Spiraling down

[RemySue]

I'm really struggling today. I know it will pass and so much in my life is good, but I'm so tired of fighting anxiety and depression. It's a constant battle and I'm so tired.

[Hidden]

Hi. I'm sorry it's so hard. I am glad to hear that you know it will pass. I hear you loud and clear about it being tiresome and a constant battle. Do you have a good therapist?

[RemySue in reply to Hidden]

I have a wonderful therapist, It's just so frustrating-I feel like I'm making progress then it comes back full force. I've had several triggers the past 6 months and I understand why, and know what's triggering this is totally legitimate (my son and his family are moving to the other side of the US) but I'm so tired

[Hidden in reply to RemySue]

Glad to hear you have a good therapist! I think that makes so much difference.I wrote a post a few days ago that you might enjoy. It's a Norwegian poem that I translated to English so I could share it. The poet uses the analogy of goung up stairs to describe the battles with mental health (and life in geral). Click on my avatar and go to the "Poem" post.

It's very insightful of you to know your triggers. Not everyone does.

[tiredswedge]

I've been in that place more times than I care to remember. Its when I get to that point that I start thinking "there has to be something I haven't tried yet". I start surfing the web. I might not find anything new, but it focuses my head and I start thinking of things that worked before. I slowly form a plan of action and that gives me the strength to put one foot in front of the other. I may never run, but I will keep moving forward and so will you.

[Adlon57]

Yes it's the perpetual tiredness, that gets me, waiting for the 'good' moments, questioning myself, why do I feel 'good' now? It NEVER lasts, then what's my agenda for tomorrow, [a liver examination!] back to earth, almost a piece of me welcoming me back to being my normal moaning groaning usual self [good boy! you're back to being a groaner🥴🙄] There never seems to be a light at the end of a tunnel as you say "It's a constant battle and I'm so tired. "

[TailWags]

I feel the same way. We seem to have lot in common. Age, gender, country... Anyhow, i get tired too. When I was younger I had endometriosis. I had heavy, long periods with delightful pain. This ruled my life for years and years dealing with it. After ending up in the ER in pain, I finally got a dr that listened. He gave me a shot of lupron to put me into temporary menopause. A new world opened up for me. I was free of the hassle, pain and misery. I thought this must be what it is like to be male and able to plan your day and activities around what you wanted to do. Not how your body felt or what it might do. It was like being reborn. Life was almost effortless in comparison. After a while I got ablated and havent had to deal with it since. Now i am so tired of fighting everyday with depression and anxiety. I am tired. I think how much easier and more fun and more productive life would be without D and A. Thats my fantasy.

Of course there are bad days and better days. But it is always there.

I am trying to learn better ways to handle it and mindfulness based stress reduction, rx and talk therapy help. And every once in a while I find a gem. Knowing there are others out there helps. I know I may be miserable, but I also know there are better days ahead. It's just a matter of making it thru the crappy ones. It isnt fun. But it is possible. And there is always hope for better times. Like cancer patients, there maybe a cure any day. Wouldnt want to miss that.