I've known for some time now that something was wrong and felt like it was taking control over me. It has slowly gotten worse over the years do to problematic stepchildren and my spouse to the point where I could not ignore it anymore. I went to the doctor and sure enough I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Just hearing that confirm my suspicions and made me feel worse. I've tried to talk to my spouse about it but he says "he has it and it's not that big of a deal" (although I've never seen him go to a doctor or seen a doctor's report confirming he's been diagnosed with it) he just completely dismissed me and my feelings.. he told me he would be here to support me through this but all he's been doing is telling me I'm the reason why I have anxiety, stress and depression and how I'm the cause of a lot of problems and if it weren't for me people wouldn't act the way they would act towards me and cause my anxiety and depression to worsen. oh and how I should be able to just turn my anxiety off like him... it's like he really has no understanding about what this disorder does to people and it's so frustrating and sad because all I'm looking for is support and help and I'm not getting it from the one person I should be getting it from.. if anyone has any advice as to what to do how to help cope with my anxiety stress and depression please feel free to let me know..
Thank you
A.
Written by
Rosebud03
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Sorry for what you're going through - stepchildren . . . . . tricky area.
Be kind to yourself. Don't expect too much from anyone - and you won't be disappointed. Pray like you've never prayed before. Distraction . What did you like doing before you got so stressed / unwell ?
Be determined to get out together. Don't let others upset you, let things go over your head. Try not to take cruel words to heart. Prayer will help with this. Pray for your husband and step children and ask God to deal with them and take the worry from you. Pray for their protection and healing.
If you two could just get out together for a coffee or a day out to a nice park or museum or zoo. Some place of interest for distraction & just try to relax together and just 'be'.
Try not to try to figure everything out - let go and ask God for Peace.
Try and get some early nights - tiredness will make things worse.
Get into the habit of drinking lots of water. A glass or two first thing then one before & after each meal. Anxiety and stress can cause dehydration. Eat well,eat healthy nourishing foods. Plenty fresh fruit and root veg & greens.
AND always remember (as I always say) that you are Precious, Beautiful and Loved. Believe this because it's the truth.
Thank you for your very kind words. I really appreciate all the advice you gave me, I'll take it and use it the best I can u mentioned lack of sleep makes it worse I haven't slept well in months I'm averaging 7-8hrs a week at best. And as far as eating the stress n depression suppresses my appetite so I don't eat much at all. I find myself skipping meals all day almost everyday n when I do eat it's a very small amount ex. 4 apple slices because food doesn't taste sound smell or look good at all, I have no want to eat I have to force myself just to eat what little I do.. I keep myself hydrated with water and pomegranate juice or a cup of sprite every once n a while, it keeps something in my stomach. Needless to say I feel like I'm falling apart at the seems I'm a wreck..
This is serious sleep depravation isn't it and malnutrition. Nothing will function properly within you.
Have you considered asking your GP to prescribe some liquid nutrition whilst you get through this? Have you told your GP everything that you have just put in this reply?
I would see GP again asap.
Do you like Pepsi? I find Pepsi helpful at times when I can't eat. Also Fox's Glacier Mints and Fox's Glacier Fruits to suck for energy. The glucose for energy and the peppermint oil will help stomach/digestive problems. Also Mint Imperials (check they contain peppermint oil & glucose).
But do contact GP (if only by phone) and ask for some fortified drinks on prescription.
Try and get a prescription for some Ensure Plus drinks today ask if you can try the Ensure Plus Fibre. You will need to build up to a full diet but must get some nourishment inside of you asap! Discuss flavours - make sure they order what you like.
Wonder if you need referals to a Gastroenterologist and maybe a Dietician? You could ask.
My husband has been through a lot lately while dealing with his anxiety and depression. He is going to counseling. I would go as well but I went to a couples one with him and came out feeling victimized. I am scared to go for myself though I know I should. It was a bad counselor in my opinion. Anyway, I have to believe your husband really believes that anxiety is the same as nervousness. You know how you get nervous about a job interview or something like that. He probably has no idea what the real diagnosis is. Most people who do not suffer from it just don't understand it. I would recommend going to counseling (even though I am afraid of it lol) and asking the counselor if he/she can recommend how to help him understand. It might be a book, website or even coming in for a session. I wish you luck. I know how it feels to be with someone who you feel doesn't get it or doesn't want to. Give him the benefit of the doubt and try getting him the knowledge he needs to understand.
Sorry your are having to deal with this. I'm in the same boat, except he doesn't believe in any of his stuff and thinks it's non sense and crazy. I hope they never experience the trueness of this because they will be in for a rude awakening. Nobody will truly understand it til they have experienced it themselves and it is a horrible thing to experience and one of the scariest things ever. We have to somehow find our own strength and find some comfort here. I know it socks not having the support within the home and sometimes all you want to do is be held by someone or listened to and that doesn't happen and it's hard. I am thankful for his community hat is for sure. I'm still trying to learn and understand all of this that I am going through. It's almost debilitating me.
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u mentioned lack of sleep makes it worse I haven't slept well in months I'm averaging 7-8hrs a week at best. And as far as eating the stress n depression suppresses my appetite so I don't eat much at all. I find myself skipping meals all day almost everyday n when I do eat it's a very small amount ex. 4 apple slices because food doesn't taste sound smell or look good at all, I have no want to eat I have to force myself just to eat what little I do.. I keep myself hydrated with water and pomegranate juice or a cup of sprite every once n a while, it keeps something in my stomach. Needless to say I feel like I'm falling apart at the seems I'm a wreck.. 
Telling my spouse I'm not OK
Another post, I know. It went so bad with my psych. 
Misunderstood
Spouse with anxiety, depression, PTSD
