sent to a friend who is still suffering in hospital, she saved my life by phoning the police.
Just lately I’ve decided to make some radical changes to my lifestyle, I cant undo things that involve others so instead of dwelling on the impossible, I’m making moves, which I hope will guide me to whatever it is I’m looking for. After I did the North East Skinny Dip, I saw an ad on their Facebook page for a naked paint fight, the organiser Jane has been hosting these events for women only for a long time, she had been thinking of holding a mixed paint fight for a long time, seeing the fun everyone had at the skinny dip, she decided now was the time.
Sunday night off I went into Newcastle, parked up and waited for the doors to open, my anxiety was through the roof, I wanted to drive back home and forget all about it, I didn’t and I’m so pleased I didn’t. Nina was at the door to greet us, checked us off her list (there was 20 of us), and we went up to the 2nd floor, it was a large office block, Jane had rented a couple of rooms for the event.We were told to wear something comfortable, a dressing gown or similar because, although it was going to be a naked paint fight, there was things she wanted us to do dressed. I wore a pair of Elf pyjamas (don’t know where they came from) and nothing else. We all sat in a circle in front of a mirror facing the centre, one by one we introduced ourselves and gave a brief description of why we were there, when it was my turn I told the group I’d attempted suicide, obviously failed because a friend contacted the police etc. We had to turn and face the person next to you and just look in their eyes (I was sat next to a young guy), it was weird us both looking into each others eyes and saying nothing, I found that really difficult, then we had to place our right hands on each other’s heart, that was only for a few minutes, it really was a strange but uplifting experience! Jane told us all to stand and face our mirrors, looking at ourselves, then told us to say ‘I love you’, sounds weird but it wasn’t, then she just told us to get naked, so everyone did just that. Again she told us to look into the mirror at our naked bodies, at that point I felt like I was not only baring my body but also my soul, after a period of time, not sure how long, she said turn and face the middle of the circle, at that point we were all looking at each other’s naked bodies. The women on my left was easily in her 70’s and I would guess the youngest person there was in her late 20’s, no one batted an eyelid, we just stood there, looking at each other. Jane then ushered us all into a side room that was all covered up in large sheets of polythene, with saw dust and wood shavings on the floor, in the corner was a large table full of small bottles of paint, we had to grab a couple of bottles in each hand and simply threw it over everyone, how fun that was, everyone was just a mess, it was stupid childish fun, as we were fighting with the paint we were also hugging each other, I bet you’ve never hugged anyone when you’re both covered in paint, it’s a slippy, wonderful experience, we all hugged each other, blokes hugged blokes too, it really was wonderful. I know I once told you I’d stripped off on a nudist beach and ex wife went ballistic, you said you could never do that, but when we were all together in this room, listening to Janes quiet voice, it just felt natural to do as she instructed, everyone was told beforehand that they didn’t need to be naked, but everyone did. Once we started throwing the paint around, you were no longer naked, you were ‘dressed’ in paint, lots of us took pics on our phones, I used my camera, so several people and couples asked me to take their photo, it was a mad bit of silly fun, what a stress reliever, a lot of people are asking for another ‘session’, me included. The thing ended at about 9.00 pm, we all made new friends, everyone left very happy, I hung back to help Jane and her friend Nina to clean up, another bloke Martin returned and also helped, Martin and Nina left when everything was just about done, just as well I stayed back because Jane couldn’t fit everything into her car, so we loaded my car up too, dropped all the stuff off at Janes house and drove home, it was now nearly 1.00 am, god knows what time Jane and Nina would have gotten finished without the help of Martin and myself. While I we were cleaning up, Jane asked about my suicide attempt, I told her everything, obviously I had to mention you phoning the police etc. Earlier she sent me a link, it’s for you, I’m not entirely certain what it is, I’ll not send it to you yet, if that’s ok, I’ll let all this sink in first. All I ask is please consider this, try not to just write it off, I honestly think I’ve found what I’m looking for in life.
Here’s something Jane wrote herself…….Getting together to be naked together is one thing but Jane from Your Wild Truth events is taking being free in our bodies to a whole new level. What Jane is bringing is not only really really good silly fun but it’s a healing experience too. It’s an invitation to see ourselves and each other like the incredible works of art the Jane knows we all are.
Take care
Stew
I would recommend trying something along these lines, I’ve had the counselling, chats with the crisis team etc, but this was something totally different.
I'm not embarrassed to be naked in front of other people, what you see is ME, if this is a step too far for some, you could wear a bathing suit or similar.
I have photos I can share, I’m not sure if I can post them here, if I’m allowed to I will, perhaps a moderator can get in touch about that.
One final thing, there was a married couple at this event, the lady was in tears whilst redressing, apparently her and her husband were having a bad spell, they’d never done anything together for years, this event had brought them together again, getting naked may push your boundaries, but being naked, silly and having childish fun has a lot to offer.
Take care ❤️
Alternative to anxiety medications? 
Alternative treatment CES
Therapy, Not good enough and Practicing the power of positivity
Triggered by therapy 
Anxiety healing tools. Alternative methods
