Heaviness: There is so much weight on... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Heaviness

Starrlight profile image
64 Replies

There is so much weight on me right now. I need help. It’s all too much.

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Starrlight profile image
Starrlight
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64 Replies
Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Oh I meant heavy as in tough depressing overwhelming situations weighing on me.

in reply to Starrlight

Lol starlight I'm sorry this is to funny' im sure they thought different but its crackin me up..I hope you feel better. I'm in the same boat I honestly feel like I'll be permanently this way and it's not scary but it makes me wonder alot about the upcoming years'..I'm hoping theres a way to feel like I can function without these physical symptoms

Mrspjsmom profile image
Mrspjsmom

What is going on? How can I help?

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Mrspjsmom

That’s the thing is that although I need to destress and need to get past some things only time and I myself can really help me and the way I look at my situations. But I appreciate that I can let it out hear and that people like you care. Thanks for being here.

Mrspjsmom profile image
Mrspjsmom in reply to Starrlight

You would be there if the roles were reversed. Just remember your not alone.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Mrspjsmom

True I’m not alone. Thank you.

All_alone profile image
All_alone in reply to Starrlight

So very true about only time and how one looks at their situation. Same for me. But your not alone. Hugs!!

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3

Do you have insurance? Have you look into stomach surgery? I had lost 40lbs because of my anxiety, I couldn't eat, I got scared at one point, I was eating one egg and a cup of V8 juice a day. That has passed. I gained back the weight and then some. Now I can't stop eating.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Want2BHappy3

Oh sorry I meant a heavy feeling not about my weight. Yeah I know what you mean I’m loosing weight because of anxiety, just have no appetite.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to Starrlight

That was me, now I can't stop eating. That's Not good for me because of my Diabetes. I still have anxiety, my stomach is upset All the time. My doctor said I have inflammation. I've tried different things, nothings working. I hope you get better

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Want2BHappy3

Oh wow I’m sorry about the diabetes and inflammation. Thanks Want2BHappy3

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to Starrlight

Thanks, I'm still trying to figure it out? It's so confusing, they say you can eat this, then No you can't? They mostly talk about high blood sugar, and little talk about low blood sugar which is just as Dangerous as high sugar levels. Which is what I have experienced. Sometimes I'm afraid to go anywhere for fear of fainting? I'm getting better insurance, hopefully? With more options.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Want2BHappy3

Oh yeah. I know someone who had diabetes. She didn’t keep a good diet. Fear of fainting, I know that’s rough.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to Starrlight

I do my my best, it's defficult to keep track of, one thing I did get is that if you're eating carbs, eat some protein with it. It'll help keep your sugar from spiking.

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to Want2BHappy3

I don't know where you live but years ago I attended a wellness retreat center near Sacramento, Calif. that had a program for reversing diabetes and heart disease. The people helped were many. It was expensive at $3000 for 3 weeks and insurance took care of medical exams, so it was less. Check out Weimar's Newstart program on-line. There are similar places but most cost a lot more. There are others in different parts of the country I have heard of that are in that price range.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to Junella

Thanks, so was it everything they said? I went to a siminar here in California that offered to help with reversing Diabetes. I found out that you have to be careful with these kinds of programs? This one seem like a scam? The doctor seemed errogant, just talked about money, wouldn't answer questions. Told us that if we do this or had to do that, he had a waiting list, that we could leave? People were turned off by this. Most left. It's hard to know who to Believe? You could say both sides are about money? If I gave up my medication I'd be taking a chance with my life?

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to Want2BHappy3

No one should be telling you to get off medications! If you plan to in the future, it should be under a doctor's care and done gradually over a period of time like six months. Beware of anyone talking about money.

At Weimar my husband and I lost weight and our labs looked beautiful. Because I know the people (I also did an article on the program for a magazine and my part was free.) I can vouch for them and the program. They are Christian-oriented and have counseling services, but I didn't see any pressure on this point. The owners are Seventh-day Adventists, and as you know they are touted as having a longer life than the general public due to being vegetarian and stressing health.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to Junella

I'm not looking to go off Medication, did you stop your medication? One of my sister in laws surprised me me that she was Diabetic and refused to take medication??? Ive only told one of my kids about being Diabetic, well I did tell a couple of friends, one seems like she doesn't believe me and the other seem to blame me for getting it? I've heard this to be True, a class I took people in class said they were treated like they were at Fault??? So I haven't told anyone else and found out that I have a desease that will eventually make me Blind " Macular Degeneration". I don't like keeping these kinds of secrets, but my oldest daughter has spoken to another daughter that she's dreading that she may have to take responsibility for me??? I Never want to be a burden to my Family.

