Hello. Since I was a child that I remember that I was always sad and lonely. However, in 2021 I reached a level of loneliness that I simply cannot deal with. I don't have friends. I barely have family. I feel like that there's something wrong with me. Why doesn't anyone call me to go out or to do something in the afternoon? Why does everyone have a group of friends that engages in all of this fun activities that I want to do but I don't have no one to even talk to?
I realized that I've been sad for so long that people prevent from talking to me because the conversation gets sad at some point. Nobody wants to listen. Everyone just wants to be in this high level of happiness even though it's not quite real, idk. I feel hopeless. I feel ashamed and embarrassed about myself. I want to give so much but I don't have no one to give it to. Im not even able to read a book. I only feel sadness, lonelyness and despair.
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I hear you. I feel the same way. I wonder why my family does not wish to spend any time together. I wonder why the people I called my friends have stopped calling me, stopped answering, stopped being interested in being my friend. It's easy to see the world and feel so left out that you feel 100% alone. But you are not alone. I am here feeling the same way you are. <3
Well first not everyone has a group of friends to od fun things with. Many people just prefer one to one instead. More introverted types tend to.
Second have you ever had friends? I wonder if you somehow missed out on learning the social rules of how to make them. This is something you can teach yourself as I did.
What you need to do is find groups of people at work, school or wherever and watch and learn how they interact. Study other people especially the popular ones and you will learn in time.
Make this your mission and put all your energy into it.
Thank you so much for your advice. I've been trying to do that for the past 6/7 years. It is really hard because I tend to lean on toxic people that end up mistreating me. When I was I child I didn't learn how to socialize and it really shows right now. I tend to go out of my comfort zone to meet new people but lately with covid it is really hard. Do you know any online app that is good?
I am glad this helped you a bit. You don't need online as you will never learn that way.
Is it possible to go to therapy as that will point you in the right direction. Also have a look at this link as this could ring a bell with you as it did me.
I would like to suggest that you join a site like meetup.com to meet people with similar interest. If you have it in you, volunteer at a charity. Not only will it boost your interpersonal skills but the joy and confidence of giving of yourself for nothing is very empowering.
I can only tell you what helps me. 45-60 minutes of daily cardio exercise to produce endorphins that battle your anxiety and depression. Take a 5 minute pure cold shower, it produces a calm happy effect, read up on it . Some people are just not bubbly and happy all the time. I have found friends hard to stay in touch with. Because life and goals and family are first
Thank you for your reply! I actually do exercise and take cold showers. That good feeling last just for a while, unfortunatly. You are 100% right. Most people can get very focused on their lives. Im trying to be more like that but my goals is all i have, and besides from that, i dont have anything else...
I am very sorry about how you have felt for so long! It's so wonderful that you exercise because that helps physically and mentally! I have experienced loneliness too and I know that it's hard and painful. Someone else already suggested therapy and I would like to recommend it to you because I know it can help a lot. It can be hard to do all it takes to find a therapist or a counselor. But some things are necessary in life if we want things in our lives to improve. Do you think you would be able to attend a church and get involved there? Volunteering is a good idea too and it benefits us. Finding friends is not always easy, but if you get out of your house often and surround yourself with people, it can be easier to form relationships. I hope everything in your life improves a lot. May God bless you!
Thank you so much for your reply! It is really hard to find a therapist. I don't have the money to do it right now but I know it's my best option I love volunteering, your absolutely right!
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I love volunteering, your absolutely right! 
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