Loneliness is the worst on the holidays

[staggent]

This whole thing of anxiety and severe depression is very new to me. I used to have an friends and family to celebrate with and now it seems to be all gone. It’s just me and my mom. (I know, at least I have her) Does anyone have tips on how to cope with this? It has destroyed my self-esteem and makes me want to hide in the fog of my medications. I feel like I must be a weak person due to how low and down I’m feeling about myself. I know I’m far from the only person sad and alone through the holidays. But I’ve got to wonder, how do you do it??

[NWGal]

I suggest making the best Thanksgiving dinner EVER and put on a movie you both LOVE. Share something you're thankful for with your mom - even if its simply her. I often am thankful for a home, my pets, my husband, daughter and grandchildren. When we speak out loud or write about these things they seem to be more meaningful! Watching the Macys parade on Thanksgiving morning is a ritual for us, even though we really don't watch it. It seems so festive!

[staggent in reply to NWGal]

Thank you. I suppose making the best of what you have is the greatest thing to do

[NWGal in reply to staggent]

Being present and thankful is the key!

[Booklover0219]

I’m feeling like this too right now. It’s just me and my hubby. Years ago we had our kids and family but a lot has changed this past year. I’m trying to adjust to being alone like you are and I don’t want to forget how fortunate I am to have my hubby. I can see that he is sad too right now and he doesn’t want to talk about it. It’s really hard. I think the best we can do is spend a lot of time thinking about the nice blessings we do have in our lives and enjoying the peace of mind we can have in a comfortable and safe home. I’m seriously considering volunteer work next Thanksgiving and Christmas.

[Junella]

My family is gone too as is my husband's. So we do have each other. We are seniors and I miss my family and the holidays with them. I even miss my pets.

I have a history of anxiety and depression that can be easily triggered by circumstances. Like you I am very sensitive and was born that way and a family tragedy as a child set made it worse. But I have had happy times too. I have found improvement with a healthy lifestyle and a spiritual life and belief system. Exercise works better than any pill (but have taken those too). A healthy diet and regular sleep, deep breathing relaxation exercises each day for 15 mins. You probably know these things, but just in case people haven't considered their value in mental health I repeat them to everyone. Of course, you need to cultivate a group of friends or attend a support group. Join clubs, etc.

Love your mother and let her know how much she is appreciated. Perhaps talk about happier times.

[Hidden]

I have to spend them all alone lol. It’s hard. It’s taken me losses to realize how grateful I am for most anything. I had a lot before then life happened. Wasn’t my fault. Choose to concentrate on what you do have and make them feel special appreciated. And with Xmas around the corner give to those people around you in your everyday in a way you can and see how it feels.

[Sadlost2019]

It is very hard. I was married for a long time to someone I knew since I was 19 we had 2 sons, dogs, house etc. He left me, the boys are grown and its just me. I try to make the best of it. I send holiday greetings to my friends, I make some food and just keep saying its a day like any other day. I try to occupy my mind so I am not dwelling on the loneliness. Very sad to say but you are not alone. I wish you well.

[pandaeyes1]

You’re not weak at all! It’s normal to feel loneliness. Holidays are difficult because there is so much emphasis on family and being together. Maybe spend time with your mother? Find things to do that make you happy or things that you enjoy. I catch up on things I’ve wanted to do but out off. Holidays are about celebrating life! So let’s celebrate it together. We’ve survived so far, and I think that’s amazing.