Do I still belong?

[Mrspjsmom]

I haven't been here in a very long time. Have been struggling so much I simply hide in my house and isolate myself from the world. I have no strength left to face the craziness of the world. But hiding doesn't accomplish anything or help. I wake up every morning feeling anxious, useless and like I don't matter to anyone. Every day I feel like I don't belong anywhere and am not as important as the other people in my life or even in the world. I am scared and lost. So I am reaching out to the people I know understand. The people who don't judge me for having depression and anxiety. I hope with all my heart I still belong here. I hope all of you are well and dealing with this crazy world without getting lost like I have.

[LilyAnnepuppy]

Of course you still belong here. A few of us have been wondering where you went. We were reminiscing about your puzzles and saying how we missed them. Someone attempted to post one and we had a good time with it, but you’re the master at the game.

Sorry you’re having a hard time but glad you’re back in the fold. We are your people. And you know we identify with you. Welcome back.

[Mrspjsmom in reply to LilyAnnepuppy]

Thank you. Not up to puzzles quite yet but eventually they will come back too.

[Hidden]

It's so easy to get lost, and to feel what you're feeling. I hope one day you see your worth. And I also hope you can face whatever fear you have stopping you from living a beautiful life. And when I say that I don't mean beautiful like you see on TV, or that people portray to have in their lives. I mean the beauty and freedom in being raw. The beauty in disagreement and fighting. The beauty to be you. Not the exterior beauty of putting on makeup and worrying about how people see you. Letting people see the real, messy, unfiltered version of yourself is so freeing, and that my dear is always beautiful to see. I hope things get better for you!

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Hidden]

I like your vision of beauty. It is a great deal like mine. Ironically this is one of the reasons I don't belong. But I will continue to be myself. Even when it is lonely.

[Hidden]

I'd say everyone is really going through a lot right now with this crazy pandemic. Yesterday I swear I had some kind of silent panic attack, it was the strangest thing. You are not alone even though you might feel really alone. I took a long shower this morning and I feel somewhat better. Showers and baths can help a lot to reduce anxiety. I'm going for a long walk outside soon, because I haven't been outside in a couple days myself. It feels so strange when I encounter someone, I will wear a mask. I hope I said something helpful, this situation is rough I know.

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Hidden]

You were very helpful. I have a large deck and yard. I spend as much time out there as I can. The one thing I have done during this dark spell is plant both flowers and vegetables in containers on the deck. Heirloom tomatoes, cherry tomatoes, cucumber, green onions, yellow squash, zucchini and potatoes. Have been able to go outside and harvest cherry tomatoes, cucumber, green onions, chives and a few yellow squash.

[Sillysausage234]

😀....good to see you

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Sillysausage234]

Missed you Silly

[Hidden]

You will always be welcomed here 🙂

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Hidden]

Thanks

[Kkimm]

Nice to have you back.

Hope you feel better soon

Kim

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Kkimm]

Thank you.

[Agora1]

Of course you still belong Mrspjsmom x

This is one place where you can "go back home"

You are not alone in how you feel...the longer this goes on,

the more people join in with the same feelings of anxiousness

and frustration. I'm glad you are back in a safe place. xx

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Agora1]

Has been difficult for everyone. My husband and children are front line workers. My daughter has to take some shifts on the Covid floor because they rotate the staff. But so far everyone is healthy and safe. The area of New York where we live is upstate nowhere near the city so we didn't have many of the problems the city did.

[Agora1 in reply to Mrspjsmom]

You certainly have your worries as a wife and mother concerning the jobs they have.

On the other hand, you must be very proud of them. Please thank them for all they are

doing. I pray they stay safe and healthy. Take care of you as well xx

[Dolphin14]

Been missing you❤️

Of course you belong here.

[Mrspjsmom in reply to Dolphin14]

Thanks. It has been a very difficult few months. Glad to be back.

[spiral25]

Hello, I've just joined and am enjoying finding people who understand and don't judge. Today's world is certainly not helping with anxiety, I'm glad to have found this place.