Looking for the Wizard!

[rubyslipper]

I am new to this site and want to meet others with, severe anxiety, depression and PTSD. Since my devastating divorce three years ago, my symptoms have escalated out of control. I can hardly get out of bed and now have a companion coming to help me five days a week. A huge financial hard-ship, but necessary to keep me alive. Most of the day I feel hopeless, suffering from a broken heart. I am embarrassed for feeling this way and can't move forward. I do get medical support and take a few medications, but I feel stuck on this winding road. I do get pleasure out of reading and using my creative abilities to make crafts in my apartment. I find little pleasure in eating. I would love to exercise to get stronger, but can't push myself to follow thru.

I lost my best friend (my ex-husband) and miss him every day.

Perhaps my broken heart will heal one day.

Rubyslipper

[mrmonk]

Welcome to this HealthUnlocked forum, rubyslipper! There are many kind and understanding folks here who are coping with similar struggles -- there's almost always someone around with an empathetic ear to listen.

What sorts of books do you enjoy reading?

Again, welcome. You've already begun your journey of healing; you will get there, I'm certain.

Take care and be well.

“If we walk far enough...we shall sometime come to someplace.”

[rubyslipper in reply to mrmonk]

I love reading self help, mysteries and biographies:history. Glad I found the site

[Hidden]

I think you and I have a lot in common. I lost my wife of 15 yrs. in Jan. last year. As you can imagine this past "holiday" season was especially difficult for me. Retired, living off SS disability, alone...she predicted that I would die a bitter, lonely old man. I have a feeling she was right. Her birthday would have been Dec. 27; talk about a double whammy. Then the whole New Years thing...not for me. Home alone, turtled up inside my shell, tucked down in a burrow I call "bed." Even you are doing something, little things that take your time and attention. Good. I do nothing except play on the computer - usually here or YT - and watch a few minutes of t.v. Eat a meal (bowl of soup) about once a day and I'm set. Like you I would like to do something different, but simply pushing myself over that boundary to MOVE is so difficult. Don't know about you but the longer I stay in the deeper my agoraphobia becomes. I like it indoors, there's few reasons to go out. Dollar Store up the road has canned soup, no need to go further. Perhaps I'm not the best to offer advice, but I do use medical marijuana for chronic pain (all cash, all out-of-pocket) cause doctors have nothing to offer but OTC meds. In pharmaceutical strength. Read a pain doctor's report yesterday that stated no new pain med breakthroughs are expected to come within the next ten years. Pain med makers are simply running scared and not doing the R&D necessary due to no possible guarantees of return on the investment if FDA/DEA decide "Nope, not gonna approve it." So they toss us a bone and let us have MMJ. Been on this bandwagon for decades. It is not a panacea for pain. It helps sure, but not the same thing. Plus no state or federally connected program will touch it. Sorry, just my rant. It's that time of night.

I do like it that you said you do craft work and enjoy reading. Though I really enjoy reading (a spread of genres but currently a fav is sci-fi related) but I have no creative abilities at all. Except with my words. Don't know if that is creativity or onnery ranting, depends on who I ask I suppose. Well I am no wizard so can't help you there. More of a "town cryer" type of person. If you need advice then you've come to the right place, only the wrong person. But still I got to say "Hey!" you are welcome to come in and spill your guts. We'll be more than happy to share anecdotes, advice, personal experiences in life and with meds. We'll be sure to tell you what meds are good and which are, IMHO, not so good. My personal favorite is Xanax to help keep me settled down, along with MMJ if available. If I can afford it. Take care m'dear, come to join and contribute or simply sit on the sidelines and watch the rest of the game in action.

[lillyofthevalley37]

Walking would be the best exercise for you I think

Just a walk round your neighborhood for 20 minutes to start with

[Billsfriend in reply to lillyofthevalley37]

Or 5 minutes if 20 is too daunting.

I started with 5 minutes/day, then 5 minutes 2x day etc.

Actually need to start there again and work my way up!