Wish my sister would allow us to connect

[LookingforSunrise]

I have an older sister who seems to be angry most of the time. At least she seems angry when I am around her. We did not talk for about 1 year. I would like to reestablish the relationship but she is very resistant. I don't know if I should push harder or just let it be? I feel very sad that it may never work. She is my only sister. Any advice?

[Hidden]

I'm sorry you are going through this. I have one sister who is loaded while I have taken toilet paper from work and she doesn't care. I am better off without her and it's been about twenty years. If she doesn't help you I would let it go. You can't make people care and sometimes it easier without them.

[Tealribbon]

Oh my I understand I'm in the same boat. I don't have any words of wisdom. It simply breaks my heart. I would love to have her unconditional love, but I doubt that will ever happen. She has pulled the " I'm not speaking to you card" so many times I've lost count. I'm almost to the point of relinquishing my dream of being close. I hope things work out better for you. Hugs

[LookingforSunrise in reply to Tealribbon]

Thanks much. I understand your dilemma. I really feel for you. Others have responded tome and said something similar to what you said so we are not alone. For the time being I am going to keep trying. I want to at least give it a good try before letting go.

[Hidden]

Sorry this has happened.

From what I’ve heard it’s unfortunately not uncommon in families..

I never see much of my brothers and when we do speak I feel they trigger me from the experiences I had as a child in a neglectful dysfunctional household. For my healths sake I’ve let the boundaries increase and I let them go with love..I feel sad about it but it was toxic too, their behaviour towards me wasn’t good, unlike me they don’t realise our childhood caused us issues.

I don’t feel there is always an easy answer ,when there are so many questions to ask. Maybe to discuss this with a counsellor would help, discussions around your feelings, why her anger. What is going on with her, and if it’s unhealthy to try to work it out, or if there are ways to work it out, and the best way forward. Sometimes it is best to let go, other times it’s good to try, each situation is very different, and lots of circumstances bring us to where we are in a relationship.

In my opinion Always consider your health ..

Good wishes 🌻🌻

[LookingforSunrise in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Olivia40, you are very thoughtful and insightful so I appreciate your response. I am sorry to hear about you and your brothers. I guess for now I will keep trying knowing that I may get hurt. At least I can say to myself that I tried.

[BrownEyesBlue]

I have 3 older sisters. One is passed. It’s difficult trying to establish a relationship with the other two. I’m the “little” sister and since Mom has passed I feel they think they have to mother me in some way.

I’ve made mistakes. There comes a point though when you have to realize sometimes people can’t give you what they don’t have to give. It’s sad. You can’t be the only one fighting for a relationship.

Mine always seem mad too. I have to keep reminding myself not to take it personally. Ask her point blank if she has an issue and if it’s possible to work towards a sisterly relationship. It may work and it may not.

From my own personal experience m, don’t force anything. Don’t continue trying so hard and jumping oceans when people wouldn’t skip a puddle for you. It works both way. You can’t be the only one trying.

I hope everything works out for you. I really do ♥️

[LookingforSunrise]

Thank you, you are right on track. I was thinking about asking her about having a more sisterly relationship. I don't think we are quite in a place to do that I will eventually do that.