Tired of work

[Gillyflower18]

I’m so tired of working. If I don’t work I fall into severe depression. Physically I’m so tired and worn out I feel near collapse but I know if I let up mentally I’ll fall into the pit again. I take meds bit at a very low dose as I’m very sensitive to them. I’d just like to be able to relax like other people. I never enjoy myself at social meetings and can’t wait to leave. I don’t fit in anywhere and I hate pretending to be “one of the gang”. My life is so far removed from that of the people I work with that they would never understand. I feel like I’m always playing a part. Does anyone identify with this? How do you deal with it.

[Roxylox]

I do. I do have my husband and family.I hide away at home as much as possible.

Hobbies like music, singing aloud at home, crosswords, podcasts, fast walking with headphones all help. Journalling is also good.

Only work one day a week now.

Most of my former workmates didn't understand me, l did try to get to know them, some badly misjudged me and even mocked me. I left that job.

Have little human interaction in the other one. Suits me better.

Going to try and get online work, but guided by an employment agency.

[hypercat54 in reply to Roxylox]

Many don't have that choice Roxy. If they live alone or even if they don't they usually have to work and arrange to have company outside of work. I am glad you are able to do this though.

[Gillyflower18 in reply to Roxylox]

Thanks for your kind reply. I do some of the things you mentioned already but I’m usually too exhausted for anything like walking when I get home. It’s all I can do to keep the garden from being overrun by weeds. I live alone so no one but me to talk to.

[Roxylox]

That is tough, but I suppose at least you have no one making demands on you to do stuff

[Gillyflower18 in reply to Roxylox]

Not at home yet hank heavens! Work is enough demands for me.

[Midori]

I have felt like that in the past; I'm not the most social of people, either. I walk my own walk, and do my own thing. I don't need to be part of the regular folks. I don't stay in though. I meet people on my terms, in parks, in cafes, etc. somewhere I can get away from them if I need to.

Do you have any hobbies? Sometimes an interest can become very absorbing, and take your mind off stuff.

Meditation, or soothing music might help you relax, without sparking the depression, I think that you are physically exhausting yourself so as not to have to think. Does your brain work overtime?

Perhaps it is time to see your doctor and get some answers from him.

Cheers, Midori

[Gillyflower18 in reply to Midori]

Thanks Mindori ! Yes I am under the care of a physician and a therapist. Because I am so sensitive to meds they both say I need to structure my life more. Work is my structure but it’s exhausting. I’m in my seventies and still can’t relax like other people! I am a ruminator for sure and am learning mindfulness to break that cycle but it’s still tough. It’s not that I don’t want people in my life I just never learned how to be with others. I’m still working through the mess I grew up in which played a large part in all this. I very much understand you when you say you need to be able to get away! After a couple of hours I usually need to escape too. It’s an immense relief when I drive away. But then I start beating myself up for not fitting in. It’s a vicious cycle!

[Midori in reply to Gillyflower18]

I take a different tack on keeping busy. I'm 73, and amongst other things I have Fibromyalgia, which is exhausting too. My pain is under control (except for a knee which is breaking up under the strain,) and I find my best course is to do a bit, rest a bit, and repeat. Takes forever, but I get there in the end!

As an only child, I found I related better to older folk rather than those of my own age. Makes it difficult as now they have pretty much all dropped off the twig!

Cheers, Midori