Regrets

How can i take back confessing to my parents about my depression. I knew all this time i should just stay quiet. I should have said no i have never been depressed or sad if i had only kept my mouth shut right now i wouldn't be in pain. It hurts to know that keeping things and feelings to yourself is better. To know that at any moment your mother will throw in your face all your issues. Wish i could say that this depression was something recent but it's not. Not having my parents support has really damaged me for some time now. Drinking was my easiest escape from all this but i decided to quit because if i wanted to follow God i had to change a lot of things i was doing wrong. But i started at the age of 21 and no i wouldn't drink every day but i would hide with a friend to drink. But the last year i took drinking like a hobby because depression came knocking to my door and i had let it all in. I guess I'll always keep to myself the times i wanted to end my own life. The times i didn't feel worthy enough to have the love of my parents the love of a boyfriend and friends those times where death wanted me so badly and i wasn't scared.

[lostgirl75]

Never be ashamed of how you feel you can’t control if your happy or sad. Just like we can’t control the weather. And if your parents throw it in your face throw it back at them in theirs in a nice way

[Hidden]

I’m so sorry. For anyone to use your own depression against you to make you feel horrible is just plain evil. I really do understand you... it’s why I’ve barely told anyone about my own problems. None of my friends know because I’m honestly scared of what they’ll do.

But you did something really really brave, and you spoke up. We can’t heal ourselves if we don’t know we’re hurt. And you know you’re hurt and you acknowledged that because you want to get better. Be proud of that. I’m proud of you and so are the rest of us for taking that step.

Not having anyone’s support can really hurt, and I really do speak from what I’m experiencing too. You are not alone.

The drinking sounds really crazy. Im not old enough to drink, but I myself have been struggling with an addiction, so I can empathize with your pain there.

While I know it may sound crazy, keeping those times and emotions where you want to end your life bottled up will only make it worse.

You are worthy of love. You are special and wonderfully made and deserving of affection and your voice deserves to be heard. I don’t know what your parents’ and friends’ problems are, but you deserve their love. And one day you will have the love of someone special.

Please, please, please don’t do anything to hurt yourself. You deserve better. Hope is real. Love is real. You will have it sooner than you know.