the bad beginning: stuck in a deadlock

[Cocotama]

Hello everybody

I feel desperate and blocked at the moment and I don't know how to move ahead in my life. I want to get a job but I always fail to cope with the professional and social life, I passed my academic years good because I kept myself out of sight as I could sitting back and avoiding relationships I did all I could to avoid attention and being in the spotlight and the times I was obliged to speak in public was a real torture for me. I 've got graduated a year ago and tried so many jobs but couldn't keep on I run away in one or two weeks, the longest period I passed in a job was 3 months; I pushed my self to go until I felt like killing myself rather than going because I felt so bad about myself and felt like an alien and everybody's judging me poorly because of the stupid things I do when I'm in a group of persons. I get panic attacks when I'm in a group of persons and when I have to talk I blush and start talking rubbish.

I need to work I can't afford to stay home I need an income to make a living but I'm afraid, I'm done of those feelings I have when I must interact with others and the horrible emotions I experience before I run away I'm really afraid of living this horrible agony over again and again How can I overcome this fear of meeting people on my own?

[Agora1]

Hi Cocotama, apparently you are a bright educated young person who is attempting

to get into the real life. I think there are many like yourself who struggle socially when

getting that first job right out of school.

We all go through this. You are not alone in feeling like you don't fit in and are being

judged. It's going to be okay, once you find a job that fits you. Meanwhile, try working

on yourself. There is a video on YouTube that can help get you started.

"How to Build Self Confident" by Michelle Phan

One step at a time xx

[Cocotama in reply to Agora1]

Thanks a lot for your piece of advice, I will see the video and wish me good luck to find and settle down in another job.

[Agora1 in reply to Cocotama]

Believe in that it will happen when the time is right. xx

Good Luck