Its been weeks, feeling on and off , somedays feelings extremely calm but some days very anxious
Obessive over a trigger i got a few weeks back , overthinking hurting myself eventhough i dont feel depressed , just that my anxiety over the post involved self harm urges and i have been panicking for ever that my anxiety makes me shmpathize with this
I have GAD, i wasnt diagnosed with ocd but i have soke tendancies like body compulsions with my fingers etc.. some obsessive thougts and rituals but never ever thoughts about self harm and im not depressed , but as i said i got triggered about that post and since then i have been feeling unsafe ,
I know deep down i would never hurt myself but the fact that i can control my destiny scared me and i keep worrying that i will get psychotic and hurt myself , lose control , these irrational thoughts are very annoying
I dont want to worry anyone because i am not suicidal , i value life is a blessing and i want to experience so much , im not hopeless , i started therapy and i dont get very anxious anymore
And i started going days without any of these thoughts but when im very anxious i keep overthinking , and since i found out about self harm conpulsions im beyond terrified i will develop it , or already do , i dont know
I totally sympathize with you! I have this issue, only it involves harming others. I have a terrible fear that I will sexually assault someone or say something really disrespectful to someone that they will never be able to forgive. One thing that kind of helps (even though it might not take away the thoughts completely) is to remember that you're worried about it, and the fact that you're worried about it means that you're very unlikely to do it. I'm also wondering, is there something deeper behind this-like a traumatic event or anything? I ask because my fear of doing something bad and unforgivable to someone else has its roots in a bad experience I had once.
I dont think in my case it results from a traumatic event , i mean maybe something in my troubled childhood but i dont recall anything specific, i have went almost whole last week not thinking about it but today it hit me very hard , i wasnt diagnosed with ocd but i tried home techniques of cbt and it helped a bit , but i just started to feel really low and not in a good place
Im sorry you feel this way too , but youre right that if we are this worried about it , its very unlikely we will do it , probably even more than someone who doesnt suffer this problem , because when im very calm i dont feel any obsessive thoughts making me think like i am urged to do something i truly dont , i keep remembering i have control over my body and regardless of all the panic , i know myself and i wont lose control