To have a commtied relationship. The traits that I want from one guy is, to be repecful, caring, intellegent, listing to what i have to say even if disagree about something , helpful, common interested , gamer, faithful. and also has a learning disabties. yes these year and last yeer has be very much hard to get stage of getting into a realtionshiop or been on date. only has one dates canled so far. has one date be canled for 22022 . last year of 2021 didn't nothing happen but has texting a lot on social to one that didn't even bothering anythinganything. always was making up exuse after exuse. What I am doing wrong that I can never seem to get near. my older sister already got back with her ex boyfriend.
Why do I have been very much struggli... - Anxiety and Depre...
Why do I have been very much struggling with trying to date and getting into a new relationship but not yet seem to happen in 2022 Yet?
22 Replies
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I remember when I was younger, fifty years ago people would say I was trying to hard. Relationships are like waiting for a bus, you wait for a bus for ages then two of them arrive together. You also have high expectations, I generally found se how the relationship developes over time you may be surprised what develops over a given time. I generally found if I went on a date I would always allow about four dates at least to work out the persons ways and expectations, remember many people will be very much like you watching and waiting to see what developes before they make a tranche of decisions before they decide what you are about ?
I always found dancing was a good way of meeting similar people, it allowed you to consider the person without going onto a date. People are more relaxed However there are other things you could try and meet like minded people. Initially try not to take things to serious as well
BOB
in reply to
I don't think I have very high or highexpectations,I am mosty dispoint since i had 9 ex boyfriend and none that part one has not be good . trying to find guys that simlar is more hard since my mum only want me date men with a learning disabities only. or i never date agian.
in reply to
What part of the world do you live in ?
Here in the West you choose your own Partner, Disabled or not, it is not in your best interests to restrict your future Life expectations.
Are you Chronically Disabled, I am and have Never really listened to my family who I should date or go out with?.
It is not up to your Parents, you follow the footpath disabled or not to that number one person. Why does She feel you should be with a disabled person for a Life Partner. I married a healthy Woman who looks after my needs and expectations. We all should be looking for that person that rings our bells and has all the same interests that will keep you both happy with the same ideas as eachother
BOB
in reply to
My mum is the promblem being too overprocective . she only wants me to date men with a learning disabties . not disabities . that also no go . do you have listen to me this time , my mum always want to control my dating life .
in reply to
?Your Mother may be overprotective, although if of age you have those decisions to make for yourself, protecting you is counterproductive.
Just because you would be same, Learning Disabilities does not mean you need to follow that pathway your Mother is dictating to you
BOB
in reply to
that not it . my mum said control my dating and i can't change my mind . is her way or no way .
in reply to
Does your Mental Health Team have any input with your Mother.One problem I can see if your future Partner has the same problem this will affect your the running of your home. Also Relationship between you and your disabled Partner
Have you discussed this with your Doctor or Mental Health Team. Do they discuss your condition with your Mother.
Is it the Doctor or Mental Health Team dictating your possible future
What are the reasons why are they dictating your future
BOB
in reply to
My doctor does not know about the issue but knows about my Learning disability . Not the same thing as that. I had a hormonal issue , heavy periods . I only had the blood test once . I tried tranexamic-acid . I didn't work when I was on the bc pill . I haven't therapy since they made it even worse. I got kicked out of it and got told not go to threapy again . see diffenent docters . nothing .
in reply to
Hello Gwen
You need to discuss with your Doctor, the Withdrawal of therapy and anything ekse that has unsettked you. It can be problematic when we do not know what has probably been discussed with other departments last has helped you in the past. Your Mothers attitude also needs to be approached when it comes down to interferrence in your personal life especially when you have gone through a sexual relationship before.
Write out a list, of all your concerns and take that to your Doctor, this will help you get more out of your appointment, it may take you some time although it will really help
BOB
in reply to
the isusse with my docters are both from NHS and there some threapis i got banned from not thinking the right way . the person talk to me like i was a baby or teenage becuase of my learning disabties . is also was from NHS . My mum also refuse to get privet heath care . i could i would . my docters are both women and threapises was a women . i has better experince with some men threapies . didn't reallly work for me .
in reply to
Our Surgery is full of Ladies with one Male GP Like you I am having problems, I am going blind and they say my imagination is making matters worse as a see things that are not there. What has happened, why do you feel uncomfortable with your Surgery, With COVID sad to say I feel treatment is a privalidge dictated by a 10 min appointment that has come back to your time is up, close the door when you go out !!!
Your condition can cause problems in surgery do they not allow for your Mental Health ?
BOB
in reply to
they seem very argny each time i ask a qestion or ask to help . the NHS is the only docters that can see but huge waiting list to even to go to the docters . some of them did get some things wrongs, i never onces has a male docter . is always has be female docter . I also has same isusse with some yonger women too . they didn't help with my isusse with having some heavy period before i got on pill and i still get heavy fake period on the pill still .
in reply to
The problem is the NHS GP is the same one running a possible private practice, so your appointment may be slightly less abrupt in their interacction with you. Your appointment time may be the same or most times it may last for twenty mins.
I have been waiting for an appointment for near on three weeks now and hopefully I will be seen sometime next week, I am holding my breath I find Covid has made GPs less understanding and new appointment systems are are making everyone including patients less patient and understanding. If you are having problems with your Period you need to make that appointment and hopefully they will have you checked over. Make that list to show what is wrong, this will help you not forget what you feel is wrong, this way you will get more out of your appointment
BOB
in reply to
I have already tried to talk about my period problems. Only one doctor did a blood test . The same doctor did put me on the tranexamic but still made it even heavier than before . I went to a different doctor and got put on a birth control pill. I have not seen the doctor since then as part of having the flujab and covid booster jab. I seem to be on the heavy side even if I am on the birth control pill . Yet she is coming to my older sister's. She always gets better doctors. They listen to her more than me and she already also has issues with her period . I even talked and asked about it too with Granny and it was a very similar issuse with when she did have period . I also stop taking the tranexamic.
in reply to
Gwen
My wife always attends the Surgery now with me. I have problems with my short term memory, so I can forget what has been discussed in surgery.. I am also going blind and now again my Wife will always try and attend the Eye Hospital with me as well. I have an appointment on Friday and this Doctor prefers that my Wife comes into the Surgery with me so the questions I have are answered
I am also waiting to see the pensiors mental health team, they will expect to see my Wife with me. I had a review with the pysio three weeks ago and the same applied, there has been no problems regarding this so I would advise you take someone with you.
Some Surgeries will actually have a Staff Member to be with you at your appointments, although you need to confirm that as some surgeries may not be keen on that idea.
BOB
in reply to
I am go with my mum to the doctors and the vaccine centre . i all the covid19 vaccine and the boster . i am not sure if a they wil only let faimly at two at the time . is always very long waiting list . i tell my mum about my isusse .
in reply to
I have injections every twelve weeks for my physical Disabilities.
Soon get used to them
BOB
in reply to
I not onces i got anything part from flu jab and the covid19 vaccine and boster that all they do nothing else but kept senting me back home
You will attract the right one. It happens when your not looking for it.
The harder you look for someone the harder it will become, relax and you will find that number one fellah
BOB
It is really difficult to find decent men out there. Meet lots of men, but only date them if they are interested in making something more serious with you. Also, guard your heart. Don't put your whole self out there until you find the right man.
in reply to CoderMom
most of guy that i met in real life already taken . so i have to tried disabled dating . that only met one guy from it
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