I went back recently to old bad habits. It embarrasses me. A good life is all about habits and I’m screwing up. I can’t even remember how long ago it was I was doing well and felt confident in myself but it was not very long ago thank God so maybe I’ll bounce back quickly I do think this time of year triggers me and I become weak because of the date of my brother killing himself just happened. So I took that as a reason to sabotage myself. I’ve made myself sick and not taking good care of myself. I take better care of my kids than myself. They are most important but I know if I don’t take care of myself then I am not as much there for them as I could be.
I was just talking with a friend on the phone who I thought I could speak my mind to and she cut me off and even though I think she got busy and although I was trying to be positive and not complaining it was hard not to and as well as hoping I’d get to tell her something I never got the chance to say to anyone, it wasn’t meant to be told. It seems like everyone is really struggling right now. There’s nowhere to turn but my therapist who is on vacation. And there’s here. I love here. Thanks for listening. And how are you doing? I need hope. I used to be Muslim hell I used to be Catholic most of my life and organized religion doesn’t seem to work for me but I do participate in a spiritual group of mostly Buddhist s but of all beliefs on Sundays. I wish I could get closer to God. I feel like everyone He and others are upset at me. Just really feels like I’m trying my best but it seems not good enough. I’m rarely ever good enough for me. But it’s ok cause I’m working on it.
Hey trying your best is all we can do , eh. Let’s see ourselves as super hero’s... what would your power be?
Mine- spending time contemplating life and thinking in a way that leads to inspiration no matter how dark I become and I have such determination to rise up again into the light.
What is your super power? I’d love to hear about you.
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Starrlight
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Sorry you just experienced such a sad anniversary. They are the worst regardless of how much time has passed. I try to make them better by doing something like donating to a charity in my loved ones name. If I can't afford to do that I grab a few things from the cupboard for the food pantry.
I was raised Catholic and have tried attending many different churches but have also given up on organized religion. Will send a message regarding that.
My superpower is empathy. Other people must sense it because complete strangers often approach me and start talking. Even though it annoys my family I stop and listen. We all have problems and need to be heard
I also think you have another superpower. You are a Mom!
Yes! I’m a good mom too just like you but lately haven’t felt it. Yes your superpower brings people to you and I’m happy that you listen. Thank you for being empathetic towards me today. I’m falling into a hole. I’m afraid I’ll die and go to hell. Pm me any time
Hi Starlight, Thanks for sharing. It sounds like you are focusing on extending grace to yourself and that is definitely a good way to take care of yourself.
If you have not already done so, you can ask God to reveal Himself to you and strengthen and encourage you.
My super power would be having the ability to make life quieter outside of my home. I would make vehicles not have any sound that went beyond 50 feet.
My superpower is Optism, I am nearly always full of hope that a situation will work out well in the end. Of course it doesn't always, but I am seldom without hope.
The death of a sibling is awful and painful, I'm very sorry to hear about this. When in comes to grief I only know that time is a great healer.
Like you I've studied many different religions and practices. My partner is Muslim and I'd say I'm agnostic, I hope you can find strength with what ever you choose.
My superpower would be the ability to manipulate matter! I'd have loads of fun playing with different elements. I'd build things like towns and forests I'd make all the leaves different colours and shapes. I'd mess around making new animals. I'd form stars and galaxies. I also think it would be great to be able to change my appearance, be really tall for one day and tiny the next!
I am what I call an a la carte Catholic. I seldom go to mass anymore, but I follow mass online quite often streamed from my local church. I also like to visit a church when it's quiet and sometimes light a candle. I find the church very peaceful at those times and take solace from it.
Yes, would like to feel that right now.Your posts are great to get us thinking Starrlight
My sincere condolences on the loss of your brother. That is so hard. I lost my mother back in August. The hospice social worker told me that grief is like a rock you carry around in your pocket. While it's always with you, it changes in size. Sometimes it's a boulder (overwhelming and unbearable) and sometimes it's a pebble (more bearable).
Love the title!!! Cracks me up. It's like saying boy, do I sure feel like shit, but hey...let's be positive about this😂
My superhero power is living in my head. This is no easy task, and that is why it's my superhero power. Shh! Don't tell anyone.
