THE NEW OLD ME, Dressed for going out... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

90,942 members84,883 posts

THE NEW OLD ME, Dressed for going out . Have you changed your look lately?

sweetiepye profile image
12 Replies

I'm not sure of anything anymore. Do we avoid eye contact ? Cross to the other side of the street ? I'm thinking of saying 'Hello , I'm Pam. Step away , please.' " Hello, stand down , will you ? " ' Oh Hello there , could you hurry along ? "

what do you think ?

Written by
sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
12 Replies
JorgeGeorge profile image
JorgeGeorge

Good questions. I've been making eye contact and nodding. Smiling doesn't help when you're wearing a mask! I occasionally say, "Hi" but not often. It seems like we are all afraid of each other. Perhaps we should be.

I've had people walk into the bushes to avoid me. That seems extreme if we are both wearing masks.

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to JorgeGeorge

It's funny and sad at the same time . I like people in general and I'm friendly to a point , but I don't trust my life to most people's judgement. So , I keep my distance and feel bad about it .

All_alone profile image
All_alone

People are still friendly here with eye contact and smiles. I hope society doesn't become even more detached in the future. I was in a store this week and avoided an aisle that had four other shoppers in it. I actually like your look. Pull your ball cap down a tad more and you can probably go unrecognized. It has worked for me in the past.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14

Love your look! Did you make your mask?

I only go out to walk. I do continue the distancing as it is still recommended with a mask on.

I find myself making no eye contact with people that don't have masks on. I'm upset about them choosing not to follow suggested guidelines.

I do cross the street to be alone if possible, if not I will distance as far as possible. If I do pass by someone I say good morning.

I would say it's 50/50 here as far as people being social. Probably not much different than it used to be.

Stay safe out there. You look fabulous

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to Dolphin14

My mask is a neck scarf folded over twice. I also use a wide headband which works well. It's my dressy mask. I use a cane when I walk so if anyone gets too close I will poke them .

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to sweetiepye

LMAO!! You GO girl ❤️

I have not changed my look. Nothing has changed for me. I have been in near-isolation for years now. This is not a good thing.

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to

I am not totally alone . My husband is with me. We were talking about this over dinner. We had plans for hot dogs , but our Pastor brought dinner over. A lovely chicken dinner the church ladies had fixed . We get one about once a week and it's always a surprise . Our daughter brings our groceries once a week in a drive by . We see 3 of our grandkids on video visits once a week, and that is the extent of our social life. We like it. I know it sounds selfish but we enjoy the time together . We keep to a schedule , have the usual chores , lunch, we read and watch the news , we walk every day . Nothing exciting , but interesting to us. If I were totally alone I would have to drum up some business. I would ask for church visits , join an online book club . Is your isolation by choice ? I find this site HU, very friendly and I check in most days. It helps me and I hope it helps others. Pam

in reply to sweetiepye

Thank you for your reply.

It's been like this since I was laid off from my job as an environmental scientist in 2013. The very month my health insurance ended from that employer I injured my knee badly enough that I could not walk for several months. So it sort of started there. I did gig work for awhile but then that ended and I've not been able to find something else for some reason, not for wont of trying. I am married but my husband isn't supportive in the way I need. He works full time and has a commercial property that provides income as well. But he comes home, starts drinking beer and falls asleep during dinner on most nights. As soon as he gets here he turns his computer on and plays video games, which I like as well but I am desperate for conversation. He doesn't go on walks with me and our dog, but he will sometimes go if I ask. What keeps me completely unsettled is that he will not give me any details on what I should do if something were to happen to him. There is no will, and he gets angry if I press him on putting something together. I don't feel safe and have not felt safe in years upon years. Our relationship is suffering and I'm not sure how long I can live like this.

I am involved in a few online bookclubs on the Goodreads site, but the conversations aren't really forthcoming. As for my own isolation, it just happened temporarily and somehow became permanent. Mostly it doesn't bother me but I know it's not natural, yet there's nothing I can do about it right now.

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to

I have been through similar experiences . I lost my job ( school closed ) and developed several illnesses at the same time. I felt like I had lost my life. Actually , I had and it was a life I really enjoyed. So I was quite bitter and angry about it. The next few years brought more illness and depression and I was firmly attached to a downward spiral. My husband and children , adults at this time , became estranged and I isolated myself. More years went by, our marriage was a misery , we just lived day to day . This past year I completely broke down . I asked my husband to speak to both my gp and my therapist. He developed an understanding of what I was going through and started in little ways to help me. Especially in regard to my relationship with my kids. For the past year we have worked hard to be kind and understanding to each other. For the most part it has been very good . I had another issue , this time addiction to a prescription drug . I would not have survived it without my husband's help . While this was happening the pandemic happened and it has given us time to reflect on where we've been and where we want to go. I never expected to have a decent life again and I am very willing to work on keeping it healthy . Your response resonated with me. I know those fears and that aloneness . It is a terrible place to be. I hope my story helps you in some way. I am very defiantly a work in progress. Pam

kenster1 profile image
kenster1

is that you in preparation getting ready to rob the local bank.

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to kenster1

Maybe. I don't know , who did you say I am ? I don't feel so well . Too many eggrolls I guess.

Not what you're looking for?

You may also like...

Anyone experience deteriorating health due to not leaving the house and/or sitting a lot?

Due to depression (and to an extent, anxiety) it's gotten really difficult to accomplish things...

Equal opportunity

Do you think someone with a mental illness should have the chance to be an elected official?

How to stop the Self mind games

i always have a feeling I know everything, i know what people are doing and thinking and that...

What to do when made feel worthless by own mother

Normally i dont open up about my feelings like this…. But in this group , even though im new here,...

Stuck

I want to work, I want to help people, but I cry at the drop of a hat. I try to care less, but I...