puzzled between 2 mindsets

[PeaceArie]

Hello All,

These days, i am still feeling some depression and anxiety. I feel sometimes it is getting worse. I feel bad and guilty so much. My internal critic is so loud these days.

The reason behind this is many things. I have something stressing me out. That i need to pick up some letter and i am afraid it is something bad from the government.

I sleep a lot and i feel very guilty afterwards because i don't make my to do list. I feel guilty of taking the time of having a good breakfast, of cooking of making sports and of making yoga.

I want to stop smoking and coffee but it is so hard on me. Sometimes i levitate between taking it gradually and stopping it at once. Some time i tell myself be compassionate and don't be hard on yourself and other times i say it's ok to be compassionate with your health and decide to stop it. I am hesitating a lot between these 2 thoughts.

I wish to have a healthy lifestyle because i wish to live happy. I am not satisfied with my lifestyle and i hate myself for having so much bad habits. I am afraid also on my health and I get paranoia a lot that something bad will happen to me as a heart disease or cancer.

The good thing is that I am aware of all these thoughts and I master them. I am strong enough to be aware of all these thoughts. I am a strong person I think.

I need to be kinder on myself but i don't know how. I want to be self compassionate and having a love to myself. I want to learn that.

I love you all in these difficult time. Take care of yourself.

Peace Aries

[Trying1268]

It sounds like you are on the right track. One thing you need to remember is that nothing happens overnight. You need to take steps to accomplish any task.

Its not about being compassionate to yourself. Its about setting goals and realizing them one step at a time. That way you will not and can not be critical of yourself. Being critical of yourself does not help to accomplish anything, Understanding why is the key.

Simple example quitting smoking= smoke one less cigarette a day. (I know it is way harder than that however, lets just use the analogy for now.)

Start with a number amount of cigarettes per day(example 10 per day) then minus one each day. Then ask yourself, did I smoke one less today then yesterday? If the answer is yes then you accomplished your goal. You are on your way to being healthier.

If the answer is no, then you did not accomplish your goal. It is time to analyze why. Ask yourself why? was 9 not enough for you, do you need to stay at only 10 per day a bit longer?

I think you get the simple point I am trying to make. Set goals and accomplish them. Period. Taking compassion out of the equation makes it much simpler. Emotions have a way of getting in the way when it comes to goals.

I hope this helps. Be well.

[Hidden]

As I was reading ur post I just wanted to say to u...STOP..BREATHE my friend.😊Reread the bottom of ur post..because u WILL read..Im strong,I'm aware....Those r strong words of a person helping themself ❤Give urself some love on all that n surround urself with people that can get what ur going thru,so u can grow n be,have what u want in life.

[BluePeppermint]

My doctor put me on generic Wellbutrin several years ago, and then I lost my desire to keep smoking. However, I smoke a cigarette a day for years and years. Just one. Every day. Otherwise, I know the patch helps. My ex needed to quit smoking and just couldn't. The patch took the edge off. I never got hooked on coffee, it makes me nuts, so I can offer anything about that.