Why I’m Here

Because I feel like I struggle with depression and most recently my anxiety isn’t controlable. I tried explaining to my husband that I need help and he just says I need to get together and just be happy, grateful and positive. I truly struggle with not always being happy. My husband told me that I’m just ungrateful for everything I have. Tonight I’m pretty sure I was gaslighted into thinking I’m a terrible person. I was told I need to go to therapy, which my husband has always said no to. And to also get a job, although my husband has said I don’t need to work. I’ve been a sahm since my daughter was born 3 years ago. I’m always confused because my surroundings are always unpredictable. I can’t ever keep up with the changing requests of my husband. I feel hopeless and lost. Although I think I’m somewhat ok since this time I have feel like ending it all. Tonight I just feel tired.

[Agora1]

Welcome home FeelingUnsure22...This is a safe comforting place to come to whereothers understand what you are feeling and truly care.

I respect the fact that you are a stay at home mom but I also feel you need a little time

away from being a mom and an on call wife. Your self esteem and confidence in yourself

needs to be built from within. I totally agree that therapy would help give your direction

as well as put you on a healthy path in going forward.

I'm happy that you took a big step forward into coming on this site. No longer will you

stay stuck in a cycle of unending depression and fear. We learn from each other as we

see that we are no longer alone with our struggles. Please stay safe and know that

we care xx

[Hidden in reply to Agora1]

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond! It truly means a lot! Your kindness has gone a long way! 🙂

[Agora1 in reply to Hidden]

xx

[Tcbabe]

I would say if you feel you need help then that’s exactly what you should do. Sounds like it would be a good ideal if you find

The right person to talk to.

If anything we are not designed to handle a lot of stress and be able to think clear.

Sometimes we just have to trust who created us and put it in his hands.

By the way I like your zebra pic good choice

[Hidden in reply to Tcbabe]

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond! I will definitely be seeking mental health help. I do trust in the Lord. Sometimes it can be difficult to focus on Him when my husband doesn’t let off enough to run to the Lord. Sometimes I just feel hopeless.

[hypercat54]

Hi nice to meet you. My first thoughts on reading your post is that your husband is a bit of a control freak and has set himself up as your boss with you as his 'possession'. I see red flags here.

Your needs as just as important as his and he has no right to just say 'No you can't do that' when you make a decision. He sees himself as king of the castle and there is no room for debate. In a healthy relationship you discuss things between you, it's not one taking charge and laying the law down. No wonder you are so confused and all at sea.

I think you are being gaslighted from what you have said. Look up this term online and also narcissism and see what you think.

Never give up your autonomy or power.

[HisChild4ever]

I am sorry you suffer from depression and struggle with anxiety too! In my opinion, it is really bad that your husband does not support you unconditionally. His words, unfortunately, are common things some people say to people who suffer from depression.

Depression is a condition that many people do not understand or see as an illness, but it is very important to get a lot of support and understanding and experts have explained that therapy benefits a lot people who struggle with mental illnesses, so I am very glad you have made the decision to seek help.

Also, marital counseling is something that can be very helpful for all of us who are married and I would recommend it even if you have to do it without your husband.

There are mental health specialists who have gotten training and education to provide couples counseling too, but I hope that you are able to get all the help you need even if you need to meet with two different therapists.

I can understand that it is very hard to be in your place and I am sorry about that! But I would like to encourage you and remind you that God cares about you a lot and He always wants to listen to you and help you.

None of us is alone. God is always near! Please keep yourself safe! You matter a lot to God!