Help: I hate depression. And anxiety... - Anxiety and Depre...

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had_o
had_o

I hate depression. And anxiety. Every single day is a struggle and I’m drowning. I wake up and there’s no point in anything, I don’t want to move, and when I do eventually start to move everything feels like it’s in slow motion. Sometimes I get so anxious that I can’t be in my own body. My skin crawls and I need to get out. And sometimes I get so low that all I see is black. And darkness.

I’m not sure where this was going. But I’m just looking for anyone else who feels similarly...or feels other emotions and feelings related to anxiety and depression.

29 Replies
oldestnewest

yes, I feel that too. In the mornings when I get sometimes I shake but I try little steps like drinking a cup of tea or making a list of things I am grate full for in my life. Also my medication has helped too.

Take care

had_o
had_o in reply to Fuzzy22

😔💕

I feel very similar most days of my life. I’m anxious all the time and very depressed and despite doing some positive things throughout my day I only get temporary relief. I’m bored all the time and am disappointed with where I’m at in my life. I don’t like my life and I wish I could just feel normal.

had_o
had_o in reply to jpsmith

I feel exactly the same. It’s awful

jpsmith
jpsmith in reply to had_o

I’m not sure what to do at this point. I’m on medication and have a good psychiatrist. I go to counseling once a week and that helps a little. I’m a sober member of Alcoholics Anonymous and have been sober over five years and I go to the gym about 3-5 times per week. I’m on disability so I’m not working currently but can work part time if I find a job I can do but I feel so incapable of working because of my depression and anxiety.

had_o
had_o in reply to jpsmith

I’m so sorry...that sounds like hell 😔that’s good you’ve been sober for so long!

jpsmith
jpsmith in reply to had_o

It’s really hard and I can relate totally to what you’re going through too.

I feel the same way!

missskippy
missskippy in reply to jpsmith

I share a lot of what you are going through. I am also on meds, saw different psychiatrists, and am on disability. Like you I can work a little bit without losing my disability allowance. I feel I went through the same treatments advice by my doctor, but I don't think it helped me change. I can't figure out why talking to a psychiatrist or a counselor is suppose to help because I just talk and they listen. So? That's it just talk. I go because it gets me out of the house, but it is always the same things they say, not much. When I worked it was covered in my health benefits but now I have to pay and I don't know what work I can do. Deliver papers when everyone is still sleeping is one idea I might try. It is a big downfall from what I used to do but for now, it might help me get out, exercise, and get paid. I don't know what my meds are supposed to do either. They always ask how do you feel now with my meds and I have a hard time answering because I don't know if it is helping, I tell my doctor that and ask him how do I know it is working? Am I suppose to be jolly, want to go out, feel less anxious? I have been on different meds and they are all the same, and they change meds again. I finally just stopped with a med that isn't making me feel what? Why can't they answer that instead if giving me increased meds or changing it? I don't feel like taking it anymore unless it is something I use to help me sleep. Sorry, I forgot I was supposed to help you, but I'm in the same boat as you, maybe even worse. You did really good with quitting drinking but it is something you always have to watch out for. I am now addicted to my anxiety meds for like 25-or more years now. I can't sleep at a normal time as others. I sleep during the day and up at night. that is due to me being used to working night shifts. I am still new on this site so my advice is probably not good, so I hope someone can give you some advice. Did you have any advice for me? Lol Good Luck.

had_o
had_o in reply to missskippy

I would look into a new therapist and psychiatrist...seeing two is sometimes useful, as one is meant for tAlking and another is meant for prescribing medications. You can pick and choose, if you don’t like one therapist or psychiatrist you can always find anotber

It’s very common to speak and move slowly when in a depressive state. The dark smothering hopelessness mixed with anxiety often makes people feel disconnected from their bodies, like your body is on auto pilot and your mind is somewhere completely different. It is a very strange and unwelcome feeling.

