HELLO ALL!! NICE TO BE HERE. DEPRESSED BUT ANXIOUS AT SAME TIME. DON'T KNOW HOW CAN FEEL BOTH BUT DO FEEL IT OFTEN.

[Michelle420]

Hi. This is my first post and just typing this is causing me anxiety!! I have never done anything like this before. My therapist says I'm so isolated ( and I agree) I cannot work due to many medical issues... physical... mental and emotional. I have zero social life and my family just doesn't understand me. One person will actually make fun of me when I'm hyperventilating into a paper bag having a massive panic attack! !I'm just looking for a safe space with other people that have challenges like me..Of course as I go through things like this...I feel so alone and thatt I'm the only one trying to cope with such things. I know that's logically not true but chatting with others sure would help!Thank you!!! 🙂

[Fearoffear]

Welcome to the forum!! All of us here understand what you are going through and this is a safe place. I have general anxiety disorder I've been living with it for about 14 years now. I was agoraphobic for about 5 years. I have disabled adult children I take care of so I am pretty isolated too. I had a major panic attack about 5 days ago that I called the new 998 number and I'm trying for a new program that the therapist comes to me to start. I am also on a lifestyle change for the last 6 months which I have lost 51 pounds. Anything you want to ask just fire away and I or someone will answer you. This heat is not my friend so I am trying anything to keep my mind off the heat subject. Hope you find our community helpful.

[Michelle420 in reply to Fearoffear]

Thank you so much for your reply!! It seems I have been suffering from panic attacks and general anxiety disorder for about as long as you have. Depression & PTSD longer than that. I was agoraphobic for awhile although not as long as 5 years. That must have been so difficult for you. I understand though. The panic attacks caused me to stop driving altogether. It's pretty easy to have basically everything delivered these days. WOW!! It's amazing that you're struggling with all of this while caring for your adult disabled children!! I'm disabled and I have enough trouble taking care of myself and my cat. And whatever lifestyle change you've made to lose 51 pounds... kudos to you!! Congratulations... I know how difficult that is. You should be very proud of yourself!! I'll leave you with this quote..."Whether you think you can or think you can't... you're right." Henry Ford

[Fearoffear in reply to Michelle420]

I can relate to all of that I've had PTSD and depression since I was a child and I'm old now, haha. The driving thing yes I gave up driving when I was having vision problems with my anxiety (nothing wrong with my eyes). Do you take meds? I am not medicated any longer I left daily Ativan behind after weaning for a year last year. I take magnesium and it seems to help with the anxiety, not panic attacks though. I am basically alone here to talk to myself as my boys do their own thing I just need to help every so often during the day and night. I meditate at least 10 minutes three times a day and it helps to put me in a relaxed state. I'm thinking about doing crochet again but I've said it for months and haven't followed through. I use apps like dare and insight timer when times are rough on me. I used to have a lot of problems staying present and grounded but a new technique I am trying is walking around in my house counting my steps to ground me. I have health anxiety and I am trying not to ask others to validate my questions and feelings about health issues. Sorry I'm going on but I just want you to know you are not alone in any of your thoughts or feelings we all struggle in our own ways and coming here and talking or writing about it gets it out and see we aren't as alone as we think. I love the quote and I put it in my notes of inspiration. Gentle hugs to you Michelle420.

[Michelle420 in reply to Fearoffear]

Hello again!! Yes…I do take meds for depression, panic attacks and my physical medical problem but I know there is no “magic pill” for anything!! Most days, I wish I could flush all the darn pills down the toilet!! You’re brave to go off of all meds. Good for you!! My meds have been altered or changed over the years but still…been so long since I have not been on anything, I literally can’t remember!! I’ve tried meditation…my mind always wanders. Like when I go to to sleep at night…I can’t turn my brain off. I’m a worrier. Always have been and put myself last on the list every time!! I have never heard of the apps you mentioned…I will have to look into them. I used to make jewelry but can’t anymore. Got severe arthritis in one hand. Now starting to get in other(dominant hand) Ughh!! I would love to make jewelry again but that’s out. Therapist and I are trying to come up with some type of hobby for me. Hope you have a peaceful night!!

