Hello beautiful souls. I have been facing a problem since last year which has triggered my OCD thoughts. The things which triggered my thoughts had been present before, too but they didn't affect me then. They started troubling me only after a certain incident caught my attention toward these things... and my mind started guilt tripping me, providing fake evidences and whenever I was busy doing something else my mind started confirming that I wasn't having those thoughts which in turn triggers my anxiety.. and due to being home most of the time these days has made them worse.. I had faced a major incident last month about which I had posted here and it had helped me a lot.. I have successfully been able to stop worrying and thinking about this incident .. I just analysed all my thoughts about this recent incident, I wrote them down, I talked about it to others.. and I finally found an answer which automatically shut my thoughts down.
So, I want to do the same with this problem of mine. I want to analyse these thoughts so that I can atleast get some clarity even if I don't find a satisfactory answer. But the problem is that the triggers are around me 24/7 ( some things as common as a comb or a water bottle.. even some necessities)... and I have tried to eliminate most of them.. but eliminating hasn't helped me.. it has made it worse instead.. I want to write this problem down but am afraid that writing it down will be more like accepting to believe these thoughts or it might make my anxiety worse... the reason why I am not directly mentioning my problem here.. and I also don't know whether distracting myself from these thoughts by engaging in other activities might help.. because the thoughts are bound to come back.. and half of this problem which I am facing is related to the future.. there are some things which I never want to engage in (like drinking) but am not sure what I'll do in the future or what I'll believe in.. and there are times when I'm free of these thoughts because I'm thinking pleasant thoughts which happen to be the exact opposite of these thoughts.. somewhere in my mind I know that I believe in these pleasant thoughts but the unpleasant thoughts come back ... so I want to ask is what should I do to keep myself grounded while I try to write these thoughts down, label them and try to find some clarity... I really want to solve this problem.. and I know that I'm carving a mountain out of a mole hill..How should I prove to myself that I indeed believe in those pleasant thoughts...how should I approach this problem without getting atleast 1% less triggered ?
What should be private?
Faith and Angels, hard times, need to believe
OCD flared up yesterday
Feeling like I don't deserve to be loved 
