Don't give up-Find the Right Practitioner- My Journey

[Sababamomma]

What made me look for a support site? I know that there are people suffering with no end in sight. I was suicidal more than once but thankfully found the right treatment. I hope that my story will serve as inspiration and motivation.

My message is don't give up. There is no one treatment fits all. Find the practitioner who can help you. Your life is waiting for you. I have been married for 43 years to a wonderful man, went through 10 years of infertility and 5 years until we adopted our daughter. I have had a successful career.

Acute depression was common on my father's side of the family. In my teens, I began experiencing acute periods of generalized anxiety and depression.

In college, I had a panic attack that lasted a year. I can only describe the feeling as being buried alive or having a gun to one's head. I had to drop out and was hospitalized, treated with every kind of pharmaceuticals and ECT that wiped out my memory. I returned to college and had a repeat episode and was treated in a psych hospital and subjected to more meds and ECT. I always experienced side effects but no relief. I was diagnosed as bi-polar but I didn't seem to fit that criterion. Right after I got married I was at a friend's wedding and suddenly I was overwhelmed by anxiety and ended up in a locked ward in NYC.

I am a fighter by nature and tried everything. I finally found a doctor who was an expert in pharmacology and I trialed different medications. Lithium and Parnate (MAO) were finally prescribed and I have been taking them for about 40 years and they have served as a prophylactic with success.

A few years ago I stupidly stopped taking the medications. I experienced an acute episode. Fortunately, I was seeing an APRN at a psych practice who rescued me. For the first time, I also couldn't sleep for days. She adjusted my MAO added a very small dose of Seroquel at night and small dose of Xanax after trying a few other medications. Since then, I don't even experience the kind of anxiety I used to over every day stressful situations.

Don't give up!

[Agora1]

Sababa, I was very moved by your positive post in never giving up.

We have nothing to lose but everything to gain in proceeding forward

in life. Great inventors never gave up, that one more time led to the

inventions of many great things. Our bodies and mind are certainly worth

not giving up on. Thank you for sharing that your belief in knowing something,

someone was out there who could help, paid off. I'm so happy for you and am

glad you shared with us. xx