One last thing: you are enough. Your best is enough. Since you mention God, I'll say that God is in no way upset with you. He loves you and delights in you! He's rooting for you! Think of Him as your own personal cheerleader.
Ha I have the same super power but I find it difficult. My head goes crazy with too much often. I’m so sorry about your mom. ❤️ Thanks for what you said about God. It truly is such a helpful thing to think of instead of an angry God.
My condolences to you and your family about your brother. I unfortunately know how you feel about that. I lost my brother back in 2012 It's a unfortunate club to be a part of. I say my brother died of broken heart syndrome. He was only 45.I too would like a closer relationship with God. I was baptized Pentecost. My dad I have no idea what his religious background is I know my mom is Catholic. But we were never raised in a religious household. It was pretty much up to us what we wanted to do about it. I'm no theologian. I have no idea what or who God is. I consider myself to be an agnostic. Cuz I just don't know. With all the things that has happened to me. I wish I could find some comfort. I'm nervous all the damn time. I'm anxious all the time. Just like you there was a time where I had my life together. And it seems like in a fleeting moment that was taken away from me. Who knew a small amount of hormones can do that to a person? I'm scared that I'll never be the way I used to be. I don't want to be stuck like this forever.
If I had a superpower, I guess mine will be that I'm very compassionate towards others. Or maybe even a good listener. I rather listen to other people's problems than my own. Maybe because I'm sick of my own. I do like to help people when I can. It pains me when I can't help.
You are right now using those superpowers. Thank you. I’m so sorry about your brother too. My brother was 20. It will be okay. We will make it we just have to keep up hope and trust the process we can try praying to God or not maybe going into nature we may feel spiritually connected. Or by meditating. Thanks for listening. Thanks for being here right now. Let’s focus on the present and I believe this doing so can help the panic. I feel my heart beat too fast much of the time. I become scared. But really fear is only fear it is nothing more what I mean is there is nothing to fear really the unknown happens there’s nothing to do or not do we just try our best and walk along the road that leads us all to where we need to be.That’s how I see it... I picture you walking up the road with me.
Yup that's all we can do really. Just keep moving forward. Time doesn't wait. Just keeps going. All we can do is just try a little better every day. I'm happy to have you with me on that trail, partner 🤠
Hello Starr. I'm like you, I find it easier to take care of others than myself. A lifetime habit that's hard to break.
My superpower is the library inside my head. Poe shares space with Dickens, Conan Doyle, Lewis Carroll, Henry James... All clamoring for attention, ready at a moment's notice.
Which leads my to my offering. I find comfort in this, paging through, and finding what I need. Maybe it'll have something for you? Yes or no, that's okay.
Sorry I missed this I will spend some time reading when I can concentrate I do appreciate you thanks so much. I love you and your heart and your mind, all beautiful ❤️
Life is too short to waste. God puts us through this path for a reason. Embrace your god and be thankful of for the good things. Have gratitude for the bed you have for warm house you get to stay in. The online services you have to express yourself through. Put boundaries in your thoughts. Live for the moment. Don’t dwell on the past. Life goes on. Try to think positive. We know our weaknesses but yet we let ourselves go through them. Take control. Good luck.
Everything you say is true. I am so grateful right now. And I am in a peaceful and happy place. It just took me some work to get there today. I freaked out over some things that scared me but I got my stuff under control.
I do believe God put so us on a path for a reason and I believe my God is your God and that there are many paths to Him.
I typically worry about the future. But at this moment am feeling all is well and complete the way it is. I will never get this moment back, so I enjoy it.
I like that you say life goes on and put boundaries on my thoughts.
You definitely have a superpower you are a helper. Thank you. I hope you are well.
My super power is being kind and empathetic it doesn’t matter who you are what religion you believe in your a amazing human being ☺️ I’m so sorry about the anniversary lots of hugs and support ❤️
at least you recognized that you are "relapsing" and are taking steps to get back to where you were...i struggle with this.....daily.....trying not to revert back to old ways...not sure what I'd say my superpower is....because sometimes being an empath can hurt
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Rock bottom. Rare personality type. 
Just Feeling (more) Miserable
Learning to accept the loneliness
One Step at a time 
