I am trying Soo hard to be a better more understanding and helpful husband. But today was really difficult for me. It started with the realization that my wife packed several quarts of shampoo for our trip. She knows I try to pack light.
Later 4 of us are crossing the street, as we proceed across she drops back. I have explained to her that doing so confused drivers and makes it more likely that someone will be hit. It just goes on like this, almost constantly. If I say black she says white, up down.
I find it difficult to be patient and loving under constant attack.
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Billsfriend
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Would it help to realize these are differences between the two of you and not meant to be an attack? You pack light, she might like to be prepared for any eventuality on a trip. She might need some encouragement when crossing the road. It simply sounds like personality differences to me.
You are of course right. I have to accept that she can and will do anything she wants to do, any way she wants to do it.
But I miss the spirit of cooperation and comprise that was the Hallmark of our happy relationship.
The truth is that I know I am responsible for that loss, and I work hard on a daily basis to let things go. Still sometimes it's harder to do.
Especially if it involves safety, as in crossing the street in an organized fashion. Or driving in an unsafe manner. I solved the driving problem by doing All of the driving myself.
Really I'm just venting. We get along well most of the time.
Your behavior sounds a little controlling to me . Do you question all her decisions? These seem like insignificant matters to me, not worth bringing up. It's wonderful that you are trying to be more supportive, maybe you could give her a little more space too. Pam
You are definitely right, I was raised in this environment, and it's all I know. I have 7 sisters, and they all rule the roost with an iron fist. I know I can and will do better, but it's very difficult to change 65 years of behavior overnight.
Maybe if you said less, she might collaborate again with you again more? Sometimes the less we say and do, the more we actually get from relationships. It’s definitely easier said than done. But worth a try maybe?
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