I’m so alone and scared. I wake up every morning with horrible anxiety about being alone. I get maybe 6 hours of sleep. I have no one to talk to, no friends or family. I’m afraid I’m going to end up in a hospital because I fear I will no longer be able to take care of myself. I worry because I have no one to call for help. If one thing goes wrong, my car breaks down and I’m unable to get to work I’m in trouble, I commute 32 miles to work and no one would be able to drive me. And I live almost paycheck to paycheck. It’s a constant spiral of negative worrisome thoughts. I can’t make it stop and I’m afraid.
I’ve lost so many people in my life as many of you know. My childhood was so happy and secure. I often think back to that time when I was younger, I had family and friends around and very few worries. Now I have nothing to look forward to. So I live in the past, and dwell on those happy times. It’s all I got.