And I feel so numb, my brother and I had to do CPR on her for 30 mins, before rapid response arrived .
And I just can't get the image of the way she was in the end out of my head thats twice in just over a year I have had to do CPR I had to do CPR on my neighbour and then on my mother and neither made it.
My life basically revolved around my mother being her carer, now that she is gone, a giant chunk of me has gone with her , I am functioning because my sad still requires care , but I never thought in a million years my mother would go so soon 56 years old here one sec gone the next I really hate this life.
Written by
CJ2016
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
I am so sorry for your loss. A close friend lost his grandson a couple months ago and his daughter who is a nurse had to perform CPR on him as well. He was 2 days from turning 16 but he had health issues, wasn't supposed to live 1 day, a couple months, a couple years. I know she can sympathize. I watched my "father-in-law" (my bf and I have been together for 17 years - 15 at the time of his passing - so his parents consider me family) take his last breath. That has stuck with me and haunts me to this day. If I can't hear my bf when he's asleep or even my cat, I sit and watch to see if they are breathing. I hope things get better for you.
My goodness, I am so sorry dear girl. It's ok to be broken right now. That is so hard,and an absolute horrible experiance . Each time your mind goes to how she looked at the end try to replace that thought with a different good visual of your mother. It's hard but just try. This is all very fresh. Please reach out for help as much as you need to. Grief is the worst feeling in the world. Drink lots of water,it helps.
My heart aches for you. I’ve lost so many people. I think you need a parent loss support group. My father commit suicide and 10 years later my mother had Alzheimer’s (did not know who I was) I held her hand when she took her last breath. You never think you’re going to get over it but one day the pain is less severe. Again I am so very sorry.
Good and research each one that comes up. That’s how I found a support group for suicide survivors after my father commit suicide and that’s how I found this group
Sorry for your loss 🙏. Losing a parent is difficult. I lost my dad about 40 years ago. I still cry when I see anything when it involves a dad n daughter. My dad didn’t get to walk me down the isle. I miss sharing our lives together, we were Close. I’m waiting for a call about my mom who has dementia any day now, she’s in her 90’s. Prayers for you n you’re Family 🙏
I am so very sorry your mother died. You can honestly say you tried everything humanly possible to save your mother. Being a caregiver is so all consuming that you don't have time to ask yourself, "What do I want to do today?"
Presently, you are dealing with grief. Give yourself permission to grieve in your way, whatever gives you comfort and relief. Your mom is always going to be with you everyday of your life.
Your body and brain are working to help get you through the next upcoming things that need to be done. The numbness is helping you now. All of us are thinking about you and sending you a warm understanding hug.
Dear friend I'm so sorry for your loss. Try not to beat yourself for your difficulty in letting go of your mom's passing or the memory of how it happened. This would be a normal reaction and will be part of your grieving process. You may need some grief counseling to help you through. I'm here for you.
I am sorry for your loss. I do understand about losing your mom. My mom passed away from Covid on July 13 this year. She was my best friend. I am here if you would find it helpful to chat.
Allow yourself time to grieve. Shedding a tear in private can help. It's so important to grieve. It is the first step of your return to some sort of normality.
Allow yourself time to grieve. Then start remembering the good times. The happy days you shared.
Remember what your dad must be going through right now. Draw closer to him, comfort him, share the happy memories together.
Death is only like moving from one room to another. In due course life must carry on.
Thanks guys really appreciate the replys, honestly it feels like I am in a different world right now.
I have great memories of my mother , and it hurts really bad knowing that I won't get to talk to her and hear her laugh and see her smile and ask how well she slept ever again and it truly does break my heart.
Its still fresh so having waves or good memories with my mother but also flashbacks of that night and its really tearing me apart ,but as much as I feel like I don't want to be here anymore , I got to keep going for my dad & dog.
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
My Son passed away from an accidental overdose
My dad passed away and I'm really struggling 
My Mother Died and I am Lost without Her
Happy birthday to my mother 
I don’t think my mother like me 
