Why me? Have you asked yourself that question? What positive thing did you do for yourself today?

[HopeforJustice]

Unless you are an immortal Super Hero and immune to anything negative, something unexpected will turn up. Instead ask yourself... Why not me? I am human therefore today I will tackle this situation. Today I have a plan on how to face my fears. What is your plan?

[Roukaya]

I hope you are well

I have listened to your advice and yesterday my Mother rang me ten times

I told her she rang me too many times and her anger has started

It is very difficult to stand up for myself with such a Mother who can be kind but very bad tempered

[HopeforJustice]

I am so proud of you. Congratulate yourself for taking a step in a positive direction. If anyone called me 10 times in one day, I would block their number or get a restraining order, that is harassment. Unless it is your child or spouse having a medical emergency, you are not obligated to respond to anyone (except your boss at work). If you don't have either one of these, you do not owe her or anyone an explanation. This is YOUR life, remind yourself of that daily. Did you forget you are an adult and no longer need to obey your mother? By responding to her, she still controls you. I don't understand why everyone feels a duty to response to texts or pick up phone calls, there is not a law requiring us to do so. I ignore people all the time, because I am busy and don't want the distraction.

A healthy relationship is balanced, a dysfunctional relationship is toxic and brings you down. Break the co-dependent cycle. All you need to do, is think about you, not her. She is a grown woman who needs to control you to validate her self-worth. Controlling you gives her power. Take away her power. Send her one kind text with something like this...

"I am moving on with my life and achieving my goals. I will contact you once I am successful, please do not contact me and please respect me and my boundaries"

She is like a anchor keeping you down and stagnant. Find people who are sails to move forward. Her response is not important. Simply block her number through your cell company or change your number.

If you'd like to keep me posted, please message me directly. I have returned back to college and currently taking 19 units and in the middle of finals.

Start living for you, make your plan. Start sailing on the right course.

You got this, I believe in you.

Hope

[Roukaya]

I have seen you have read my post

Could you reply if you can

[HopeforJustice in reply to Roukaya]

I did reply, can you see it?

[HopeforJustice in reply to Roukaya]

It may be on my message board with my original post, unsure??

[Roukaya in reply to HopeforJustice]

I have not received any message

I wonder what you wrote

[HopeforJustice in reply to Roukaya]

I sent the message directly to your messages, did you receive it?

[Roukaya in reply to HopeforJustice]

I did not receive any reply from you

But I have listened to your advice

It took a lot of courage for you to stand up to your Mother and create a life independently for yourself

Not so easy in my case because I am the only child

She is a bully manipulative and when I told her she has rang to many times she got angry

It is obviously up to you if you will answer as we all have our cross to beat

[HopeforJustice in reply to Roukaya]

My mother is a bully as well. I tend to attract bullies as a result of this trait in my mother. Just be careful when you get into new relationships, friendships or romantic, we tend to gravitate back to our comfort zone. The hardest part of detachment is getting comfortable with the uncomfortable. It takes 3 weeks to form a new habit. Today is day one for you.

[Roukaya in reply to HopeforJustice]

I have just replied to you with the private message

I am fifty it is not so easy to find someone

My Father was violent to my Mother she left and made a successful life

I am her only daughter I looked after her financially when my Father found a younger woman

All that I have done is taken for granted

I find myself today unemployed and unmarried but I should take responsibility for my own life

[Roukaya in reply to Roukaya]

I read why me

What positive thing have you done for yourself today?

Just my prayers that is it

[shoppingblue]

Excellent that you have a plan on facing your fears!!! 😀

[shoppingblue]

Fantastic hope for justice