The Mother: This is what I call she who... - Anxiety and Depre...

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The Mother

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
9 Replies

This is what I call she who birthed me. She just lost her husband a few days shy of 60 years. Now she understands some of my battles she tells me on the phone just now.

We lose the best person in both our lives and THATS what it takes to wake you up to others feelings, particularly your own daughter.

Where has she been? 56 years of gaslighting and I’m supposed to shout hallelujah you’ve seen the light now?

How big of a person am I supposed to be? I’m exhausted with these games and I quit playing and now your eyes are open?

Admittedly I’m quite irritated right now.

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NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty
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9 Replies
All_alone profile image
All_alone

I seen this phrase a while back that opened my eyes to someone playing games in my life, but this person was a friend not family.... "sometimes the game isnt worth playing anymore."

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty in reply toAll_alone

Amen! I recall saying something similar to an ex-husband. It just floors me when some people finally get it.

All_alone profile image
All_alone in reply toNeuronerdDoaty

It's also flooring when they dont get that you've stopped playing....

TheMeg profile image
TheMeg

This may be pessimistic but I would struggle to even trust that this isn’t just a ploy to get closer to you now that she’s more alone. Do what’s best for you. There comes a point where forgiveness does more harm than good. Stay strong and trust your gut.

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty in reply toTheMeg

I agree. I have a watchful eye on her. Sneaky old thing.

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

Omg I got this with my own mother! My attitude was the same as yours ie a bit friggin late and I got irritated with her and had to walk away. x

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

Just let it play out with a grain of salt....and have your armor on....it's not safe until time has passed for a long time of consistent positives from her. A few moments of remorse don't cut it in my book. She has to earn her relationship with you, but sadly you probably won’t ever really be able to trust her. The scars are too deep.

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye

It may seem as if her eyes have been opened but what has actually happened is now that she is alone she feels she might need you. When she figures out that she doesn't she will revert back to her normal relationship with you. I know about this kind of Mother because I had one. They never change unless it benefits them. Fool me once, shame on you / fool me twice, shame on me. Run.

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty in reply tosweetiepye

I believe 😳

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