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to Want2BHappy3

I can sense your worry, but this does not have to happen to you. Even if we are responsible for our past health failures, what difference does that make now. Why feel guilt over something you can't change. Forgive yourself. You get to start over every day. We might feel guilt over every wrong decision we have ever made, but we know that is pathological. We only have this day--not yesterday. But we can change tomorrow. Like AA says we need to depend on a force outside ourselves; most call this God. And God is, above all, forgiving. And you are loved.

Some say, on good authority, that happiness is not our goal in life. We can't be "happy" all the time, but enjoy the special moments and memories when we got in touch with "joy." But like me, you probably just want to be free of anxiety and depression. I have managed that most of the time--it's the ups and then downs that get us back in those shadows again. I think it's important to know they won't last--at least not in the same severity.

If it helps, diabetes is a common disease that needs watching and medication. Native Americans didn't get this disease until white settlers brought them alcohol, sugar, and unhealthy foods. Alcohol was the main culprit and they have been cursed with it ever since because if I heard right, they have a predisposition to alcoholism.

There are worse diseases to have. I have seen people recover just through diet alone. No, I don't have it but husband was prediabetic and still occasionally checks his blood sugar when he doesn't watch his diet and weight. On the other hand I remember a man who got on a perfect diet for diabetes and was getting healthy, but refused to stay on it or return to a doctor. He got the health problems you mentioned and worse.

There are also many people with diabetes who control it and live to an old age.

Have faith in what you can do. Love yourself enough to do it. Do it for the loved ones in your family and friends who care about you. Do it for us on here. We love and support you.

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to Want2BHappy3

Just thought of something else. Wouldn't it be better to tell your family so they can support your efforts? Otherwise they might be buying you sweets, candies, cakes, etc. They need to know they can help. You might check drfuhrman.com for some directions and books he has written; I think one is on diabetes.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to Junella

Thanks, one daughter knows, my other daughter has a son " My grandson" that lives with me. She is obcessed with his eating, we have None of this things in the house, 60% are vegetables Everything is healthy not even red meat. I haven't had good direction from doctors, I was told that I didn't need to check my blood and it was ok to skip Medication, I had ran out and was told that??? I even took classes, there have not been any concesstant answers?? I will be seeing a specialist hopefully next month???

in reply to Starrlight

Lmao oh lord bless your heart....I'm not trying to be rude. I'm sure some others got your message differently but damn this is too funny..🤣🤣🤣

ecgmmom profile image
ecgmmom in reply to Want2BHappy3

I have lost 10 lbs this week due to my depressive episode and I have NO appetite! It is a testament to my dysfunction but I keep thinking about the people on Naked and Afraid that can go three weeks without eating and be fine....right?

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to ecgmmom

I lived on boiled eggs n V8 juice for a couple of months? Lost about 40 pounds, I got scared thinking that I was going to end up in the hospital? I didn't get the point of that show? Their Naked but their private parts are blocked? I never watched the show but saw previews...what's being Naked got to do with surviving? You can have underwear on like the survivor show and still need to Survive?

ecgmmom profile image
ecgmmom in reply to Want2BHappy3

Yeah I think even Neanderthals had the wherewithal to cover their privates, probably less for embarrassment and more for practicality. Who knows, maybe they eat Big Macs every night lol

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3 in reply to ecgmmom

Mmm,my favorite, can't eat them anymore, high cholesterol 😖. I still don't get the naked theme? Lol

ecgmmom profile image
ecgmmom in reply to Want2BHappy3

chalk it up to ratings I guess LOL.

Annabelle61 profile image
Annabelle61

Are you able to talk about it ? We can listen ❤️

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Annabelle61

Thanks Annabelle, right now I don’t feel like I can get into all that’s bothering me. Thank you.

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty

I like to remember that these times don’t stay. Every day is a new one and I can make it what I want.

I hope you can put the world down soon and you get relief.

