Hi everyone,
Haven’t posted on here in a long time. I’m so done with life and please don’t tell me to call the hotline since I’m not going to act on it I just want the thoughts to go away. I’m tired of being depressed. Everyone is saying I’m crazy because I didn’t accuse a guy of rape until recently and I was 14 when it happened and he was like 20! So done
I hear you there. Depression really stinks!
I had criminal act abuse and neglect and didn’t say anything. Sometimes you can make situation worse or you can’t cope with As long as you try to live your life to best ok
I think you are a heroine. It took great courage for you to bring this child molester to justice. Anyone can understand why you didn't feel able to make the accusation at the time. But you waited and when you were ready you took revenge on him for all womankind as he surely assaulted others.
I can see that this traumatic attack has left many scars on your mind. I wish I could wave a wand and dispel them. But I ask you to remember that the guilt was all his not yours. You are clean and must never think otherwise.
Do not let this terrible experience destroy your future as it may have harmed your past.
The world needs more people like you not one less.
Many of us think ourselves unworthy of almost anything good, for our own screwed up reasons. Until we can do things for ourselves, that make us feel happy, I don't think we can have a better outlook on life.
Love thy self! Be selfish and do things you enjoy, maybe alone or with a friend. Video chat, take a hike, play aboard game via video chat (not sure about that one), Tai Chi, QiGong, exercise, go running, paint, draw, write, buy some play-do, play music, buy plants and enliven your abode.......
Think about what makes you happy. Others who have commentary about your life, can find a new hobby. Maybe they would like to tell car crash victims how stupid they were to get into that accident. People don't think before they speak, often don't understand what they're talking about but that does not deter them. So, ignore them to the extent you can, because you understand that they are ignorant and lack empathy.
Smile.
It did take a lot of courage to come forward and the delay in time has me asking myself what your relationship was to this person - was this someone you once trusted - the experience will have muddled your mind no doubt. Working with a skilled therapist would be helpful as you process what happened and how this has impacted you since the incident. You may very well have PTSD as a result of this incident happening at such a young and impressionable age.
I hope you can find the support you need.
I'm sorry that people have caused you distress, adding to the burden of your experience, because they have simply not walked a mile or two in your shoes. Sometimes it takes years for people to confront what happened to them as they try to work out in their own mind what coming forward would mean to so many who love you.
The thoughts will not go away by themselves, I would think - you need the support of someone who is trained in this to be able to help you resolve what happened within yourself.
I know myself as a parent whose young children were assaulted in our community that I have never been the same inside. It created a lot of doubt about who I could trust with anything, I became suspicious of everyone and with good reason but nearly drove myself around a bend.
Has your offender been arrested?
Do whatever you can to create a supportive community around yourself, you are deserving of it. As others have said here, it takes courage confronting such a devastating experience.
No, I have to gather evidence I’m in New York which has strict rape laws so I’m happy about that. Still won’t be easy since I have to face him in court and testify.
It may not be easy, but it is important for both you and to prevent him from doing it to anyone else. I hope you can find what you need and the support to go with you when you face him.
Im so sorry to hear what you’re going through and what you’ve been through. That must be really hard. I struggle with depression too and am having a hard time. Take it a day at a time and keep fighting the good fight. You are not alone. ❤️
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