Depression or boredom

[Lookingforhope20100]

Am I depressed or just bored with life? A question I find myself asking a lot. But either answer the result is the same. I get bored of doing the little things that used to make me happy and then I want to freakout or go on a rampage, and the days when I can't just freak out and let out all my feelings I want to hurt myself or get drunk or smoke a joint anything to drown out what I'm feeling, and lately I've been having a lot of feelings and most of the time I don’t even want to get out of bed so really it doesn’t matter what the answer is depression, boredom both a song I sing a lot one leading to another spining around until I lash out and finally let the downward spiral take over does anyone else feel this way or am I the only one? How much longer can I hade the fact that I want to spiral out of control and ruin all the good things I have going for me ruin the life I'm building for myself? How much longer can I snip at my boyfriend before he gets mad? All good questions both with no answer....

Sorry for the depressing post guys just feeling my feelings

[101315]

hard to say .. i can not diagnose you with depression but I believe that if you are asking you must have some real sadness with your situation. This may be the cause of the boredom or it could be a result.

[Lookingforhope20100 in reply to 101315]

I've actually already been diagnosed with depression and bipolar disorder. The problem is I can't tell the difference between being depressed and being bored but both lead to sadness

[101315 in reply to Lookingforhope20100]

very accurate .. i think i also struggle with telling the difference. Someone much wiser than I am suggested to learn new things and try different approaches to the things we already know. If our brains are kept busy, the boredom does not set in. If we are not bored, we may not feel sad so frequently.

[Midori]

In the last couple of weeks you have done so much and now you seem to have come to a halt in progress. This happens to all of us on this journey; we proceed in fits and starts, ups and downs.

Time to see your doctor and tell him how you are feeling.

You have escaped the abusive household. Good! There is no need to feel guilty over that, as you did no wrong. It's your family's problem, not yours!

Don't retire to bed or I'll have to give you my pep talk about what happens to your bones and muscles when you are inactive and non excercising. Not to mention the vitamin deficiencies. Long story short, the less you excercise, the more you will seize up, until you won't have any strength or muscle tone.

We all go down this rabbit hole from time to time, and the answer is to find something to do which depends completely on you, whether it's pets, or children, something that truly needs You.

Just as I had to be strong for my kids when I was widowed, so you have to be strong for your Daughter. You can do this.

Cheers. Midori

[designguy]

It's a fair question to ask yourself but it sounds like you may be dealing with suppressed anger and rage which is one of the main causes of depression. A lot of us were punished and shamed for expressing anger as kids and learned to suppress it, I know that was my situation. Allowing myself to feel, vent and process the anger really helped. i would beat a pillow with a plastic bat and mentally and emotionally focus on who or what I was angry about and pound away. I would also go outside with a sledge hammer and beat the crap out of rocks and again mentally and emotionally focusing on who or what I was angry about. I would also at night write it out on paper, not worrying about spelling or what it looked like. Over time the repressed anger was drained and I started feeling much better.