Big setback

[Kevin160]

I used to be really able to cope with stressful events, i was able to phase it out and sleep well a night prior to an important exam, or to a social event, or to a big event, but now i cant

I have my drivers test soon, im 19 so its late, anyway and im supposed to take my exam in a couple days or so , eventhough it shouldnt be stressful and even if i fail i can simply retake it, my mind is saying this is so easy and simple, i know what i need to do and im going to be ok regardless

My heart is pounding out of my chest, im sick to my stomach and i can barely breathe, i dont know how am i going to even try to sleep and i feel so overwhelmed with everything like im going to crack , trying everything but nothing ever works, started to hate myself for being like this and feeling so frustrated that it never gets better

Why cant i simply be calm, believe in myself and just sleep well, wake up calm, and get on with my day, take on anything, im mot asking for much, not money, not love , not anything crazy , just want good mental and physical health

[newbie1956]

Kevin, i'm so sorry for you. i really do hear your pain...

Please be patient with yourself. Things will get better.

God's love will get us thru. His Love ever fails. <3

[Kevin160 in reply to newbie1956]

I will try to be more patient, but its a bit frustrating, usually the more time passes , we mature, and become more capable of dealing with stressful situations, sometimes to me its the other way around, i feel like im overthinking things that never bothered me before

[newbie1956 in reply to Kevin160]

Hi Kevin,

Anxiety and stress are real & many people of all ages struggle daily.

We need each other for reassurance, especially the last few months.

Take one day at a time & remember that we survive each day

[Kevin160 in reply to newbie1956]

Definitely going to keep that in mind, it is surely difficult to not think about an upcoming event especially when its stressful, it starts interfering with sleep, thinking, eating , and you find yourself really hopeless

[newbie1956 in reply to Kevin160]

Kevin, When it feels hopeless, hope will keep us going.

We put one foot in front of the other & keep moving forward.

I'd love to hear a good report from you soon.

Sincerely yours

[chavez13]

Kevin, I took the driving test 3 test and then I passed it. You take your time my friend and just do your best! You got this my friend!

[Kevin160 in reply to chavez13]

Ofcourse i dont want to fail, but i do know deep down its not a big deal if i did, but the anxiety is based solely on nothing, maybe the anticipation, and im very uncomfortable whenever i think about anything in the future , any events, anything i have to do, i overworry because i simply hate having something on my plate i feel like i have to finish it and then i can be calm

[Fumble]

Sorry to hear that the anxiety has kicked in, it's so frustrating when it's something you know you can do too.

You know that it's not always been like this in the past and there's no reason why it will be in the future. Don't hate yourself for it. There's a lot going on in the world at the moment to add to the stress.

I'm sure you will be fine for the next occasion.

[Kevin160 in reply to Fumble]

Yea in my early teens i had alot of stress and anxiety, but because i didnt know alot about it , i wouldnt make it a big deal and as i overcome more fears, my anxiety wasnt as severe when it came to stressful events, i could actually sleep well, and wouldnt really overthink anything until it happens, but now because i overworry about anxiety and its effect on my heakth , and because i know so so much about anxiety and started therapy , its become this big part of my life where anticipation seems to cause a flare up

[Anxiousmermaid57]

Yes be patient with yourself. Remember that what you are feeling is a normal feeling and that the physical symptoms are a normal part of it too. I’m in the process of this myself and things will get better. 😉

[Kevin160 in reply to Anxiousmermaid57]

Yea i have been in this situation many times, i forgot to follow the advice that usuakky workd , which is claire weekes’ acceptance method, i was just really upset that im worrying about something that is really not that scary , and its more frustrating because my brain knows that, but with anxiety, body and mind sometimes dont work together, and i feel calm mentally, but my heart is always palpitating then i start feeling the tension and the next thing i know my mind is playing scenarios that are irrational and my anxiety worsens

[Fumble in reply to Kevin160]

That's the most frustrating thing when you know it's something that really isn't scary but you still get stressed and scared. I'm finding therapy is really helping me not get annoyed with myself when that happens that helps reduce my overall stress level and makes the whole experience more comfortable. I'm sure you'll find a way to overcome this

[Kevin160 in reply to Fumble]

Yes hopefully we all do , good luck with therapy

[FindingTree]

Same thing happened to me (didn’t get my license til 21) I was so nervous about failing that I was freaking myself out. I was lucky to have a driving examiner that was so nice and calming, even though I was driving so slow (35 in a 50). I just took a deep breath and relaxed, told myself I’ve done it many time before and I’ll get through this.

Just take your time and breath. I hope you pass ❤️

[Kevin160 in reply to FindingTree]

Well, unlike you i had alot of problems with the centre and a really bad driving instructors, i barely took a few classes but my dad has been teaching me to drive since i was 14 so i would consider myself to be really good , my assessment was good so i can take the exam , and im confident with driving, but i just cant seem to convince my body , and my heart that keeps pounding that its not a big deal

[FindingTree in reply to Kevin160]

Sorry to hear about your experience. If driving with your dad makes you feel comfortable try tricking your brain into thinking the examiner is your dad teaching you how to drive. Maybe that’ll help calm your body and soothe the heart pounding.

[Kevin160 in reply to FindingTree]

That isnt such a bad idea , Maybe it will help thank you

[FindingTree in reply to Kevin160]

No problem, let me know how it goes. Good Luck!

[Straight]

This anxiety issue started for me as a child and now at the age of 55 I just realized that I suffered with it even then. It affected so many aspects of my life and in fact strained my marriage. The sad part is it didn’t have to. The good part is it does not have to affect your life. You are young and have tools out there to explain what is going on.

Acknowledge your thoughts as just that. Acceptance of your feelings and know they are temporary. A natural response to stress. Calm yourself through breathing and guided meditation. Practice your skills.

Focus on your breathing stay centered in the present moment.

Wow!! Now if I could just do all that I would be golden!

[Agora1 in reply to Straight]

I was just thinking that myself Straight Your advice to Kevin was right

on target. And yet, you can't seem to apply it to yourself. It makes no

difference how old we are or how many years have gone by with mental

illness, the answer stays the same. We must change, we must be proactive

in getting better. Life is more than about just existing but living it to the

fullest. xx

[Kevin160 in reply to Straight]

I definitely try to accept the anxiety, and it helps alot, but my main problem is that sometimes the anxiety is based on something that really isnt scary, i want to get rid of it because i want to be free, but i also want to accept it because i want it to be tolerable , i try to do so much that i just get frustrated easily because even with this anxiety journey, i reached a point where i could sleep before a stressful event, and i was fine , but now i feel like im back at square 1, i couldnt sleep at all these past few days, amd when im tired i get derealization spells that make me really scared and i worry about slep, and anxiety , worsening both, a vicious cycle