AM I BEING PETTY ?

[sweetiepye]

Today , for Father's Day, our daughter , her husband, and three kids took my husband out for a baseball game and dinner . I wasn't included. I am hurt and my husband says I'm over reacting . Well he would wouldn't he, He got asked. What do you guys think ?

[hypercat54]

Don't know how I would feel to be honest. Maybe they just wanted some time alone with him? I can see why you are upset though.

[Agora1]

Hi sweetiepye, I think the answer might lie in what they did for you

on Mother's Day. Or did you cook for the family? I'm sorry xx

[sweetiepye in reply to Agora1]

For Mother's Day they dropped by with a store credit card for my gift and left after a short time as they were on their way else where. They never really treat me badly but there is always a difference. Complaining about it makes me feel small.

[Agora1 in reply to sweetiepye]

Don't feel small. I would have felt hurt as well.

But we can't let it eat away at ourselves. It is what it is,

nothing against you.

Whenever my daughter asks what I want for my birthday or Christmas,

I tell her just get me Lottery Scratch offs. I now get what I really need and

that is a big winner xx

Life does go on

[sweetiepye in reply to Agora1]

That's funny we give our adult children scratch offs for their birthdays. They don't need anything but the day seems to need some acknowledgement.

[Agora1 in reply to sweetiepye]

Do you think they'd share the big winnings?? lol xx

[sweetiepye in reply to Agora1]

A good question. I think they would have good intentions , but their spouses would have some input and that might change things . I would be happy if I could get a good family vacation out of it.My Father died in a car accident and my Mother receives a huge settlement. It was life changing. Once people found out about it relatives came out of the very air. Everyone wanted a share or a loan. I was nine at the time so it seems like I've always known how money affects people. It's really very interesting .

[Dolphin14 in reply to sweetiepye]

People seem to show up when $ is involved and things can get ugly. This always makes me sad 🐬

[Agora1 in reply to sweetiepye]

Sad but true how money can be the root of all evil. xx

[TruckersWife4life]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. I know they wanted to spend time with him but a invite would have been nice, even if you didn't want to go. It's just nice to be asked.

[sweetiepye in reply to TruckersWife4life]

Exactly what I thought.

[Dolphin14]

I think they should have included you. I think those days should be spent as a family. After all you did play a role in your husband being the father of your children.

I'm sorry you were left out. Those things hurt.

❤️🐬

[sweetiepye in reply to Dolphin14]

Thank you

[Kaydwg]

I would be hurt too. But at the same time I have similar interactions with my parents. My parents are very different personalities and I like to spend time with them separately. My time with dad means getting out and doing something. He likes that. My mom is less likely to want to do anything new or different. For your situation - do you like baseball? Maybe they just didn’t think you would want to come. Or they wanted to allow the kids to have a special moment with grandpa.

[sweetiepye in reply to Kaydwg]

I do like baseball and I am quite willing to spend time with family doing things they are interested in . I'm pretty sure my daughter knows this. I really feel she didn't think about this very much and I don't think the intention was to hurt me. The problem is it happens frequently and it hurt s my feelings .I haven't mentioned this to any one and I'm not sure I will.

[Kaydwg in reply to sweetiepye]

I can understand why it would hurt your feelings. And you are probably right - she is probably not aware that it hurts your feelings. Otherwise she might make an effort to invite you or explain why she didn’t.

[Shezza1]

If you was my mother I would of included you like i would of include my father on mothers day. Even if it was just to watch a film together and gave you a little present afterwards. I dont think you're overreacting

[sweetiepye in reply to Shezza1]

Thank you, that is very sweet . Watching a movie together would have been nice.

[ongaku666]

Your feelings are completely valid and I am sorry you felt left out, it's not very nice.

However we really don't know anything about your relationship with your family, and the fact you don't seem to want to talk to your daughter about it means there's some sort of communication issue. If you tried to approach that, rather than criticising her choices (which at the end of the day are still her own to make) perhaps you could find out why she does this. Bear in mind however that if you'd have such a conversation, you'd need to be open to listen and not be triggered by criticism, otherwise you might as well accept that that's her preference and she's entitled to that.

[sweetiepye in reply to ongaku666]

You make some very valid points. I don't disagree with anything you said. I'm not ready to take this on though. I need to prioritize my issues.

[Veteran250]

Dear Sweetiepye, if my children invite me out for whatever reason, my wife gets included or I don’t go, and I believe your husband should have had the same attitude!

I think you have every right to feel aggrieved, It saddens me you were treated that way?

[sweetiepye in reply to Veteran250]

Your wife is a lucky woman.

[Hidden]

Usually, I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt but in your case, the fact that you weren't even asked seems extremely rude to me and I would probably be pretty unhappy about it too

[Shpammy]

Well Sweetiepye, same thing happened to me. Step-kids took my husband out to dinner. Husband asked if I was going, but, like you, I wasn’t invited, so I declined and said my knee hurt. I’ve been with my husband for over 10 years, but Mother’s Day isn’t for me either. They have one already. My birthday was last weekend. My husband ordered some gifts for me and said one was from them, which was late. My husband ordered it, paid for it, had it delivered to our house and says it was from them … smh. To their credit, they picked up a pack of Oreos to put with the gift he got me. No card. I’m lucky to get a text from them usually on my birthday. I’m just sad. I couldn’t have any kids because he was divorced and we couldn’t afford the child support as it was. They aren’t my kids. They aren’t the kids I would have raised. Still, I’ve done so much for them … for nothing. They don’t appreciate me. It’s sad. I’m sad. I haven’t been on this app in years and the first post I saw was yours. I feel you. ✋😕💕

[sweetiepye in reply to Shpammy]

I talked to my daughter this evening, and things are good. I told her how hurt I was. She apologized and said it should never have happened. She didn't think I would be interested in baseball. not thinking I would just like hanging with the grandkids.

[Hidden]

To be honest, they should have taken you as well. I find the whole thing, not considering you is a bit rich. There may be a reason why the did not ask you.PLEASE EXPLAIN. You could always work out a way where you can prove a point and that would make then think things out

We never go out alone, we are always together, we are as one. We even go to the Dentist together

BOB