[Michelle420 in reply to Fearoffear]

Good morning 🌞 Fearoffear!! How are you doing? I just wanted to send an extra special thank you for letting me know about the apps…Dare and Insight Timer. I LOVE 💕 them!! They are so very helpful…. I wish that I knew about these sooner!! Oh well…I have them now and I am truly grateful that the apps were created…and grateful to you for sharing them with me!! The one I use most often is in Dare…especially the SOS 🆘 button when I’m having a full blown panic attack…hyperventilating!! It really helps calm me down to the point of being able to fight through it and come out on the other side!! Thanks again 🙏

[Fearoffear in reply to Michelle420]

Oh my goodness yes. Dare is my middle of the night wake up panic app. His voice is so calming. Insight is more of use to get my daily meditation in or if I want to work on mindfulness. I'm glad you liked the apps I find that if I get there fast enough it ends the panic just a little sooner each time. I'm glad you are doing better. Gentle hugs 🫂

[Michelle420 in reply to Fearoffear]

Hello Fearoffear...middle of the night and insomnia takes over yet again. Ughh!! I take sleep medicine but being in pain 24/7 so often my pain cancels out sleep medicine. Yes...I agree with the Dare app....he has a very calming voice. I do have to admit that the first time that I used SOS....and he said to say aloud "I'm excited by this fee!ing" over and over...I thought it was a bit strange!! 😆 But I said ok...I'll play along.and it helped tremendously!! Yes...Insight Timer is better for meditation. That's going to take a lot of practice on my part. I have tried meditation in the past but my mind wanders. Still does. I suppose that I'll get better at it I time. Hope you are ok.

[Fearoffear in reply to Michelle420]

Same here can't sleep, but I need to. Lol I'm exhausted and my eyes are on fire. Just going through a rough patch, but it will get better somehow. My mind wanders too and that's ok as long as in the background it still makes you feel relaxed. I got some bad cramps and I'm trying to think them away because it's way too hot for a heating pad. Try some Michael Sealy guided bedtime his voice is dreamy and his background music is tranquil I'm usually out twenty minutes tops. I can't tonight or I would but I got my son's feeding tube started late today so I have to listen in my sleep for it to go off so I can flush it. Hope my suggestion helps. Gentle hugs 🫂

[Michelle420 in reply to Fearoffear]

Hey again. I'm still here. I can't imagine what its like caring for your disabled sons. I could be wrong but it sounds like you're doing it all on your own. You are really strong. Your sons are lucky to have you. Too hot for a heating pad? You don't have AC? I can't imagine life without AC. I don't sweat...it's very dangerous. If I'm in the heat...I will literally just faint!! I've already met my quota of falls for 2022!! I truly wish you can get some sleep. But I understand your situation. I will try your suggestion. Thank you!! ((((Hugs back to you))))) 😴

[Michelle420 in reply to Michelle420]

Good morning Fearoffear!! I tried what you said and it really helped!! I got in at least a few hours of sleep. I'm sure you did not. Thank you for sharing once again!! You are a wealth of knowledge!! And I apologize. Last post...I stated that I understand your situation. I was overtired. I could NOT possibly understand the situation that you deal with on a daily basis. What I meant was that I have empathy and sympathy for you and cannot even imagine what it's like to have nights like last night. I am sure every day is a struggle for all 3 of you. I'm sure that you're very tired today but I wish you the best day possible. 🤗

[Needtovent]

This is a safe place and welcome. You are not alone. Someone will get back to you typically within an hour - sometime sooner. Anxiety is tough and it takes work to manage it. You should get some tips here.

[Michelle420 in reply to Needtovent]

Hello and thank you so much for your reply!! Thank you for the information as well. Have a lovely night!!

[Kainan]

Hey welcome, I think that being here and introducing yourself you have already taken a step forward out of isolation. Keep reaching out

[Michelle420 in reply to Kainan]

Hello Kainan!! Thank you so much for your reply!! It is greatly appreciated!! Yes…I’m glad I did take this first step and post today for the first time. I figure it could really help and I have nothing to lose!! Have a peaceful night!!

[Dot_]

Hi Michelle420, hope you're doing ok with evrry little step you can make. Just being able to share as you are is a good step forward. It might be hard to socialize in person, but this is a good step toward accomplishing that. With time and acceptance, hopefully you can lead a life that fills you with happiness. If you ever need to talk. Feel free to reach out.

[Michelle420 in reply to Dot_]

Hello Dot_ Thank you so very much for your reply!! It is greatly appreciated!! I’m really glad that I did this today and post. I had been overthinking it before I sent the first post. I am my own worst critic. But…a work in progress. I believe we all are. Hope you have a peaceful night!!

[EndUser13]

Hello and welcome! 🙂

[Michelle420 in reply to EndUser13]

Hello and thank you for your reply!! I’m really glad that I did this today. It was the bright spot in an otherwise bad day. Have a peaceful night!!

[RemySue]

Definitely not alone! Write as often as you need to

[Michelle420 in reply to RemySue]

Hello RemySue!! Thank you for your response and welcoming!! I'm so very glad that I joined!!🙂

[NickieLane]

Today is my first day . Super anxious! I wrote so much depressing stuff on my profile. I feel it’s too much negativity.

[Michelle420]

Hi Ifallis!! Thank you for your reply and thank you for the radio info. I will absolutely check that out!! I most definitely am really happy that I joined here. I have received much helpful information!! Hopefully, I will be able to share some as well. Hope you're having a better Monday than me. Ughh!! Thanks again 🙂

[lola568]

we are all here for you. sending huggs ♥️