I need to learn to let go of the past

[Sadmama]

I woke up early on a Saturday. As usual my mind goes racing to all the things that hurt me. Why do I do this? Why can’t I just let go of the pain? All the things that I have pushed down so hard come racing back. How do I stop?

[Itzallgood1]

That is a hard thing to get rid of, is the past. We need to focus more to the future and what it can bring us. We need to give ourselves challenges that we can try to attain and hopefully that will help us forget the past.

[SeakingLight]

I've found I can let the past go more easily when I have closure with the things that hurt me. That doesn't always mean those that cause pain say sorry, but it does means I communicate to them or someone in a kind way what happened. With my PTSD EMDR really helped. I've been able to let go of the abuse I experienced. I have to face the pain instead of pushing it down. I also am a Christian and believe that God can help me overcome my pain through Christ's atonement. I'm sorry to hear you're feeling pain.

[The-Good-Mentalist]

That is a very good question. I have exactly the same problem of waking up with painful thoughts that rushes back. Allright so yesterday I did some reserch about how that happenes and how to stop thoughts that come rushing back and came upon something very interesting. That process is actually quite common for any person suffering from depression. It is coined "rumination" referring to the "rumen"(noun) of cows that they belch up and chew over and over again and swollow. After they swollow the whole process starts over and over and yet again over. Ok now I'm not here to talk about cows, but rather the application to how people tend to think over bad experiences and situations and mentally visualises a whole bunch of different outcomes. It doesn't change the reality. It only end up making people feel worse, but yet people still unknowingly spend hours and hours doing it. It's a very toxic habit. Very few people even know they are doing it. Now, I've spesifically done reserch regarding your issue, and found an author that actually speaks about your situation in depth, backed by scientific reserch, and how to overcome that poisoning mindset. The book is called "The depression cure" by Martin Taylor. Read it. If you seriously want to stop that, read that book. I hope you overcome that. I'm actively following his advice myself. Hope this helps

😀👍

[Sadmama in reply to The-Good-Mentalist]

Thank you. I will. I heard a wonderful quote about the bad thoughts being a runaway train. You have to put a caboose at the end of a but or and and change the narrative. I am alone but I am alive. Thank you for caring enough to research the issue. It means so much.

[The-Good-Mentalist in reply to Sadmama]

I can gurantee you that you'll find many answers to many questions. I thank you instead. You are very brave to be able to follow my advise without even knowing if it even going to work. Well done.

[Sadmama in reply to The-Good-Mentalist]

Who knows what will work until you try? At least I can be open to possibilities. Thank you

[silentdreamer20 in reply to The-Good-Mentalist]

I am fascinated by this. I do this all the time! I am currently looking for the book you mentioned.