Crying in my car

Health anxiety is consuming me, its to the point where im pushing away people. Ive pushed away a loving and caring boyfriend who would massage my sore legs and comfort me during panic attacks. Ive pushed him away many times because i felt he deserved better than me being weak and always anxious. He needs his space but ive been really regretting my actions. The crying about losing him takes me away from my anxiety for a bit but instead of anxiety i feel sadness. Im trying to seek out therapy and im on meds but i feel as if ssris are not for me and may need something else. I worry about never sleeping properly, all started when i was overseas and feared i wouldnt sleep one night for some reason and it escalated to a pojnt where im triggered by images of beds or when people talk about sleeping. I used to sleep well but now i fear not sleeping. I deel envious of people who dont worry about sleeping or developing sleeping disorders (my health anxiety revolves around having/developing a sleep disorder based on symptoms i read online)

[HEJAN417]

Hi, this is familiar to myself and probably alot more people, sorry you are having a hard time. You are not alone, and there is help out there. You can get better! On my road to recovery, I'll share what helped me

1.) talk to a primary or family doctor, see what referrals they have for you

2.) be honest with your doctor or therapist, i was honest about my drug use and feelings of racing thoughts and worries, and with the help of a good doctor, who i felt didnt judge me, he referred me to the best therapist I've ever seen (nothing like the ones i had tried before)

3.) put the work in, do the exercises the doctors ask of you, try to be mindful of how you are feeling and how you choose to react.

4.) Again, be honest. this is important enough to list twice because you cant expect changes if you are hiding things, doctors know that people have set backs or relapses, and they will only help you to move on and keep going but if you dont mention it to them that you are struggling, they cant encourage you and dig deeper or try something else.

5.) keep going, you have to find your strength and find things that work for you. It's not easy and if it was there wouldnt be so many people secretly struggling with mental health issues, etc.

Anyone struggling would be lucky to find a doctor who doesn't judge and you can be honest with, without that, I wouldnt be where i am today.

6.) In my experience, looking online for symptoms/ disorders/ solutions/ even reading and being apart of an online post community like this one- Can also cause anxiety. Try to limit where you go online, or what you trust when you read. You may find helpful things too of course, but overwhelming yourself with tons of info what might be and what might work and what you might have, just backfired and made me more anxious mostly.

I am leaving this posting group as daily there are posts of people struggling in the same or different ways than me, and as I am trying to focus on myself, I want and wish for everyone to find the same help and peace that I am finding. People can vent here, and learn things here Sure but, Real help is up to you. You have to ask your doctor for help to treat you- like you would for any other problem or disorder. The stigma goes both ways.

By no means is any of this easy. 15 years of trying to find the right help- the right doctor- the right medications- the right things to do for myself- I am getting somewhere and I dont expect it to end because I know this will be a journey through my entire life, it's just slowly getting to be a brighter, clearer path.

Good luck to you and everyone.

[NeuronerdDoaty]

So this is when you become even more proactive than you’ve been.

Eat healthy.

Walk or yoga daily.

Color. (Makes all lobes work to spread thought processes.)

Rest when you can.

Snap fingers or tap on table alternately when you begin to think of things that bring on anxiety. Continue to work through the thought as you alternate snapping or tapping.

The anxiety of sleep is just anxiety. It was roaming around in your head and needed to attach to something. It chose sleep.

Be kind to yourself. You may not need meds forever but to help get your brain under control you may need a little help.

Best of luck to you. 💛