Doaty💛

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to NeuronerdDoaty

Thank you Doaty ❤️ I feel I have little control over it, how terrible I feel every day. I know I have choices and I can try to make things better but can’t seem to make much of a difference.

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty in reply to Starrlight

I just hate these times. Sometimes we just hold on and wait them out, don’t we? Try to focus on little caring things for your senses and taking quiet time to yourself. Let it flow past you as much as possible. I like these times for keeping me in touch with true priorities. I can practice shutting out the truly unnecessary.

Sending you peace my friend

Doaty💛

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to NeuronerdDoaty

So brilliant thanks for sharing that! Yes true priorities.

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to NeuronerdDoaty

Not sure what you mean by these times or that it is any worse--it's just that technology bombards us with all the negative stuff and some of it it can't be trusted (some of the news for example). But in western countries we have so much. When I read about all the people being persecuted and killed because of their religions or country, I can't imagine what they must feel in those places and am thankful where I am. That may not resolve our own anxiety/depression for good but it helps count our blessings and call out our negative thoughts that do a number on our feelings.

ecgmmom profile image
ecgmmom in reply to Junella

I can normally do that- think about people in the world suffering more than I ever have! But in my current state of mind, which is new to me as of the last few months, even that does not refocus me from my anguish. Then I feel horribly selfish and guilty and the cycle perpetuates....

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to ecgmmom

Yes, we do that to ourselves. It's called circular reasoning, and we believe our lying brains and put ourselves down instead of being thankful. I find it helps to donate to the charities I know are helping the refugees in the mideast. I can't go there, but maybe can do a little. Of course, we have to know our charities which I do. You probably don't have time for volunteer work now--I would suggest you spend time on your physical needs. We are whole persons and what affects the mind affects the body and vice-versa.

BrainFog-Ninja profile image
BrainFog-Ninja

Hi Starr...

Sorry you are feeling so bad. I hear you. The overwhelming “weight” of things stacking on what we are already stretching to be able to tolerate sometimes becomes even more unbearable.

And so let’s breathe together....AND IN-2-3-4...AND blow OUT-2-3-4 🤗

😲😲😲——->😤😤😤

I’m having similar issues now with things coming from every direction, and have been making a very purposeful decision not to think about anything except the most urgent item to get done.

When my worry brain tries to railroad me with all the pressures, and stressful stuff piling up.....I say: I’m ok, and I’m not listening bc it will make me miserable if I do. Nobody got time for all that. So my brain not allow to think about such things until further notice...😂🤣

Only can consider one 🔥 at a time, and only if I can do something about it. Not what comes next, or anything else. Not any extra space for “worries” about family member’s possible health situations, or finances, etc.

Tackle a 🔥 then my head hollers—NEXT in line please. No brain-loitering in between....keep it moving—keep it moving. Too dangerous right now. Hahahaha.

So, I’m scooting along (albeit not pretty at all)....and keep moving on to my next emergency 🔥 to put out. Bc I know that if I were to stay still for too long, or think about anything too hard.....pretty sure I would crumble, and fall into the dreaded depression pit again. At a minimum, I could cause myself some serious panicking. PAAASS!

I would say try exercising—but that would make me an advice hypocrite, since I can’t seem to be able to do that myself.

Hope your strains lighten-up soon. You didn’t share what kind of things are causing such pressure. Maybe blurbing out some of the causes would help release some of the stress? Hope you feel better soon.🍄 🌞 🌸

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to BrainFog-Ninja

Sorry I replied wrong, look further down for my reply.

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to BrainFog-Ninja

Exercise works better than any pill and can change feelings in minutes. Even ten minutes at a time can help. Also avoid sugar, white breads/cakes and too much salt.

Likeabadstorm profile image
Likeabadstorm

Hugs. We are all here for you. You are not alone.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Likeabadstorm

Thank you so ❤️

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Brilliant Brainfog ninja! Very good tips you shared, thanks. I need to brush up of my mindful meditating so I can get better at choosing my thoughts. Sometimes they are intrusive and streaming through relentlessly. I actually exercised twice today but I still suffered. Well best to you!

