Alone

[1973m]

Is anyone around .. it’s early and I’ve been awake since 4 ... wondering where my life is heading!

[Chanshan]

Early?? Which country? It is just dinner time for us. What is going on? You are OK?

[Chanshan]

I don't want to eat. Sitting with severe pain in my head due to depression. Going to drink Whiskey which I know is going to make things worse. I don't have any other alternative.

[1973m in reply to Chanshan]

That will make it worse .. u need to eat a little. Please

I know appetite doesn’t always come easy.

I just wake early sometimes when stuff is on my mind and then I feel sick and panic . My own worst enemy.

U ok ? Do you want to tell me your story?

[Chanshan in reply to 1973m]

I am having clinical depression and it gets triggered once in a year or so. It has been on for almost 6 weeks now and I ah this extreme pain in my head. Don't know what to do. Just woke up with severe hangover and depression. Worst combination.

How are you? Are you feeling any better?

[Sunrize]

Hi 1973m . I am feeling a little useless writing to you 4 hours later. But I am conquering my anxiety and writing to you anyway. I hope you were able to go back to sleep. I can sooo relate to what you were saying. I often feel that way. Hard to sleep, yes. But even more - where am I headed? What am I doing? I appreciate you sharing. 😊

[Sunrize]

oops - now I see it is 6 hours later... but same

[1973m in reply to Sunrize]

Hehe , that’s made me smile .. no worries absolutely time you’ve responded. I did go back off ! Hate that “ witching hour “ as I call it!

I just wonder about my future now I’m separated and at the end of a divorce and my family are grown .. I mean I’m not old and I’ve friends but it’s daunting meeting new people and getting to know them I always make a fool of myself and read into things too much .. I’ve met a great guy but I’m just pushing him away with my anxieties! Wish I was more confident!

Hope you’re ok , what anxiety do you mostly suffer with?

[Sunrize]

Hi 1973m ! Thanks for responding! ☺️

I can totally relate to what you are saying. I have a family, a job. I enjoy them. But I am so so critical of myself. It causes me social anxiety (like you are describing!) and general anxiety (GAD), and sometimes depression. They are all within the realm of “normal” (if there is such a thing!). Meaning I can function - but only I know what is going on inside my own head. Such doubt! And self questioning and criticism. I sometimes stutter or get flushed when I am in a social situation. I can navigate it. But I wish that didn’t happen! It feels good to share with you. Thanks! 👍

[Sunrize]

Wondering how you survived the witching hour this time? 🙂