Responses with anxiety

[Bpirgy08]

I feel like my anxiety always has me in defensive mode. It makes me extra sensitive and if someone says something little that I find offensive I immediately go and defend myself. Later I think about what they said and they were not trying to be offensive at all but the damage is already done. Does anyone else have this problem? How do you bite your tongue?

[AdamFCastillo31]

Ohh, that's really sad. But I would like to know what treatment method you choose to deal with your anxiety. My case was a bit different than yours yes I did have a hard time but counseling/Psychotherapy helped me a lot to get over it. It may vary from individual to individual, in my opinion, you should consult a medical professional to get help according to your situation. I am sure you will be fine in the coming time.

Best of luck.

[autumnmarie5]

Hey there!! You are not alone! I thought I was the only one who struggled with this. It's not like I am easily offended, I just get more sensitive and irritable when I'm going through an attack. I hate it, I just react quicker to something when i'm under the "anxious attack" so I completely understand!!!

[Bpirgy08 in reply to autumnmarie5]

I'm learning how to be apologetic. thanks for letting me know I'm not alone!!

[designguy]

Yes, anxiety can make you defensive and hypervigilant. What helped me was realizing how much repressed anger and emotions I had and working with a therapist to process and release them. I would even get a sledge hammer and eye protection and go outside and pound big rocks to release the anger. I would visualize who ever or what ever I was angry about on the rocks and pound away. I also did this in the therapists office on pillows. All this helped a lot. With therapy I also investigated where my anxiety came from and what my story was. I grew up in an emotionally repressed household and was punished and shamed for being angry and even over-emotional. I was also bullied in school and developed social anxiety which made me hypervigilant and defensive. There wasn't a therapist who specialized in treating SA near me at the time so I did an online program that helped me understand how distorted my thinking was about myself, that everything wasn't about me or an attack on me and that I didn't need to be defensive. I learned that most people are absorbed in their own stuff and not even paying attention to me. i also realized how little real self-worth and compassion I had for myself and how important it is for my own healing and wholeness.

Anymore I try to pause before I react and give myself time to consider how to respond or even walk away from someone or something that feels confrontational. With anxiety i lived in my head so much that now I consciously try to live from my heart and react from that. Some days and situations are easier than others but I accept that I am a work in progress.

[Bella_lee]

Hi @Bpirgy08 I know you're not alone in feeling this way, I can also sometimes be oversensitive to what people say to me especially if I think they are being critical of me.

Some things that I do that helps me is praying and meditating before I start my day to build my self up which also gives me an inner peace so that I don't react hastily when I'm interacting with people.

Other days I declare positive affirmations about myself that helps to build my self esteem which I find quite beneficial in biting my tongue as I'm in a much better frame of mind emotionally.

I believe If I'm confident in who I am, then I'm not easily bothered most days lol.

Hope this is helpful.

[Blueruth]

Have you looked at emotional intelligence books, media, etc? There are tests too. I don’t feel like I deal with major anxiety unless there is some sort of external force but the antidepressant I take may have made a difference. I say maybe because it could also be that I’m in a work environment that works really well. I find corporate environments to be unnecessarily competitive and ruthless. that does give me anxiety. Working at home helps me too. I do not have to respond immediately. That has also trained me to slow down in person. Part of that EI training.