This is insane! There are no proper therapists in my country

[Against_the_current]

I told my therapist i'm really not okay. And things aren't working. I told her my sympthoms are really bad. She made me feel worse about mom. She gave me even more ideas to panic. And she deadass told me "to get a boyfriend/girlfriend". I didn't like her before but now even more. I asked her If she's joking. Balkan mental health is terrible. I heard the story of some guy that tried to suicide by hanging himself on a tree. His father found him hanged there and married him (arranged marriage). I'm always feeling worse after sessions and now i just can't take that. My brain is going to explode. Bad i don't have money, espessially for a foreign therapist. I feel like my issues are too bad. I'm unsavable. I give up. I be bad entering therapy but after talking to her i feel like yeeting myself out of the window (not gonna hang myself in order to not get married lol). But i don't even have money for a bulgarian therapist (like 20 dollars) and how can i get a foreign whose 1 session is my mom's whole salary? Also on card. I can't have her card for this. She's a single mom caring about us. And i'm too mentally ill to work. Probably i'm just panicing right now. But this is insane. For hours i talked to her about my complex issues and she just says that. This is not ethical. I'm a psychology student, i know this isn't ethical. But i don't think i will go far. I've tried other therapists here and they did even worse things that i don't even want to describe because i'm already upset.

P. S. I'm gonna be okay, i'm sorry for my language but this is insane. I'm a person in pain who just wants to get better so i'm not a burden to my family and myself and can percieve my dream to help others. But i can't become a psychologist, If i'm struggling so much. It's just anger towards society and it's issues. And it's justified. And we need more people angry. As Halsey said "I'm tired and angry but someone should be". Feelings aren't bad. Even my pain has wisdom in it. And this damn society just wants to "distract" me, numb me, gaslight me. "In a sick society you can't trust the people who are okay". "And all the people say "You can't wake up this is not a dream, you're part of a mashine, you're not a human being". Tbh i don't stand Halsey anymore, she's annoying with that stupid baby.

[Rafiki11]

Wow. That’s the kind of advice you’d expect from an annoying aunt, not from a therapist!! I’m so sorry you’re suffering and the person who is supposed to help made it worse. That’s not okay.

[Mumma_h]

I know this post is a little late. Haven’t been on here much lately,as was doing ok but feeling the need to atm . I’ve been in same position for myself and a loved one , and it made me feel like I was going mad ! I understand! It’s not just you . My son has Tourette’s syndrome and you’d think with such an obvious ill ness there’d be help , but bizarrely to me , there hasn’t been any !! Been everywhere from the children’s hospital to private drs to just about every hospital in my city but NO ONE has taken the time to actually help , usually just given a referral to someone else who gives another referral and he just falls through the cracks every time( he’s an adult now so even harder to find someone who cares ). I’ve even pleaded with drs to just take a minute to look at his case and lead us in the right direction. I actually find it really bizarre and don’t get it and feel like I’m going crazy sometimes, I just seriously don’t get it !! So you aren’t the only one . Also I suffered extreme depression and I didn’t get much help from therapists , I too felt worse afterwards, and I was left thinking what’s wrong with me , I can’t even get therapy right ! I really hope you find someone who gets you and has compassion. I never did , but somehow, miraculously, I can actually say I’m doing better, so whatever happens believe in yourself, and know that you WILL get better and be happy again.

[Against_the_current in reply to Mumma_h]

Thanks. Same. Since little they're always refeeing someone else who refers someone else and so. Hope you both find healing

[Mumma_h]

I hope you do too . Just a therapist to do their job properly would be sufficient. I hope you find healing too 💕