BrainFog-Ninja profile image
BrainFog-Ninja in reply to Starrlight

Lol. Be gentle with those words....if you call it “meditating” I can’t do it!! 😂🤣😂

Way to go on the exercise commit!! ((This is me trying to slurp-exercise-mojo-off-your-loafers....🤪🥴))

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to BrainFog-Ninja

Heehee so funny 😆

Junella profile image
Junella in reply to Starrlight

When I lay in bed in the am and don't get right up, I try meditating but it easily turns to rumination of problems in the past and future! I find I can do it away from the bed with a relaxation tape or music with the deep breathing. I have something called Respirate that you can read about on line. It was patented for high blood pressure but works like a deep breathing exercise and keeps the mind focused on some specialized musical sounds while showing the breaths per minute to keep you in the zone.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Junella

❤️

So sorry for the troubles or whatever is going on everyone is here feel free to share

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

❤️

Pakboong profile image
Pakboong

Me​ too.​ You​ are​ not​ alone..

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Pakboong

❤️

Booklover0219 profile image
Booklover0219

I’m sorry. I know the feeling. I woke up this morning feeling that way too. What could help you feel better? I’m going for a walk in the park this weekend.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Booklover0219

I’m walking to the bus stop then to the school soon. Then after I will pot a bulb with my kids.

Your walk in the park sounds great!

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply to Starrlight

One foot in front of the other. You're doing good.

You're a great mother :) xx

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Agora1

That means a lot to me. Thank you so Agora 🙏 😊

Wishing you beautiful times.

How are you feeling today Starr. Just one step at a time x slowly cross things off any to-do lists you have or just rest and take time out from any pressures x

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Awesome advice Hope yeah I slept all day which is not like me. I’ve been so stressed over needing to sort out kids’ insurance. I have 90 days to get my husband to come in with me because he can explain his self employment bit to our case worker. I feel like I need his support too but he’s been working every day all day. Still I think it’s okay because 90 days from November 11 is a long time and I’ve got the paperwork sorted finally...Its just hard to relax until it’s done you know?

I think I’ll watch a movie with my family tonight to destress.

How are you doing today?

pink318 profile image
pink318

Hello Starrlight,

I’m so sorry to hear about the heaviness you are going through. Do you want to talk about it? Please feel free to share your feelings, I hope this forum will be an encouragement to you and helps you to feel better.

No matter how difficult you may be facing now, I want to encourage you to stay strong. It may be hard to bear but I hope you will find the strength and peace to keep going each day. Please hang in there. I pray that you will get through this season. Please keep us posted.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to pink318

It makes a difference that you reached out to me. Thank you, Pink.

I feel like my mind is playing tricks on me. Panic attacks bother me. If I can sleep then I can escape it for a short time. Sometimes I feel that I care so much that I drive myself crazy. Or it’s just that my imagination makes up terrible scenarios that I believe are happening or will happen. Like one of my loved ones is going to choke and die or be in an accident...things like that. I feel exposed when I’m around people and I get afraid of them, that they will see all the craziness I feel I have within me and that I try to hide. I haven’t drank for a few days but I was, to get relief, but then i felt it got out of hand. So now I suffer waiting to get a break. I can’t recall a good day since October, at the end of October I recall having a feeling of peace and joy, before that, I can’t recall. Since then none. I keep wishing I were dead. That’s what I want right now. Or to feel better but it doesn’t seem an option. Then the guilt comes from that wish because my kids need me. I’m trying so hard. There are things I am having trouble doing like driving and I feel down because of my fears and feel I’m stupid sometimes maybe because it’s so hard to concentrate. I’m in so much pain and exhausted. Thanks for listening.

pink318 profile image
pink318 in reply to Starrlight

Hello,

Thank you for sharing. I'm so sorry to hear about this.

Please know that we are here for you, you can also message me anytime.

I pray for comfort and you will get through this season. I hope to hear from you again.

Nom-D-Ploom profile image
Nom-D-Ploom

I'm sorry you are going through so much. If I could help in any way I would...

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Nom-D-Ploom

Thank you Nom-D-Ploom. It helps that you are here and reached out to me. Thank you. How are you?

Nom-D-Ploom profile image
Nom-D-Ploom in reply to Starrlight

I am OK. We got my father declared incompetent. That was hard, but it's over now, and that is good.

Ddorne profile image
Ddorne

So sorry you’re feeling bad. It’s a hard time of year, these holidays. In solidarity I’m with you and praying for you.

LD

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Ddorne

Thanks awesome you.

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