I’ve suffered both depression and anxiety since a very young age. Mine usually starts out as horrible anxiety attacks which then leads to depression. Such a toxic combo to deal with.

I do understand and relate to how you are feeling. It is such a yucky feeling and I’m so sorry you are going through this hell.

No one wants to wake up with an uncontrollable feeling of impending doom, dread, sadness, and fear, but it happens. The good news.... there is hope and help and what you are feeling will not last forever. You are already being proactive by reaching out here where you are amongst friends who understand your pain.

Consider talking to your doctor about how you have been feeling and what options are best for you. There is light at the end of the tunnel and there is no need to suffer so deeply when there are so many options to offer relief from the pain you are experiencing.

You are not weak for asking for help or needing medication. You are strong for enduring and sharing your struggles with us.

Hang in there. Again, you aren’t alone.

Eileen

had_o
had_o in reply to hunter4ransom

Thank you for the support ❤️

Hidden
Hidden

Yes I can relate to your post. Anxiety wakes me up at 5am, the intense anxiety and feeling of fear. Sometimes I just go from the bed to the couch. My mind is riddled with thoughts of doom and despair. I do have hope though. I think the key is to start believing that you are enough, you are enough in this life. For me, the anxiety causes a cycle of panic and reassurance seeking. I have to learn to tell myself that I am enough.

had_o
had_o in reply to Hidden

I feel similarly 😔💕

I know exactly how you feel. I have to force myself to function. I am in survival mode.

had_o
had_o in reply to bonkers65

Me too... 😔

Then you were looking for me! I have this sinking feeling for more than five years now. You described it so well, you know. Thank you for that. I can't talk about this with my family, they just say it will go away or that it's all in my head. My therapist just nodds , I know she doesn't know how it feels, I know she doesn't care. She's never been there. You've been there, you are there so you know how it feels. Agony each and every single day. Lethargy, nothingness followed by that crawling feeling of anxiety. My heart goes to you. I am so sorry you have to get through this. I really am. We're heroes. I don't know how I managed to survive through all this darkness. Maybe you wonder the same about yourself. I don't know if there's a silver lining. They keep telling me it will go away but it never does so I know how it feels. I am always here for you. You can talk to me.🤗🤗🤗

had_o
had_o in reply to aurora31

Wow... and Thank you❤️

aurora31
aurora31 in reply to had_o

You are so welcome 🤗!

I feel the same. I can definitely relate to what you said “I wake up and there’s no point to anything”. I have dreams and I wake up disappointed because I’m back to reality. I keep wondering if things will get better but I don’t have much hope.

had_o
had_o in reply to JS1981

Yeah...I feel the same

I was exactly where you are with my depression anxiety about two months ago it lasted for me for about nine months then someone told me about acupuncture I called around and found a doctor that has worked with people with depression anxiety and after five sessions I was 100% back to myself I would urge you to try it it’s worth it to see what happens for you but make sure that the doctor that you called has worked with people that have depression And anxiety

had_o
had_o in reply to techguy

Wow...maybe I’ll look around!

techguy
techguy in reply to had_o

If you want a nightmare to end don’t say maybe say you will look around because if this takes care of it it will change your life

Sorry, feel lots of the same.

I have struggled with anxiety/depression, off and on, my entire life. Mine was always brought on by major stress but once the stress went away I started feeling better. So I just wanted everybody to know that it can get better. It not impossible to feel better. If you suffer from anxiety you probably have a lot of negative "What If" thoughts. Well have this thought - "What If I Get Better"

had_o
had_o in reply to bonkers65

That’s a great perspective. Thank you

I too feel the same!! Sometimes I feel so outside of myself that I have to take a nap to come back into my body. It took courage to spell it all out. Everyone is here for you.

I know just how you feel. My anxiety led me to the Emergency Room. But your life is of great value. My faith sees me through. I hope you have an anchor to keep you. Hugs your way!

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