These days I either feel severely anxious going into public, or very depressed at home by myself. Friends/family make plans with me, & it's like I have to choose. Either go, & feel extremely anxious the entire time, or stay home depressed. I don't know which one is worse. Both make me have thoughts of killing myself. (which I definitely won't, because I'm an aunt, & love people) Today I asked my sister if we could get coffee, and she asked seeing if I could go in and order it myself. I felt so anxious, so she went in for us instead.
Do you ever feel like your choosing between anxiety or depression? Which is worse for you?
I felt so mad at myself for not just going in. Luckily, I have my sister who tells me to be gentle with myself, and also tells me that once I get my meds right then I'll be able to do more things with much less pain.
So if you need to hear it... I am telling you what my sis would say: "Be gentle with yourself & keep fighting because you are loved."