Day before Yesterday

[uniquediamond]

Hi online friends! I really needed to get this off my chest and I feel like this is a safe place for me to do so. I work full time as a hospitality receptionist. (Guest services) So I deal with people everyday. Yea I'm scared due to covid-19 (who isn't right) I feel like this virus definitely has people doing things they normally wouldn't do, or if they already act in such a way I believe covid-19 is intensifying it by 100%. I had a guest that was extremely intoxicated, to the point he couldn't walk and he ended up hurting himself really bad (meaning blood was involved, not a lot but enough) 2nd time we've had a problem with him. I ended up calling our local police department, which they already knew him from a previous incident. I caught myself getting very angry and almost irritated at this older gentleman due to the nature of the whole thing, after a few minutes he ended up going to the hospital due to how intoxicated he was. When he left I sat there for a minutes asking myself "why, why did I get mad" clearly something happened in his life that made him like this, maybe he doesn't have a family or friends and the list went on. I told myself "nikki" yes I sometimes call me by my name (3rd person) lol needed that laugh. Anyways I told myself it doesn't matter what people are doing right at this moment, what matters is how I respond to it. This goes back to covid-19 this virus is effecting people in every aspect of the board! I'm definitely one of them! I feel so terrible and mad at myself on how I responded to this guy! You could definitely see the frustration in my eyes and the tone in my voice when I was trying to talk to him. 😟 I don't know what to say, so I'll leave this post here.

[Hidden]

I think your reaction and feelings were normal. I think I would have felt the same. Im a retired nurse who has seen alot of people struggling to live. It upsets me when I see people being so careless about their own lives, like they dont care.

[uniquediamond in reply to Hidden]

Your 100% right. I just can't help to feel bad

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

They don't think it will happen to them.

[RecreateMyself]

Hi, when I see an alcoholic, my heart goes out to them because they have an illness that they are battling against. I understand how u feel and don’t blame u at all... I think your reaction seems completely normal during this time of crisis. Don’t be hard on yourself, I thank u for being on the front line during this pandemic!

[uniquediamond in reply to RecreateMyself]

Thank you very much! And also thank you for taking the time to respond to my post!

[steven14]

You were just letting of your frustrations and anxiety it does not make you a bad person we all react differently at times it's how we learn you already identified that in how you feel this is a challenging time at the moment I am a senior carer I have seen what covid is doing in are homes were we work take care

[uniquediamond in reply to steven14]

Thank you for working during this! And also thank you for the response, it means a lot to me to have all of you.

[saracar]

You are very sweet. I think that attitude is something to aspire to. Just the fact you try to think that way. I think even though you felt judgement in the moment, the fact that you examined it and wanted something different is more than enough.

When I am too hard on myself, I ask myself if I treat myself like this it will come out on others too.

Thank you for doing your job. I am struggling right now with even the idea of having to go into my school and clean stuff up with my team. Haven’t been leaving the house. Thank you!

[uniquediamond in reply to saracar]

Working on the frontline is a scary thing, not a day goes by that I dont think about it and wonder all the time 😖 thank you also for your kind words and response

[Palmo]

Don't be hard on yourself, your reaction is totally understandable and down to utter frustration. Give "nikki" a much needed hug and know your worth by being on the frontline with this xx

[uniquediamond]

Thank you very much! I've calmed down since then, I just felt so bad for him and I definitely was beating myself up over the whole thing. And thank you again for responding! 💕

[SuZQ154]

You are a tender-hearted person, which is precious! Your response seems normal and appropriate. I commend you for looking deeper into people and considering what they have gone through previously which may be effecting their lives now. We all have "pasts" which effect our presents and are triggers.

COVID is impacting us in unique ways and we may need to consider ways to adjust to this unique time. Recently I listened to Rick Warren from Saddleback Church and

The COVID Ten Commandments:

1. Show grace to myslef and others.

2. Start and end each day refueling my soul.

3. Set and stick with a simple routine.

4. Stop watching so much news.

5. Schedule a daily connections with people I love.

6. Share my feelings instead of stuffing them.

7. Seek advice before making major decisions.

8. Space renewal breaks throughout the day.

9. Serve someone suffering more than me.

10. Control what's controllable and trust God for the rest.

It seems like you are following many of these already!

They have helped me and I hope they help you!

Blessings!

[uniquediamond in reply to SuZQ154]

Wow! Thank you so much for this! I needed this! Bless you! ❤️❤️❤️

[GustheGrinch]

I completely understand. I managed a bar for about a year when I was younger and it is so easy to get upset with intoxicated people, particularly when you are not drinking. Just your own insight into your anger is a positive thing. It was all I could do to get my security team to be understanding and we were the bar over serving the customer.